Baby Must Haves

Jill Smokler, AKA Scary Mommy

Jill Smokler, AKA Scary Mommy

What started as an innocent on-line baby book to chronicle Jill's stay-at-home days with her children, (Lily, Ben, and Evan) quickly transformed into a vibrant community of parents, brought together by a common theme: Parenting doesn’t have to be perfect. Learn more here.
Jill Smokler, AKA Scary Mommy

@scarymommy

NYT bestselling author of Confessions of a Scary Mommy and Motherhood Comes Naturally (And Other Vicious Lies). Fond of curse words, sarcasm and Diet Coke.
Just stood in line behind someone at Target whose grand total was nine dollars. How is that even possible? - 1 hour ago
Jill Smokler, AKA Scary Mommy
Jill Smokler, AKA Scary Mommy

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Baby Must Haves You Don't Really Need

 

Wondering what baby must haves you really need? Turns out not too many. Forget about silly luxuries like wipe warmers and baby music, my kids survived, no, thrived, without the basics. Turns out, you really don’t need any of those things you registered for, after all. Baby must haves? Snort.

 

 

1. Bibs. I’m not sure why, probably pure laziness, but I can count on one hand the number of times my children donned protective gear while eating. And, they were not clean eaters. They just wore a lot of horribly stained clothes.

 

2. Changing Table. We owned a changing table with Lily, but I never used it. Instead, we changed diapers on the kitchen counter. I set up the diapers and wipes in a kitchen cabinet and slapped a towel on the perfectly tall counter. It was convenient and much easier than schlepping up the stairs every half hour. Who has the energy for that?

 

3. Diaper Pail. The Diaper Genie? What a crock! We registered for one, but the second I discovered that it required specially designed liners it was outta there. Who wants wrapped up shit sitting in a nursery, anyway? Whether you can smell it or not is besides the point- it’s nasty! A plastic wastebasket and whole bunch of plastic grocery bags did the trick perfectly, thank you very much.

 

4. Baby Bath. Why mess with a big plastic thing when you can just stick them in the sink? With my second two, I just lined the kitchen sink with a towel and plopped them right in. Clearly, I tried to climb the stairs as little as possible.

 

5. Baby Laundry Detergent. Tide free is the same thing, at half the price. 

 

6. Diaper Bag. Pre-children, I once mistook a diaper bag for a laptop carrier. The changing pad made a nice little computer wrapper and all of the compartments were perfect for storing my pens and sunglasses. Once I had children, though, I simply bought over-sized bags and threw all of my crap in them. Having a mom car was bad enough, I refused to sacrifice my choice in bags.

 

7. Burp Cloths. When I thought of it, I would occasionally grab a dishtowel and throw it over my shoulder, but most times I would simply walk around with a perma-stain on my shoulder.

 

8. Bottle Warmers. We bottle fed the kids and simply never thought to warm the water for our poor winter babies. It was an extra step and middle of the night feedings were hard enough. It horrified both of our mothers, and in retrospect, I can see why.

 

9. Baby Shoes. You know their feet will never touch the ground, right?

 

10. Blankets. We were given and bought countless blankets for each baby, but you aren’t supposed to put blankets in cribs anyway, so what’s the point?

 

I think it’s safe to say that all you really need is diapers, wipes, and a way to feed the baby and clothe the baby. Everything else is really unnecessary. Plus a whole lot of love, of course. And a strong gag reflex always helps.

Around the web

{ 111 comments… read them below or add one }

1 From Belgium April 19, 2010 at 8:05 am

Babies themselves seem to think that they don’t require socks (at least mine does, she tries to feed them to the cat), so perhaps we should all rethink the babysock status as a must have.

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2 Smores for Breakfast April 19, 2010 at 8:09 am

ha! what about wipe warmers? So the room temperature wipe can get warmed up to soothe the baby’s behind while wiping the poop away. I DONT THINK SO! I think the wipe warmer is the biggest crock around!

xo
Alexis

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3 LoveFeast Table April 19, 2010 at 8:36 am

Wipe warmer pinch…throw a few in the microwave! I totally agree…by the time I hit number 5, I was lucky if I had a diaper stashed under a seat in the car! The less I could get away with, the better!
.-= LoveFeast Table´s last blog ..Fancy Friday Dishes =-.

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4 Kelli April 19, 2010 at 8:37 am

You just made me laugh so hard and feel so much better about my baby coming in August. It’s overwhelming – all the STUFF!
.-= Kelli´s last blog ..10: 64/326 =-.

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5 Cindy S April 19, 2010 at 8:40 am

So with you on all of it but ESPECIALLY the diaper genie idea. Gross. My youngest son’s armoire is jammed full of plastic bags. Safe to stock a toddler’s room with plastic bags? Perhaps not. But I’ll be damned if it’s going to smell like poop in there.

Screw the environment, Mr. Grocery Bagger, I need those plastic bags!
.-= Cindy S´s last blog ..That’s What She Said. =-.

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6 Jessica April 19, 2010 at 8:43 am

I was one of those moms who was over-prepared for the birth of my child and didn’t use half of the stuff! Instead, I just got a backache from carrying all the extra junk in my diaper bag! My husband still gets on my case about my bag being overstuffed and constantly says “do you really need all that”.

Here’s my list of 10 useless baby products. http://bit.ly/9Nmsb2
.-= Jessica´s last blog ..eBay Photos and Videos =-.

