Parenting

Things I yelled at my children to get decent Halloween pictures

by Scary Mommy
Updated: 
Originally Published: 

Some of you have asked how I managed to get Halloween shots with all three of my children smiling. Well, I’m here to tell you the secret: I’m OK looking and sounding like a complete imbecile. Oh, yes, I am.

I am totally and unapologetically shameless when it comes to taking pictures of my kids, especially when costumes are involved. The weather was glorious yesterday and I knew that I had exactly one evening to complete my mission. Who cares if the neighbors can see me jumping up and down and making fart noises in my cheeks? I’m the one going home with the frame-able shots– they can gawk all they want to.

What? It’s not normal to yell the following gems to your children while waving your arms and wearing a two foot long witch hat?

“Look! It’s a bird! It’s going to poop on your head!”

“Fart, fart, doody, doody, poop in your face!”

“I see boogies dripping down your nose!”

“Do I have poop on my nose? Look really close.”

“Diiiiiii-a-reeeee-haaaa!”

Try it next time. I swear, it works.

Until they really decide they’re done.

That’s when you whip out the chocolate.

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