This important Twitter thread explains why removing a condom without consent is rape
One Twitter user is breaking down exactly why removing a condom during sex without consent should be considered rape. Her tweets – which has since garnered more than 100,000 likes – explain all of the different ramifications a victim might have to deal with after non-consensual unprotected sex, and eloquently tackled the larger idea of consent overall.
In short, it’s a must-read.
Twitter user @iamsashakae began her thread by explaining that removing a condom without consent immediately changes the context of the sex that the other person had agreed to.
“If you remove the condom without the knowledge AND consent of your partner and you continue to have intercourse you have indeed committed rape,” she wrote. “…They did not consent to raw sex.”
if you remove the condom without the knowledge AND consent of your partner and you continue to have intercourse you have indeed committed rape. removing the condom changes the context of the sex they consented to. they did not consent to raw sex. thanks for coming to my ted talk.— coffee bae (@iamsashakae) August 30, 2018
As most everybody knows, there’s an insane amount of serious consequences that come along with sex without a condom. There are sexually transmitted diseases.
you’re not only exposing them to any sti you may/may not knowing/unknowingly have. you’ve now forced them, more than likely a woman, to take EXTRA precautions. those include:— coffee bae (@iamsashakae) August 30, 2018
Side effects from Plan B. Stress over having to go to the doctor and finding out if you have a sexually transmitted disease.
-plan B. which reacts to every woman differently and can have terrible side effects.— coffee bae (@iamsashakae) August 30, 2018
-unnecessary stress due to the fact that she didn’t trust you enough to have unprotected sex so now she has to make a doctor’s visit to be sure she hasn’t contracted anything from you.
-PREGNANCY and some women can’t carry children and can’t get abortions. it’s a thing.— coffee bae (@iamsashakae) August 30, 2018
and before you all say “that’s why you should be on birth control” not every woman can operate on birth control. it can sometimes cause a woman to become very ill. just wrap it bitch.
She went on to explain that there was a time when the concept of consent wasn’t really discussed publicly. But now the conversation is fully out there now, especially in light of the #MeToo movement, and people need to educate themselves.
“Things like coercion, deception, fucking a drunk girl because she drunkenly said yes…earlier on you probably didn’t know those things were sexual assault because society did not teach us that,” she wrote. “But NOW there is no excuse for you all. Both genders. The information is there.”
I want to add that I personally believe this is so hard for men to grasp because they are afraid of coming to terms with the fact that they may have violated a woman. however, society has only recently been pushing the importance of consent in every manner.— coffee bae (@iamsashakae) August 30, 2018
so things like coercion, deception, fucking a drunk girl because she drunkenly said yes.. earlier on you probably didn’t know those things were sexual assault because society did not teach us that. but NOW there is no excuse for you all. both genders. the information is there.— coffee bae (@iamsashakae) August 30, 2018
Removing a condom without consent is called “stealthing,” and it’s not legally considered rape. In 2017, Democratic Representatives Ro Khanna and Carolyn Maloney sent a letter to the House Judiciary Committee asking that the abusive behavior be dealt with on a legislative level.
They argued that stealthing is a “violation of trust and dignity between two sexual partners” and emphasized that “nonconsensual condom removal could, in fact, turn consensual sex into nonconsensual sex.”
“Stealthing is sexual assault,” Maloney said. “We need a hearing so that Congress can hear from the experts about how to best address this issue as we continue to amend our country’s and universities’ responses to sexual assault and rape.”