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7 Brit April 19, 2010 at 8:55 am

Ohhhh I love the sleep nest! My best friend is 2 month away from her due date and I’m sure she’d love it too!
.-= Brit´s last blog ..A Surprise =-.

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8 Brit April 19, 2010 at 8:57 am

Also, I really have no input since I don’t have any kids or any kids coming yet … but I think have the crap – especially the covering the cart cloth thing – is absolutely ridiculous.
.-= Brit´s last blog ..A Surprise =-.

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9 WebSavvyMom April 19, 2010 at 8:58 am

–>I didn’t have a lot of gear but definitely needed the burb cloths. My son spit up at least 10 times a day til he was nine months old. Then one day, it just stopped and I found my smile AND nice tops.
.-= WebSavvyMom´s last blog ..Flashback Friday (Part 53) – Flying Saucers =-.

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10 Rachel April 19, 2010 at 9:10 am

Oh, I could have written this myself! I, too, forgot a diaper once at the pediatrician’s office. Lucky for me (or for the baby, I guess) they DID have an extra. I’ve never used bibs (what’s the point, they still get food all over their sleeves!) and I currently don’t have a diaper genie, changing table, or a diaper bag and, in fact, my baby doesn’t even have a nursery. I do, however, have a shitload of burpcloths. Thank god.
.-= Rachel´s last blog ..Murphy’s Mama’s Law #14 =-.

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11 Jennifer April 19, 2010 at 9:21 am

The sleep nest is the cutest :) I agree on the excess amount of “things” people think you need to raise a baby!!

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12 Kmama April 19, 2010 at 9:39 am

That sleep nest is super cute.

I have to say, I didn’t use half of the baby stuff I got, but I did use a lot more than you! LOL
.-= Kmama´s last blog ..FoodShouldTasteGood: A Review & Giveaway =-.

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13 C @ Kid Things April 19, 2010 at 9:47 am

I completely agree with this. A baby needs very little, most of it is unnecessary, but can be useful, wants.
.-= C @ Kid Things´s last blog ..Syrup and Sappy =-.

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14 Kristen April 19, 2010 at 9:56 am

I *thought* my newborn days were behind me, turns out, not so much.
I believe I know what I need and don’t need this go around.
However, I will be looking for a wipe warmer on craig’s list, ’cause, dude, have you ever wiped your throbbing ‘roids with a warm wipe? As close to lux as you can get with an achin’ ass.
But otherwise this baby is gonna be lo-fi.

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15 Marylin April 19, 2010 at 9:57 am

I had one of those nappy pails when my oldest was little, and it was a godsend as we lived in a flat, but I didn’t use it second time around (the then-toddler zack broke it) and got on just fine! When my next lil one comes along (ttc at the mo!) I doubt I’ll get one!
Also had a changing table, which was awesome for us (cause of living in a flat), but had to give it back to my brother when they were expecting their 2nd. I *would* like to get one of them, but as there are stairs in our house I doubt it’d be used that often, though it made bathing the baby muuuuch easier!
I love the muslin cloths, used them all the time – they were burp cloths and bibs rolled into one, and so damn cheap it didn’t matter if they got so manky I couldn’t get the stains out and had to chuck them! ;)
.-= Marylin´s last blog ..Too much fun for blogging! =-.

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16 Amy Bliss April 19, 2010 at 9:59 am

I too am guilty of this. Even now, when I have a 3.5 year old… I need to keep a change of clothes with me at all times for him, as well as a pull up or two. he’s potty trained, but there are still the occasional accidents. The backpack we use for him is always primed and ready, but I often forget it.. LOL

I’d love that thing for my best friend, btw. She just found out she’s pregnant, very unexpectedly. She was done having kids and got a surprise! They have nothing at all anymore. :)

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17 beth shelton April 19, 2010 at 9:59 am

My daughter got warmed bottles. By the time my son came, he got what he got and liked it! No diaper pails. Swear by a and D ointment!!

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18 erica April 19, 2010 at 10:01 am

I am a firm believer that new moms need Mylicon, those gas drops. I vividly remember being at home alone with a wailing baby all day before my friend said, “Hey, have you tried Mylicon?” I was like…”Myli-wha????”

I sent my hubs for those drops and Bam! Instant fart from babes and crying fit over.

I cringe when I see “wipe warmer” on a registry… oh, they just don’t know…
.-= erica´s last blog ..By: e =-.

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19 Debbie C April 19, 2010 at 10:01 am

Love it! So true!

I remember a middle of the night feeding session with my now 5 year old.

I was scooping the formula in, got distracted and nearly gave him a scoop of instant coffee instead. Would have made for an interesting night ……

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20 Cory April 19, 2010 at 10:03 am

I was a nanny for 3 little boys for over a year and let me tell you… the only thing they cared about was if I had a snack in my bag.. didn’t matter if the snack was warm or cold, just a snack.. and as for these fancy cribs and pack and plays – who needs em.. if you just sleep WITH baby you both stay warm and comfy :-)

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21 Michele - The Professional Family Manager April 19, 2010 at 10:04 am

What did women who lived in the colonies or traveled out west or live during the renaissance do? Certainly not nearly the things we do for our own children now…and, yet, mankind survived.

