The baby’s mom went into labor inside a Chick-fil-A bathroom
If you’re a fast food lover who happens to also be in labor, you’re gonna want to head straight to your nearest Chick-fil-A immediately. A mother recently gave birth at her local restaurant chain and her newborn will now receive…drumroll please…free Chick-fil-A for life AND a guaranteed job when she turns 14.
Robert and Falcon Griffin love Chick-fil-A. They love it so much that they bought their baby a “Little Nugget” Chick-fil-A onesie three months before her birth. It’s only fitting, then, that when Falcon started experiencing contractions the couple stopped by the fast food restaurant to use the bathroom.
The store was closed, but a manager let the couple in.”I’m about to dial 911, I open the door and she’s just screaming,” Brenda Enriquez, Chick-fil-A store director, told KSAT-TV.
That’s when the mother-to-be went into labor. It was an intense process, and Robert helped save the day.
“I stopped her at her shoulders because I saw what looked to be a white collar around her neck, and it was the cord that had been wrapped around her neck twice,” he said. “…All I cared about at the end of the day was the baby was breathing, and by the time they (first responders) arrived, she was pink, thankfully for those blankets for keeping her warm.”
Falcon and her little Chick-fil-A nugget are doing just fine now. Also, as noted before, the newborn has a LIFETIME of free chicken sandwiches ahead of her. And a guaranteed job. Not a bad way to start your life.
The internet had some thoughts on this whole thing. Some lamented the fact that they were born in a boring old hospital — and began making plans for their own future deliveries.
— Ducis Rodgers (@duciswild) July 20, 2018
Selfish move by my parents to give birth to me at a hospital instead of a chick fil a https://t.co/MjqjGkKqvR
— Jawn (@Jcotton2123) July 20, 2018
Gonna have my baby at the liquor store https://t.co/uFoJIAnn2B
— HarlemShakeAtUrWake (@ToastyRamirez) July 21, 2018
Maybe I'll 'unexpectedly' give birth at Chanel https://t.co/YW1OmlTxX2
— Reem Abdellatif – ريم عبداللطيف (@Reem_Abdellatif) July 21, 2018
Others made the excellent point that Chick-fil-A’s newborn reward policy should probably extend to hospitals as well. Because, you know, free chicken is great and all but free health insurance is even more thrilling.
So if I give birth in a hospital, will my baby get free healthcare for life? https://t.co/QdgvD9BTIO
— Ariel Dumas (@ArielDumas) July 20, 2018
Also, many people pointed out that Chick-fil-A has a really awful track record of donating to anti-gay organizations and ex-gay conversion therapy groups.
Unless the baby turns out to be … well, you know. https://t.co/3vLmBmyyun
— VanLathan (@VanLathan) July 20, 2018
*****Unless the child is gay, then Chick-fil-A promises to vilify until her death. https://t.co/TkofM1QFqx
— DesertWolfPS (@DesertWolfPS) July 20, 2018
*if she doesn’t turn out lesbian https://t.co/K8iXovGRpH
— Sharky guns ❄️🖕🏻 (@jram305) July 21, 2018
Here’s hoping that Chick-fil-A becomes a kinder, better company, this baby has a wonderful life, and, you know, cheaper healthcare wouldn’t be too shabby either.