If you’ve already eaten your entire Advent calendar, you’re in good company
Christmas is a time to spend with family, to give to others, and to share in the joy the season brings. It’s a time to reflect on our blessings, to relive the magic of the holidays through our children’s eyes, and most importantly, a time to eat Advent calendar chocolates.
Like, all of them. In one day.
The Advent calendar is a special calendar used to count the days of Advent in anticipation of Christmas. The season of Advent lasts for four Sundays leading up to Christmas Day, but most calendars begin on December 1st. Lots of them have tiny little flaps or doors that open to reveal an appropriately themed holiday scene inside, but no one notices this level of detail if there’s also chocolate hiding in there.
Yes, chocolate-filled Advent calendars are a thing, and a damn wonderful thing at that. We get to wake up and have chocolate for breakfast every single morning for 25 days in a row. Well, it should mean we get chocolate for breakfast every day for 25 days. But that assumes humans have self control and can leave all those other little mouth parties safely inside their doors for the entirety of the holiday season.
But since there aren’t locks on these doors, it also means there’s a slight chance the chocolates don’t actually make it for a full 25 days. According to some folks on Twitter, it can mean they don’t even make it for one day.
— Monica (@Monica_ion) December 4, 2017
Plz notify me if you actually only eat one chocolate per day from your Advent calendar cuz only a lunatic would do that tbh
— Valerie ❤️s Presents (@ValeeGrrl) December 5, 2017
Anyone else already ate their full advent calendar? Nope? Just me. Fat greedy shit
— Jessica Pickering (@Jpickering96) December 2, 2017
already ate all the chocolate out of an advent calendar so that's how my day is going
— Mo Ryan (@moryan) November 9, 2017
It’s nice to know some of us (ahem) are in good company. Unfortunately, this now means my kid’s Advents may be at risk since mine met an untimely death this year. “Gee kids, I don’t know why none of your calendars have chocolates behind doors number 11-15. You’ve obviously done something to upset Santa.”
It seems these folks aren’t faring much better:
Come home to find out that Shannon's ass ate ALL OF HER ADVENT CALENDAR CHOCOLATE ON THE FIRST DAY OF DECEMBER rip pic.twitter.com/dFKAYKdWFm
— Noelle Doran (@Dumbledoran123) December 2, 2017
According to my chocolate Advent calendar, it is currently Dec 24th. pic.twitter.com/J70eYM5BUw
— Nora Berens (@ntberens) December 4, 2017
My phone says it's the 4th December….
… but my chocolate Advent Calendar says it's Christmas Eve
— Gizzy (@gizm0j0e2) December 4, 2017
It looks like this lady ate all of her’s before Thanksgiving. Well played:
I’m gutted that I’ve already ate most my advent calendar and it’s not even December
— gabriella ♡ (@HoneymoonAvex_) November 18, 2017
Look, it’s been a long damn year. It’s clear we’re all at the end of our rope, so if eating 25 little chocolates in one sitting while hiding in our closet with the door locked makes us feel a tiny bit better about the world, so be it.
According to the chocolate Advent calendar I bought yesterday I guess I should wish everyone a Merry Christmas today.
— Dan R (@Social_Mime) December 1, 2017
I will no longer be able to participate in the following, until further notice:
1) Anything that has to do with the freezing cold.
2) Any gathering that contains drunken relatives or white elephant gifts.
3) only being allowed one advent chocolate per day.
— Annie the Nanny (@AnnietheNanny1) December 4, 2017
This woman is my new hero:
i taped my birth control to my advent calendar because i have more faith in my ability to remember to eat chocolate than to not get pregnant
— misha (@mxshxj) December 1, 2017
Perhaps those of us struggling with our calendars should add “only eat one Advent chocolate per day” to our New Year’s resolution list, right after “eat healthier” and “practice more patience.” It’s worth a shot, anyway.