So while I certainly would not like to go through childbirth during the middle ages, I also think that most of the things we are told we “need” for our children is a complete and utter waste. Yes, you need a car seat, and, yes, you need clothes and diapers…but, beyond that, you can change a kid on a floor or a bed or a kitchen counter; you can bathe a baby in a sink; and you can keep baby supplies in anything. When I had my kids I had very few things for them because I just didn’t want to waste the money and have the clutter around my house, and people actually felt sorry for me.

I will confess to having one non-essential that saved me–the baby swing. With all three, I could put a cranky baby in it, they’d fall asleep, and I could actually brush my teeth or do something for fifteen minutes. That thing was definitely worth it to me.
.-= Michele – The Professional Family Manager´s last blog ..Are Bloggers Starving Artists? (Revisiting the Question) =-.

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22 Michele - The Professional Family Manager April 19, 2010 at 10:07 am

Oh, and one more thing…who the heck decided that mothers should carry bags with teddy bears or Loony Tunes or some other childish thing? The bag is for the mother, not the kid–what makes anyone think that any adult wants to carry anything in one of those things? I like my dignity, thank you very much. I used a solid black tote from Land’s End that later doubled as my gym bag. It worked just as well as the pink bunny ones.
.-= Michele – The Professional Family Manager´s last blog ..Are Bloggers Starving Artists? (Revisiting the Question) =-.

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23 Sarah April 19, 2010 at 10:08 am

I thought I was the only one that used a counter instead of a changing table. I didn’t even have one until my second and then it was because I needed a place to store his clothes. My friend gave me a bunch of her baby stuff including a wipes warmer which I used to warm up wax strips so I can wax my chin quickly.
The only extravagant baby item I would buy again if I had to would be an arm’s reach cocoon. It was worth every penny to have two of my kids sleep through the night the first week home.
.-= Sarah´s last blog ..The Tactless Wonder, a One Woman Show =-.

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24 Brittany at Mommy Words April 19, 2010 at 10:09 am

I am with you – you need to be able to do all the things these products do (except warm bottles or wipes) but you can accomplish all this without special stuff for babies. A dishtowel is a burp cloth is it not? A big purse can hold a dipaer just as well as a special other bag. Still, a lot of new moms, like a lot of new brides, love the registering and the thoughts of all that little stuff. I wish I had used it all with my first – but sadly – nope!

And like you, I had no spare diapers but thank God my ped did!

LOVE the sleep sack. It is precious!
.-= Brittany at Mommy Words´s last blog ..Should I Be Worried? =-.

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25 Domesticated Gal April 19, 2010 at 10:10 am

Why do I find out about all the cool stuff AFTER my kid outgrows it? The deedee thingy looks so much more comfy than the snowsuit I wrapped my kid in to keep him warm…

And I totally forgot the diaper bag on our first baby doc visit too. As did my husband. Who is a family doc. And should know these things.
.-= Domesticated Gal´s last blog ..Baker’s Dozen Just Means I Can’t Do Math =-.

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26 Melodramommy April 19, 2010 at 10:15 am

It’s so funny the way things change between baby 1 and baby 2. For baby 1 I would have lugged around the playpen to the grocery store just to be safe. For baby 2, I’ve been so unprepared as to have had to stop at a gas station in the middle of nowhere searching for a clean diaper to discover their only selection was a dusty box of unwrapped diapers, one that had a tick on it! So yes, baby sat in a dirty diaper for the rest of that road trip as mommy listened to screaming. Hopefully I’ll figure it out, that happy medium, by the time they go to college. P.S. what cute photos!
.-= Melodramommy´s last blog ..Crazy Things All in the Name of Potty Training! =-.

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27 Tonya April 19, 2010 at 10:15 am

Oh wow I just love this post!!!
I am 28 and pregnant with my first!!I’m a very new mom 8 weeks 5 days today!!!! Boy do I remember what my mom went through my brother with some of these same examples hehe. We are 10 years apart. What creative ways you can come up with…I just wanted to thank you for the similar idea. I’m going to be a single mom living with the father in a small 1 bedroom apartment. We are turning one of our big closets into the baby area…poor kid but it will work!!!

Thanks for the great read you crack me up!

Tonya.

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28 Hannah @A Mother in Israel April 19, 2010 at 10:17 am

I wrote something similar a couple of years ago. Agree about the stains–I’m the kind of person people recommend stain cleaner to. I also refused to buy wipes with my younger kids–either rinsed them off in the sink, or used a wet washcloth. I tucked one into a plastic bag when going out. I used cloth diapers anyway. http://www.amotherinisrael.com/2006/09/29/how-to-spend-virtually-nothing-when-you-have-a-baby/

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29 rella12 April 19, 2010 at 10:24 am

I had all of the gadgets and gizmos for baby #1 and got rid of all of it by the time baby #2 came. Our pediatrician has diapers, but will not let you dispose of the dirty one in their office so I had to stow the poopy diaper (no plastic bag- ew) in my bag until I could find a trash can out of the building. I don’t blame them for not wanting their offices to smell like poop, but come on….

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30 Amanda Warners April 19, 2010 at 10:24 am

Change the boobs out for the bottles, and you never need a warmer. ;)

Great list, very realistic and honest.

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31 Erin Im Gonna Kill Him April 19, 2010 at 10:34 am

Ha ha, you thought a diaper bag was a laptop case. Spoken like a true writer. We raised our kids the same. And, in some ways, we did OURSELVES a favor. I know women who cannot leave the house without an arsenal of products and implements. They’ve made it impossible to go to the park, much less a vacation. Get by on less, I say.

