Parenting

Romance Novels Are Helping My Sex Drive During This Pandemic

by Elisha Beach
Updated: 
Originally Published: 
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The pandemic has killed my libido. I don’t know if it’s being around my kids 24/7 or looking at a house that never seems to be clean anymore. Or it could be I am just out of energy after almost a year of virtual schooling and working from home. The bottom line is I am tapped out, and sex is the furthest thing from my mind. So, I have turned to romance novels to help rev my sex drive during this Pandemic.

The fact of the matter is, these are stressful times. Pandemic stress is a real thing, and it is wreaking havoc on all facets of my life, even my sex life. It’s hard to be stressed out and have good sex. When I am stressed, I tend to crave potato chips, salted caramel gelato, and toffee-covered peanuts … not sex.

But my husband is a very physical person, and sex is one of the ways he feels most connected. My husband’s sex drive is very different from mine. If I simply bend over to pick something up in front of him, he is ready to go right away. And don’t get me wrong … my husband is a hottie. One look at his broad back and muscular shoulders usually makes me want to jump him. But these days, I need a little more stimulation to really get me in the mood. And it’s not fair to him, because my lackluster libido has nothing to do with him.

It’s hard to have intimacy when you are both in the midst of juggling a nonstop circus. Add to that no date nights, adjusting to shifting responsibilities, and getting no breaks from each other. We end up with our intimacy taking a back seat to everything else. And on top of that, I just don’t feel that sexy. I have gained some weight, wear sweatpants most of the time, spend the day with kids always in my personal space, and am exhausted from trying to keep up with it all.

And foreplay could do the trick, but it seems impossible for us to get a moment alone. Of course, we hug and kiss each other throughout the day and even manage to get handsy here and there. But it’s not like we can always act on that during the day, and I often crash at night before my husband even gets a chance to make his move.

In short, there is a lot less sexiness in the air in this household. But the thing is, I actually love sex with my husband, and when we do manage to get it in, it is good, and I can feel the stress dissolve from my body. So what’s a girl to do? Romance novels to the rescue.

I am an avid reader. I was before this crazy year and even more so now. There is nothing like a good book to take me away from the monotony of pandemic life. Although, I have to admit that I used to be a bit of a book snob, and I refused to read romance novels. I thought they were just trashy, quick reads that weren’t worth my while. But boy was I wrong about that.

Diving into a fantasy romance world to escape reality has been a great way to end the day. If anything, it can keep me awake long enough for my husband to make it to bed. And one good chapter can give my sex drive the boost it needs to get things going in the boudoir.

And if you think romance novels just aren’t for you, I want to encourage you to rethink that decision. The romance fiction industry is HUGE! There is a genre for just about every reader out there…sci fi, historical, murder mystery, BDSM, erotica, Romcom … you name it, somebody probably wrote it. Whatever desire or fantasy floats your boat, there is a book out there for you.

Suppose you like a good historical romance novel. In that case, the “Outlander” novel series by Diana Gabaldon may be right up your alley. This series has the perfect combination of romance, adventure, and time travel.

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I know it may be old news, but the “Bridgerton” book series is just as hot and steamy as the Netflix show. And the second book is just as titillating as the first.

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And if blue aliens and abduction are your things, Evangeline Anderson is the author for you. Her series “Brides of The Kindred” is a fan favorite.

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If the “Fifty Shades Trilogy” didn’t quite do it for you and you want to stretch your limits a bit more, you should give “The Plume Book” series by Ella Ardent a read. It definitely takes BDSM to the next level.

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Or maybe you just want a straightforward, contemporary romance novel. You can give Alisha Rai a try. She authored the “Modern Love” series covering all the ways of pursuing love and romance in a digital age.

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The truth is, it doesn’t take a pandemic to fall into a sexual rut. Anyone who’s been married for a while can attest that every marriage has its ups and downs. And reading romance novels could be the thing you need to crank up the temperature in your bedroom and get your sex drive back. Just one fair warning … once you start, you may not want to stop.

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