2014-THANKSgiving

10 Benefits to Hauling Kids with You to the Doctor’s Office

68 Comments

ginekolog

I am not a brave mother by any stretch. If I can’t figure out a way to hit an appointment sans the kiddos, I don’t go. Something must be wrong with my 3 1/2 yr. old and my 1 1/2 yr. old because they won’t sit calmly and patiently through an entire dental appointment while the hygienist repeatedly attacks my teeth with the waterpik?

But my carefully crafted plan of maintaining a large toddler-free bubble around any of  Mommy’s appointments was burst last week. Something came up and I had to get to myself to the doctor rather last-minute. With no child care options in sight, I threw the kids in the minivan and we jetted off.

Now I am not saying that I’m itching for a repeat, but listen, if you find yourself in these shoes it isn’t ALL bad. Obviously, you will promise yourself the largest glass of welcome-home wine in history if you actually survive the ordeal, but here are a few positives you can focus on while actively restraining yourself from frustratedly beating your head against the wall if you hit up a doctor’s appointment with some little cherubs in tow…

1. You will not get bored in the waiting room. In fact, count chasing the kids around the office as your workout and give Jillian Michaels the day off.

2. If your children are wild enough, the staff may even start to panic that your kids will totally destroy the office and call you back into your appointment more quickly.

3. Forget the scale. Chances are, if you are juggling a large diaper bag, a screaming baby, and toddler who is beelining for the spinny seat at the nurse’s station, you can just give the nurse That Look and get an easy pass on the weigh-in.

4. If this doesn’t happen, you are officially justified in grouchy glaring at the nurse for the rest of the appointment.

5. The doctor will be so shaken by the “energy” of your children, she will probably prescribe whatever the medication you want.

6. Similarly, now is the time to stock up on Ambien. The kids are working hard here to support your claim that “Mommy is tired”. The doctor may even offer up a lifetime IV supply.

7. When the doctor hands you your shiny new prescription, you can just whip out That Look again, and she’ll just quickly send it over to the pharmacy. Not that trolling around Target waiting for it to get filled with two kids who are now way overdue for naptime wouldn’t be super fun…

8. Since WedMD has made you smarter than your doctor, when she suggests coming back in 3 weeks and you don’t think it’s really necessary or feel like fronting another copay, you can just pretend you didn’t hear her because the kids were screaming.

9. When you are swinging through the drive-through to deliver on the promised chicken nuggets you bribed your kids with, you can pick up a treat for yourself and justify it as a matter of convenience.

10. Bragging rights. Go ahead and work it, Momma. Casually drop “When I had my kids with me at the doctor last week…” in conversation as much as possible. You don’t need to mention that it was Hell on Earth. Just saying this will give you major street cred and leave other parents in awe that you actually managed to pull this one off. Heck, even write a blog post about it.

Comments

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  1. 3

    Brit says

    I take both my kids with me to almost every appointment. I ALWAYS take at least one. I don’t really have much childcare options available. It usually isn’t too terrible. I think they are just used to it. (They are 2 years old and 7 months old)

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  2. 7

    Kristen Mae at Abandoning Pretense says

    You definitely earned some bragging rights. I’ve taken mine to many different appointments. One time I had a vaginal exam with my daughter sitting on my chest. *Awesomesauce*

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  3. 9

    Momchalant says

    You’re a brave woman. I wouldn’t dare take my son to the doctor or dentist with me. I tried taking him to a hair appointment once and it was awful.

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  4. 11

    Autumn says

    I always have 3 in tow at every appointment. I have done this now for 13 yrs. I am in and out in 15 mins. They see me walk in an they take me straight back no sign in needed…LOL

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  5. 15

    Melissa says

    I had no choice but to take my then 2yr old to my annual pap appointment. He was mortified at what the Dr was doing! He cried the whole time thinking the Dr was hurting me. I think next time I’ll try to leave him at home with daddy.

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    • 16

      Overly Opinionated Mommy says

      I did the same thing last year, Melissa. I took one of his picture books along so that he could look at it. When the doctor started my exam I couldn’t see him, but all of a sudden he was dead silent. I think he was confused as to what my doctor was doing to me. Now that he is 3 1/2 I will for sure be finding child care for him the next time I need a pap appointment.