I’ve been seen offering strangers 5 bucks for a Pamper.

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32 Denise April 19, 2010 at 10:38 am

I wish I knew about the Dee Dee when my nephew was young enough to use it.

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33 Liz April 19, 2010 at 10:41 am

I forgot to bring an outfit or even a blanket to the hospital when my fourth was born. Yes, it was the 4th time. The nurse felt bad and let me take a blanket, but made it very clear that she was not supposed to.

It was the hospital where my husband works as a physician resident.

Priorities are so fun to realize, sometimes.
.-= Liz´s last blog ..OUR CHOICES AND OUR VALUES =-.

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34 tracey April 19, 2010 at 10:43 am

Basically, you just need lots and lots of patience to have a baby. And someone to let you take a break to get some sleep. Everything else is just icing.
.-= tracey´s last blog ..Are you ready for some soccer? =-.

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35 Caitlin April 19, 2010 at 11:03 am

Oh this made me laugh out loud! I am super prepared 95% of the time but there have definitely been times when Bink had nothing to eat, no bib to wear, no socks (since he’d thrown them off and I hadn’t packed a spare).
.-= Caitlin´s last blog ..Binky’s Birthday Bonanza! =-.

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36 NotJustAnotherJen April 19, 2010 at 11:23 am

I remember when a dear friend of mine asked me to help her pick out her diaper bag. She had a gift card to one of those ultra-trendy, very cute bag companies. I couldn’t really help her, I always opted for a back pack (we lived in San Francisco at the time and I was schlepping a baby around on the public transportation, it worked best). After about 3 months in with her fab bag, she let me know that the backpack from Target was a lot more functional. We still laugh over that.
.-= NotJustAnotherJen´s last blog ..clueless parent prayer =-.

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37 Dana April 19, 2010 at 11:50 am

Thanks for this post – I’ve forwarded it onto a few friends who are pregnant with baby #1. I hope to have kids in the next few years, and so this is so refreshing knowing that kids will live without the latest and greatest technology contraption thingy.

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38 Mary April 19, 2010 at 11:52 am

As a new first time mom, the best compliment I have gotten thus far is that I’m the most relaxed first time mom anyone had seen (from my aunts at the “meet the baby” party they threw us). I always laugh when we visit friends and see all of the things my little girl is “deprived” of. She is surviving just fine with cold (reusable) wipes, her hand-me down clothes and sleep sacks, my boobs, and her cloth diapers. Although we do use burp cloths or we’d all have to change 30 times a day (reflux). We do love our sleep sacks though and this nest looks like fun!

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39 Jennifer April 19, 2010 at 11:55 am

I never warmed bottles either. Room temp worked just fine for us.
.-= Jennifer´s last blog ..And then sometimes we learn from them. =-.

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40 MamaOtwins+1 April 19, 2010 at 11:59 am

I think that is why I had twins first. To throw me into a thick of it all at once. I couldn’t choose a diaper bag, I had to find the biggest monstrosity out there just to make it out of the house. Of course bibs where worthless, lots of stained clothes, when feeding two kids who has time for bibs!
.-= MamaOtwins+1´s last blog ..FFC: Going Green from Paper to Cloth =-.

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41 Liz @ Peace, Love & Guacamole April 19, 2010 at 12:42 pm

Great post…I’m totally with you! Other un-necessities: baby toys. Why buy a $10 toy when babies are content to chew on a tupperware lid?
.-= Liz @ Peace, Love & Guacamole´s last blog ..Eyesore? =-.

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42 Southern Belle Mama April 19, 2010 at 12:57 pm

This is the first time I’ve seen the deedee sleep nest…it looks awesome! Too bad I didn’t find it with my first two, but I’d love to win it for No. 3 one day!

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43 thepsychobabble April 19, 2010 at 1:41 pm

That? is awesome looking. And while my baby days are (fingers crossed) over too, my sister is pregnant again:)
.-= thepsychobabble´s last blog ..Badgers and Panic =-.

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44 S Club Mama April 19, 2010 at 1:42 pm

I never warmed Tristan’s diapers – have to with Isaac (he won’t eat a cold bottle). What’s the big deal anyway? It’s not like they won’t drink cold milk forever after this.
I used to climb stairs with Tristan to change his diaper; so sorry I did that. Now we’re on one level (thank goodness). We bathed them in the sink too (you were smart with the towel, we just put ‘em in there). Isaac pooped in our sink the first week he was home – gross.
Agreed with “smores for breakfast” wipes warmers are dumb.
My friend has a sort of diaper genie that you don’t have to have special bags for. I want one of those. Walmart bags are just not doing the job – stinky!
.-= S Club Mama´s last blog ..Monday Meanderings =-.

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45 Amy April 19, 2010 at 1:43 pm

I couldn’t agree more. I would add “shoes” to the list as well. I had a couple of pairs of shoes for my son that were impossible to get on his hot, fisted up infant feet yet, ironically, would drop off the second you picked him up.

I have a list of the top 10 baby gifts I received (and actually used) here: http://bit.ly/8Ytgvh

Amy
pregnantchicken.com

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46 Heidi April 19, 2010 at 1:52 pm

Couldn’t agree more! I was definitely over-prepared with my first (now 19.5 months) and I didn’t have half the stuff you mentioned. Knowing now how little one needs to care for a newborn (and how time consuming each of these “convenient” doo-dads really are) I wouldn’t buy any of these items. Spit-up is the least of the bodily fluids that will end up one us mommies. With number two due to arrive in 8 weeks I couldn’t be less prepared and more calm about it. Thanks for the post. Loved it.

