Just like women, pregnancies come in all shapes and sizes.
Some women have perfect pregnant bellies all out front while some bellies are oblong or oval. Some carry high, some low. Some women gain weight from their head to their toes, and others barely look pregnant.
Whichever category you fell into, I bet you got a ton of unsolicited “advice” and comments about your pregnancy and how you looked. I know I sure did.
I was a skinny pregnant woman with both of my pregnancies. During my first pregnancy with my son, I gained about 20 pounds. With my second pregnancy (I was carrying twins), I gained just over 30 pounds. And let me tell you, people had a lot to say about it!
Here are 10 things I learned as a skinny pregnant woman:
1. People think that skinny pregnant women are lying.
One of the first things pregnant women are asked is “How far along are you?” When I would respond “eight months,” people would say things like “No way! You’re really three or four months, right?” or even fun things like “That can’t be right. You’re too small!” and “Are you sure?”
No really, I’m not lying, and I’m sure about how pregnant I am. I just happen to be one of the lucky few who don’t gain a ton of weight when they’re pregnant. I’m tall and naturally slim anyway. Sorry if the size of my belly doesn’t work for you. I have no reason to lie and nothing to hide. Promise.
2. People have a lot to say about how much weight you should gain during your pregnancy.
After we clear up how far along we are, we usually hear something like this next: “Well, you really should be gaining more weight. I gained 50 pounds with my second pregnancy! What does your doctor say?”
I’ve never told any pregnant woman that I thought she was too skinny or too fat. I don’t know what it is about everybody being an expert on pregnancy, but it was always amazing to me that people thought that I hadn’t been taking care of myself or that I was purposely trying not to gain weight. Strangers, on the other hand, know and feel totally comfortable telling another complete stranger what they think.
3. People assume that there is something wrong with you and your baby.
Just because I was a skinny pregnant woman doesn’t mean that I wasn’t healthy. Also, you are not my doctor, and I don’t even know you so please don’t ask me about my medical status. I saw my doctor at every regularly scheduled appointment and my weight gain (or lack thereof) was never an issue. I was thriving, and my babies were too. The doctor said nothing to worry about and so I didn’t.
4. Other pregnant women don’t like skinny pregnant women.
I get it. You’re pregnant. It’s the middle of the summer, and you’re miserable. Your feet and fingers and every other part of your body are swelling, and you’re sweating and can’t get comfortable to save your life.
And then you see me and kind of hate me because I’m wearing a tank top and shorts with a little belly poking through. I’m not comfortable either and I’m sweating like a pig too. I’m just as pregnant as you are, just a different size. #sorrynotsorry
5. People will share a horror story of a friend/sister/aunt/cousin/friend-of-a-friend who didn’t gain enough weight during her pregnancy.
It’s like non-pregnant people like to scare the shit out of pregnant people. Even if the story is true, why would you tell somebody expecting a terrible story? It doesn’t help, and it does no good to share it. This is actually true for any pregnancy horror story no matter who you are.
6. People know what’s better for you than you do.
Your doctor’s wrong. You are too skinny. But no problem—that random lady at the grocery store has you covered and will get you fattened up right away with her super-duper-protein-and-good-fat smoothie that you should drink at least twice a day. Then you’ll be on your way to a successful pregnancy!
7. People think that pregnancy isn’t as hard if you’re skinny.
If you are pregnant and skinny, people assume that you must not have any pregnancy symptoms.
Look, I got those god-awful leg cramps just like everybody else. I couldn’t sleep comfortably. I got migraines. When I was pregnant with twins, I peed about every 10 minutes for the last couple of months of my pregnancy. My pregnancy was just as rough as yours, trust me.
8. People see you eating crappy foods and give you the go-ahead to do it.
Because maybe then you’ll fatten up to a standard pregnancy size.
9. People will still give you all the advice even if you say your pregnancy is perfectly fine as is.
Just nod your head and thank them. It’s really the easiest and fastest way to get out of the conversation.
10. People will still want to touch your belly.
Enough said about that.