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      • 17

        Meredith says

        Overly Opinionated Mommy, I can’t even imagine what those little guys must be thinking as they try to figure it out. Godspeed on figuring out childcare for the next one!

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  6. 19

    Kristen Brakeman says

    This totally works to get you out of the office quicker. Especially at the OB/GYN – I always think it’s funny how the office workers at a place with pregnant women especially hate kids!

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  7. 21

    Dani Ryan says

    #2 is my favorite! I always slip in, “is there any way we can get into an exam room a little early so my daughter doesn’t annoy the other patients?” I don’t know that it really speeds things along, but at least it gets us away from the other sick people!

    Loved this post!!!!

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  8. 27

    Elizabeth says

    Haha! Great post. I hate taking the kids with me to appointments! In fact, I knew it was time to stop taking my son with me to my bikini waxing appointments when he was right at 2 years old. He was sitting on my chest/belly and he tried to put his finger in the hot wax on my thigh! Thankfully the girl who does it is my friend and didn’t think much of it!

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  9. 29

    motherunit says

    Great article! Just last weekend, my daughter-in-law said she didn’t want to take her kids car shopping. I advised her how this could work to her advantage. What better way to bargain the price down than saying, “You kids settle down now! Drink your Red Bulls and play with your kazoos! I mean it! Don’t make me count to three!”

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  10. 37

    Jessica Smock says

    I’ve never taken my son to any appointment EVER. Now I’m starting to see the advantages. Interesting. I may have to figure out other ways that I can capitalize on these ideas…

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  11. 39

    Tracy says

    Just saying – I’m down the street if you need me. But, then again, you would have nothing to write about – or worse yet – you could write about the horrible neighbor who offers to babysit and then gives them all kind of candy

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  12. 41

    Robin says

    Go ahead…call me a troll. I work in a doctor’s office; this list will get you nothing but snippy, snide remarks about how disrespectful your kids are, what a crappy parent you are, general disrespect from the staff and a potential dismissal from the office. Speaking for my office, we are far too busy to put up with kids that parents can’t/won’t control, and patients that know better than the doctor. Go ahead….rip me a new one now.

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    • 42

      Meredith says

      Robin, I can only imagine how annoying it would be to put up with all of this from the other side, and I’m sure you get stuff like this all the time. And trust me, I so wish I didn’t have to put any of us through dragging the kids along! I’ll do my best to keep running herd on them to make it as painless as possible and wishing you a day somehow magically free of this kind of junk!

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      • 43

        Robin says

        I certainly understand somethings can’t be helped, a babysitter cancels, something happens last minute that requires a doctors visit, or you just don’t have anyone to watch them. I truly did get some of the humor, I promise. My point that I was attempting to make is that generally speaking was that parents that attempt to parent their kids and are courteous to the office staff get treated far better than the parents that have an “anything goes attitude”. I also understand that kids can just be plain assholes on any given day. I will make one last observation: if you want the script for Ambien attempt to control the kids and then give the doctor the frazzled look.

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  13. 45

    Emily says

    Loved this…I used to say that I caused a scene with my 3 boys no matter where I took them. I used to avoid appointments too, but one time I took them with me to get my hair colored (the gray roots were driving me insane!) and I was in and out of that salon in record time!

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  14. 47

    Amy - Funny is Family says

    Once my kids got old enough to enjoy a cartoon or video game, I have dreaded bringing them to last minute appointments much less. They are sooo well behaved when they are in a cartoon coma!

    Robin, you don’t seem like a troll. You seem like someone who can’t read the tone of a post. We’re having fun here, not planning attacks on the doctors’ offices around the world.

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    • 48

      Meredith says

      Amy, I have heard that a whole new world of sanity opens up when hand-helds come into play. Thanks for sharing the hope, my friend! And you said it so well–just for fun, and never intentionally trying to attack and destroy anyone ;)

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  15. 51

    SCB says

    You don’t need a kid to skip the scales. I once asked a nurse what they did if someone refused to get on the scales, and she said they just noted it on their chart. Sometimes we forget that the doctors and nurses aren’t our parents or the police; they’re people we pay for a service. If you don’t want to be weighed, just say no and get on with it.

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    • 52

      Meredith says

      SCB, good to know. So funny, because I think I do see them as the police in my head. Probably best for me to get on that scale though–a good check for me from keeping those yoga pants expanding too much!

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