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47 Melissa April 19, 2010 at 2:11 pm

Wow, so agree with all you have. I have so much crap that I bought that I never used. I never had a Diaper Genie and never needed one. Those suckers go to the outside garbage ASAP anyway, with – as you say – a handy grocery store bag to carry them in.

The only thing I would not do is change the diaper on the kitchen counter. Only because one of our little guys had a fall at 3 months which led to a skull fracture and subdural hematoma, so I’m a bit weird about things like that.

I love, love, love the baby duvet you are giving away! I wish I would have thought of it as well. lol. What a great idea! Almost makes me want to have another. Not really, but it’s awfully cute and cozy looking.
.-= Melissa´s last blog ..William the Artiste =-.

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48 christy April 19, 2010 at 2:20 pm

How I wish I had a strong gag reflex – I almost throw up all the freaking time! And I love that I’m not the only mom who didn’t bring diapers to the first dr appt. This time around, I will! (Can you believe I’m having this baby TOMORROW?!!! I can’t!!!) See you this summer!!!!!

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49 Keyona April 19, 2010 at 2:29 pm

You are hilarious! Some of those things I had, some I didn’t. It’s funny because I just has my Shower on Saturday and people bought me all those things I didn’t have with my first. We’ll see how it goes! :)
.-= Keyona´s last blog ..The Baby Shower =-.

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50 Stacia April 19, 2010 at 2:54 pm

Baby Three is due imminently, and we realized this time around we don’t even need a bag. Husband is just going to stuff a couple of onesies in his pocket … I mean, the hospital will give us diapers. So we’re good to go!
.-= Stacia´s last blog ..Us and Them =-.

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51 june April 19, 2010 at 3:00 pm

amen, sister. there is certainly a lot of baby stuff floating around that’s not neccessary. some of the best advice we’ve ever gotten was to not use a changing table – and the floor has been so useful ever since then :)
.-= june´s last blog ..A little creepy… =-.

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52 Allison April 19, 2010 at 3:03 pm

I hardly ever use a bid either. In fact, most of the time it doesn’t occur to me unless one of the grandmas says something. And yes, I’ve been caught in public, without a diaper, with a kiddo who just pooped. Really pooped. Rotten egg-smelling poop. That’s the moment they will talk about when I get my mom-of-the-year award.
.-= Allison´s last blog ..Little Known Ways to Prevent Diabetes with Fitness – guest post =-.

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53 IASoupMama April 19, 2010 at 4:08 pm

Hahaha! Great posting. Here I thought I was an oddball because I never had a bib or burp cloth around… Everyone looks at me like I have three heads when I’d feed my kids without a bib. What can I say? They were piglets who wouldn’t waste a crumb of food by letting it miss their mouths… And neither was a spitter, so when they did spit every third month, I was at a loss because I stopped carrying burp cloths. My son took a bottle at any temperature, my daughter simply refused a bottle. So, yeah, she was attached to my boob her entire first year. No wonder I’m amazed when I see her pretty little face — all I saw was the top of her head for a year…
.-= IASoupMama´s last blog ..Getting My Revenge =-.

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54 Beth April 19, 2010 at 4:57 pm

My husband laughs at me when I cram every baby item I can into my normal sized purse. People are amazed at the things I can pull out of there. I call it my Mary Poppins bag. I hate carrying a diaper bag. It’s awkward and so not cute.

And amen on the tub. I was told I had to register for it, and being a first time mom and not knowing what the heck I needed, I made sure I got it. After trying to bathe a screaming baby in it twice, I moved on to the sink and never looked back. Now she loves bath time and I don’t have to haul the awkward thing out. Instead, it sits quietly in her closet while I debate whether or not I should just give it away. I mean, she might like it one day.

P.S. I would love to win a giveaway!

My blog: http://bethispregnant.blogspot.com
.-= Beth´s last blog ..Boy or Girl? =-.

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55 Lanita @ A Mother's Hood April 19, 2010 at 5:36 pm

I was a major low maintenance mom. Never owned a diaper bag, rarely carried around spares of anything. My kids survived, but I can always tell a new mom, besides the the size of her child, she is carrying the kitchen sink with her. Actually, she is carrying the child and the husband is carrying the kitchen sink. Scary.
.-= Lanita @ A Mother’s Hood´s last blog ..Danger Lurks Beneath =-.

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56 amber April 19, 2010 at 5:49 pm

Occasionally I remember to put a bib on mine, but I’m with you in the horribly stained clothing department. Right now, she is wearing lemonade, chocolate, sandbox dirt, dirt-dirt and a whole lot o snot.

I figure, if she’s dirty, there’s less chance anybody will want to steal her, right?
.-= amber´s last blog ..True Love: The Dessert Edition. =-.

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57 kc April 19, 2010 at 6:31 pm

Perfect timing for the list and giveaway, I am sitting here reading deals/blogs with my 1 week old son nestled up on my chest, snoozing away! :-)

I am with ya on the bottle warmers, although we live in AZ, so maybe it wasn’t so bad. My little guy had no trouble with cold milk.

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58 angie April 19, 2010 at 7:52 pm

I knew we were 2 peas in one pod and just didn’t know it. Twins separated at birth, perhaps? Because I could have written this post……..I was always unprepared, yet somehow, we survived. :)
.-= angie´s last blog ..I’m Back! =-.

