If you can’t stand wearing a bra, these are the tweets for you
From the time we’re in middle school, bras are simply a part of life. An often uncomfortable, annoying, sweaty, unflattering, restrictive part of life. As you get older, bras take on new forms and meanings — bras for nursing your kid, sports bras, super-duper support bras for pregnancy, sexy bras, grandma bras — so many freaking bras, but at the end of the day, they all just kinda suck.
That’s why anyone who hates wearing a damn bra will seriously relate to these tweets. And if you love your bras? By all means, tell us your brand — also, stop lying.
First of all, they cost like, a ton.
Ugh there has to be a better way to protest the patriarchy than burning bras. Bras cost like $60 and I need them to walk down stairs
— Dana Schwartz (@DanaSchwartzzz) April 28, 2018
And it bears repeating that they can be horribly uncomfortable.
I wish the patriarchy would stop stabbing me to death with my bra wire
— Ash (an female) ⚪️ (@adult_mom) June 5, 2017
Aside from that, if your fun bags aren’t exactly fun-sized, the options are mostly terrible and ugly.
Those of us with large boobs are obviously so concerned with tit support that we can’t possibly care if our bras are cute colors so they only come in old-lady beige, gotta put all our focus on harnessing these jugs, this is not the time for frivolity
— Valerie (@ValeeGrrl) July 23, 2018
It’s also annoying how only women are expected by society to rein in their ta-tas.
GUY: are you even wearing a bra right now…?
ME: ARE YOU?
— erin chack (@ErinChack) March 13, 2017
As if regular bras aren’t annoying enough, try a sports bra. They’re super fun.
how in this modern age of technological wonders is our strategy with sports bra design still to just lock the titties up in smash jail
— Sweatpants Cher ⚫️ (@House_Feminist) November 30, 2018
I just got an extra 10 minutes of resistance training trying to take off my sweaty sports bra.
— Abby Heugel (@AbbyHasIssues) May 15, 2018
Naturally, those times you try to avoid strapping in the girls, you’ll inevitably regret it.
When you didn't put on a bra to walk the dog but you wave to your neighbor anyway. pic.twitter.com/IF7wN2dDYy
— Elizabeth Hackett (@LizHackett) November 11, 2017
Um, also, why is washing bras the absolute worst and most inconvenient thing ever? Oh, I know — because it’s so hard finding one you don’t hate that you can’t bear to go even one wash cycle without it.
2019 will be the year I finally vanquish* my enemies**
— Jess Dweck (@TheDweck) December 31, 2018
If you can manage to get away with not wearing one, it’s pretty much the best.
i’ve been to work every day this week which is a Win✔️ but i haven’t worn a bra at all which is a Definite Neutral Zone
— beth mccoll (@imteddybless) January 31, 2018
And any woman who claims she doesn’t doff her bra the moment her ass gets home is probably a liar — or a wizard?
The scientific term for a woman who wears a bra inside her own home is “a liar.”
— The Sassiest Semite (@LittleMissLizz) November 23, 2018
Because bra removal is the literal first priority, each and every day.
Instead of a coat rack, I'm gonna put a bra collector next to my front door.
— Mommy Cusses (@mommy_cusses) April 20, 2018
However, the misery of bras is mitigated somewhat by finding them super cheap.
I feel bad for women who say finding true love is the best experience in life. They've obviously never found their bra size on clearance.
— Lurkin' Mom (@LurkAtHomeMom) January 29, 2017
But if you’re got one on that feels too snug? The instinct to run for the hills is REAL.
My bra is too tight and my fight or flight reaction is kicking in big time
— jess ⚪️ (@jessokfine) December 22, 2016
Basically, a world without bras sounds like a dream come true. Maybe 2019 is the year we make it happen. LOL, just kidding — I would hit myself in the face the first time I attempted a light jog.
But a girl can dream.