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59 Mom2Miles April 19, 2010 at 8:12 pm

I’m on my second baby so you think I’d know everything by now, but I am constantly finding out about new baby gear & gizmos. Why, just today I saw a mom with a special bottle propper-upper. Who knew they even made those?!

Most of the stuff you can live without (I agree the diaper pail’s a waste) but some stuff is genius. Like the Snack Trap and those disposable self-stick place mats. And also the UPF 50+ stroller canopy extender. And pacifier clips. And Babylegs. OK, I’ll stop now.
.-= Mom2Miles´s last blog ..Lazy Saturday =-.

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60 Mare April 19, 2010 at 8:57 pm

This post is awesome! It’s funny how many things we register for and then realize that we don’t even really need them. That sleep nest looks amazing!

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61 guarros April 19, 2010 at 10:35 pm

What’s with the mounds of baby wash clothes? Do grown up wash clothes not work just the same? And how many sets does one baby / family need? It’s like with each kitchy present we got, we got a matching wash cloth set. I wasn’t going to do a give away – but hey – if you are in need of small square of cloth – I’m your girl.
.-= guarros´s last blog ..Dr. Doogie (Doom) & How I Almost Cut a B =-.

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62 Naomi April 19, 2010 at 11:11 pm

OMG, thank you! You just made me laugh out loud!! that was too funny! In particular, I loved the laptop-carrier-cum-diaper-bag. I must say, I’ve wrapped my laptop up in the fold out change pad more than I’ve used it to lay my precious baby on! When she’s lucky, i remember to use one of those disposable huggies things so she’s not lying on something too grimmy (that is if I actually have a clean one on me!), but most times, when we’re out she’s changed on just about any surface.

Oh and don’t get me started on burp cloths! I’m sure they’re handy, but rarely are they around when needed, so sleeves, pants, hands, stuffed animals…you name it, everything but the burp cloth is used.

Thanks for the chuckle!
.-= Naomi´s last blog ..The plight of the toy filled home =-.

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63 Natasha April 19, 2010 at 11:34 pm

wow when you put it like that it all really is unnecessary. Whenever I go out I do carry a bag with wipes, nappies and clothes. I’ve just gotten rid of the big change table, what’s wrong with the bed? And I use the sink for my girls. Yes they are alive..

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64 Carrie April 20, 2010 at 12:14 am

HA, I loved this!! Mainly because I just went to a baby shower the other day, and saw so much that I know she’ll never use. I have a 6 month old and 3 yr old and am completely low maintanance with them. Both my kids drank/drink room temp formula, never had a warmed wipe, and I travel with next to nothing, lol. So much unneccessary expense – all babies really need is love, diapers, feeding supplies, a safe place to sleep, and a few versatile pieces of clothing!

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65 cheri April 20, 2010 at 1:33 am

in the philippines, only the rich have changing tables and diaper genies. we changed diapers on the bed (or any flat surface, just spread a towel before laying down the baby) and dumped the dirty diaper in a plastic bag. serves its purpose.
.-= cheri´s last blog ..2 Q’s and a Yay! =-.

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66 subWOW April 20, 2010 at 2:32 am

So true!
.-= subWOW´s last blog ..Interview with my child: “Why I don’t like blogs” =-.

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67 This Mama Works It! April 20, 2010 at 7:10 am

I think I would add the Baby Bjorn. I don’t think I could have survived without it. In fact every baby shower I go to I always buy it for the new mamma.
.-= This Mama Works It!´s last blog ..Big Crumbs Cash Back Program Review ~ Take a Look At My Earnings So Far =-.

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68 Lindsay @ Just My Blog April 20, 2010 at 7:14 am

Oh my goodness. I could have written this post! The only difference is, I had all those things and was sure that they were absolute necessities….Until it came time to use them. I can probably count on my hands the number of times I actually used the changing table…Most of the time it was just done on the floor. And a bottle warmer? HA! My kids drank ‘em room temperature (Thank God) and loved it.
.-= Lindsay @ Just My Blog´s last blog ..Monday Minute: Writer’s Block Edition =-.

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69 E... April 20, 2010 at 8:21 am

I too, was the completely unprepared mom at the newborn visit. Well, actually had a diaper, but not a change of clothes. My son peed EVERYWHERE and got everything soaked. Nice nurse scrounged around and found a cloth of some sort for us to put between him and his wet clothes on the way home. I agree. Why don’t the drs offices have some spares??

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70 The Mommyologist April 20, 2010 at 8:25 am

Oh yeah. The Diaper Genie is the most disgusting thing EVER. We only put pee diapers in there (and ours wasn’t even the genie, it was some generic one or something). Poopy diapers went into those little plastic bags and went straight to the trash in the garage. Of course, our garage stunk like a sewer all the time, but better than the house smelling that way!
.-= The Mommyologist´s last blog ..Celia’s Puppies Book Review =-.

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71 Bonnie April 20, 2010 at 8:46 am

I went into labor at my baby shower. we just put all the presents in the car and left. I didn’t get around to opening anything but the cosleeper for 2 months. My little guy survived just fine.

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72 Jessica - This Is Worthwhile April 20, 2010 at 9:37 am

The two things I couldn’t live without were my boobs. THANK GAWD FOR BOOBS.

(BTW, that baby sleep sack thing is amazing. A glow in the dark zipper!? Wow.)
.-= Jessica – This Is Worthwhile´s last blog ..While the husband’s away =-.

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73 Poppy April 20, 2010 at 10:03 am

The Diaper Genie IS a racket. You have probably passed on this very practical advice to new mothers too and they probably continue to register for all that crazy stuff anyway. When I go to Target or wherever and print out a 6 page registery, I just roll my eyes and pick out what I think they need.

My friends and family kept bugging me to register during my last pregnancy, but I had everything I needed. Being the people pleaser I am I registered for COFFEE and CONDOMS!
.-= Poppy´s last blog ..Boiling Water = Red Lobster =-.

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74 Shannon April 20, 2010 at 10:34 am

Another one here who went to the 1st pediatrician appointment unprepared. I didn’t even take the diaper bag with me… just didn’t occur to me that I might need it. Luckily, my dr did have extra diapers!
.-= Shannon´s last blog ..Table Topics Tuesday: Shop ’til I drop! =-.

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75 healthy kitchen April 20, 2010 at 11:13 am

though i still don’t have kids, this list is quite helpful, now that my sister is having a baby soon.
.-= healthy kitchen´s last blog ..Natural Cures Straight From Your Kitchen =-.

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76 Betsy April 20, 2010 at 12:33 pm

First time- Twins and a Type A Mom (and that should be the name of a blog)

I was the perfect Mom until I wasn’t. The twins hazed me into zone-defense type parenting.

I wish I could shoot myself for all the times I whined, ‘But the book said….” Screw the book. Throw out the diaper bag and hit TJ Maxx for a big-ass bag with a couple of big zipper pockets. Diaper pail? It’s called the trash, which with babies you will be throwing it out every day. Invest in some odor-control tall kitchen bags.

Also, Mini-van are an ugly necessity for those with 2-3+ so get over it. Good News! It also your purse on wheels. Minimize what you schlepp and just use one of those recycle bags or an old beach bag to store diapers, wipes, sunblock, juice boxes, first-aid crap, snacks, and anything else you think you need to make yourself feel better.

Don’t worry about nice- nice will get thrown up, pooped, peed, bleed on just as much (if not more given Murphy’s Law) than good enough.

I could have bought some freak’n amazing PAIRS Louboutins with the money I spent on the stuff I ABSOLUTELY NEEDED (but not really) as a first time mom of twins. You can beg, borrow, recycle, Craiglist, blah, blah, blah . Seriously.
.-= Betsy´s last blog ..Brief follow-up to the best complaint letter ever. =-.

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77 Jack April 20, 2010 at 3:31 pm

Reminds me of one of my BILs. Good guy, but half the time I am surprised that he remembers to bring my sister or nephew with him. He lives on a different planet, but has a very big heart.
.-= Jack´s last blog ..Blog Disappointment =-.

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78 Susie @newdaynewlesson April 20, 2010 at 3:59 pm

I had something similar for my daughter and I loooveeedd it!
.-= Susie @newdaynewlesson´s last blog ..The Kindness Club: Week 2 Prompt =-.

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79 Frugal Vicki April 20, 2010 at 4:16 pm

I have to tell you that I was a super mom when I was brand new, and am now still crazily over prepared, and I did not have half of those items either!
.-= Frugal Vicki´s last blog ..No good name….just P.I.N.T. =-.

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80 maryleigh April 20, 2010 at 4:39 pm

I loved my Vera Bradly Diaper bag that I got with son #3 – I still use it for traveling accessories on big family trips. Then I instead of burp clothes, I just bought some cute Target dish towels, the cute patterned cheese-clothe ones. The best gift I ever got was a cute basket with a liner filled with all sorts of baby-need items, like alcohol (umbellical cord), diaper rash ointment, wipes, thermometer, Tylenol – all those things in one eclectic place! Oh, and I bought a baker’s rack to use for a diaper changing table! Kind of Shabby Chic! If I was going to be immersed in baby stuff, I was going to like the style:)
.-= maryleigh´s last blog ..$1 per Question – what’s it worth to ya! =-.

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81 Michelle April 20, 2010 at 7:58 pm

I concur with most of what you said! Changing a diaper on a kitchen counter even with a towel seems a little hard for me…such a hard surface. As far as the baby deedee, I am guessing it’s because it’s a giveaway that you wish you had one because, seriously, what is the point? I never got those or the Halo sleep sacks. In really cold weather, warm jammies work fine. Plus, my babies slept best when tightly swaddled which you couldn’t do in one of those sleeping bag thingys, but to each their own!

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82 The Wifey April 20, 2010 at 8:49 pm

Hahaha. Omygosh Jill, you are CERTAINLY my kind of mother. Love this and could have written it myself! Great!
.-= The Wifey´s last blog ..No Stupid People Beyond This Point =-.

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83 Faiqa April 20, 2010 at 9:27 pm

Me, too!! I forgot to bring diapers to the pediatrician, too!! I can’t tell you how much better that makes me feel. And, oh, the diaper genie thing, I think you’re being kind calling it a crock. I like to call it a CONSPIRACY. ;-)

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84 Amanda April 20, 2010 at 9:41 pm

As a foster mom, I learned you really don’t “need” much! And it’s a good thing because we didn’t have *anything* the first time they dropped a newborn at our door.

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85 Cranky Sarah April 20, 2010 at 10:37 pm

Let me tell you, you were NOT missing anything with that Diaper Genie. The bags had their own special stink and when combined with baby poo – then PEEYEW! Ours lasted about 3 days before I dragged it out the door, gagging all the way.
I went without most of that stuff, too.
.-= Cranky Sarah´s last blog ..9 years 11 months =-.

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86 Heather of the EO April 20, 2010 at 10:52 pm

This post? golden truth.

Seriously. We didn’t use any of the “must haves.” The diaper genie. Ugh, poop rope. WHY?
.-= Heather of the EO´s last blog ..A picture story: Of Miles and 90 =-.

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87 Fran April 21, 2010 at 6:59 am

Yes, so many necessities aren’t, but I suppose baby registries would be pretty boring if you asked for just the things you really needed. And what would the baby superstores sell if they didn’t convince first-time moms they needed all that junk? Love your post and wouldn’t mind winning that adorable sleeping bag!
.-= Fran´s last blog ..Retinopathy In Premature Babies: Vision Problems Can Last a Lifetime If Not Caught Early =-.

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88 Adventuroo April 21, 2010 at 9:27 am

Oh I have to admit that I have many of those things. However, you’re right. Some ARE a waste. I have to stand by my wipe warmer though! I thought it was a dumb idea at first but after watching my baby squirm and cry over a cold wipe swiping his butt, I’m glad I have toasty wipes for him… at least when we’re at home!

I have been known to ask for a diaper at the doctor’s office though…
.-= Adventuroo´s last blog ..Wordless Wednesday: Calm Among Chaos =-.

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89 angryworkingmom April 21, 2010 at 1:02 pm

All I can say is A-M-E-N sista!!

Dealing with a friend who has has a terrible time having kids and has just had her first. I don’t have the heart to say hey, all of that is a load of crap and buying everything at the baby store may make you “feel” more prepared but most of it is crap that you too will discover when you get down this motherhood path a little further. Nope, don’t have the hear to say that so I sit by quietly while she plugs the portable wipe warmer into her car charger and loads her fold up changer in this giant bag in case her NB takes a shit in the mall…It looked like we were going camping, not shopping, but hey..I’m not saying a word to my ECSTATIC friend with her new beautiful baby!
.-= angryworkingmom´s last blog ..April Fools! =-.

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90 Georgette Gilmore April 21, 2010 at 4:35 pm

I too brought my first born to the pedicatrician’s office without a spare diaper or a blanket. The nurse took off her clothes and diaper and weighed and measured her then told me to re-diaper her and wrap her in a blanket while we waited for the doctor. I was so hormonal, I started tearing up and blubbering to the nurse that I didn’t have anything. I was so worried about keeping this new being alive, I didn’t think about anything else. She gave me a look of pity and came back with a diaper.

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91 Lolli April 21, 2010 at 5:10 pm

I completely agree with you! I got a hideous baby bag with my first (which my husband instantly named the Fag Bag) and eventually ended up just using a back pack or a large purse. And I also ended up stocking a lot less on my person and just kept things in my car. It was so much easier. And diaper genies? Eww!
.-= Lolli´s last blog ..We Give Books =-.

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92 Life with Kaishon April 22, 2010 at 8:58 am

Well, you don’t need to register me either since I can NOT talk Gary into a baby no matter how hard I try. And believe you me, I TRY HARD! I just wanted to agree and say that so much for the junk they are toting now for babies is silly : ). Babies R Us is an insane place filled with so many items no mother really needs! It is crazy! : )
.-= Life with Kaishon´s last blog ..Kids Night Out =-.

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93 Loukia April 22, 2010 at 2:05 pm

I’m not planning on having any more babies but my sister is having her first baby in June! So I’ll enter for her. And great post, by the way. :)
.-= Loukia´s last blog ..The importance of unlearning =-.

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94 Momalom Jen April 22, 2010 at 7:27 pm

Is it just me or is there more and more baby gear every year? Swaddling blankets and a sling were almost more important than diapers in my household. :)
.-= Momalom Jen´s last blog ..Happy Earth Day! =-.

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95 Rachael April 23, 2010 at 1:25 am

Great post. It’s so funny thinking about these things the 2nd time around (my 2nd is due in 2 weeks). We have a changing table this time only because I got it for $10 and it has 2 storage shelves, and since we live in a 2 story house this time I wanted a place to keep diapers/blankets etc downstairs. There’s so much we realized we don’t need this time around, baby bathtub? A towel in the bathtub and only putting in an inch of water works just as well…
.-= Rachael´s last blog ..Wordless Wednesday: HAPPY! =-.

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96 Kori April 23, 2010 at 8:25 am

While my newborn days are over, my daughter is pregnant and that sleep nest is the coolest thing! As for the rest, bah. I have had four and none of them have been irreparably scarred by sleeping in a playpen insted of a crib and being changed on any flat surface handy. I nursed, so the Boppy pillow was MY must have-and after I was finished nursing we all used it for a pillow.
.-= Kori´s last blog ..Coming Out =-.

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97 Krystyn April 23, 2010 at 12:08 pm

You know..some of those were total must haves. My kids were spitters..without the burp rags, I don’t know that I would have ever had a dry shirt!

And, the diaper genie with the diaper sausage it creates? Disgusting.
.-= Krystyn´s last blog ..Sisters, sisters…PSF =-.

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98 Sarah April 26, 2010 at 5:58 pm

This made me lol! Reminds me a lot of myself, especially with the bibs. I feel so bad, but it is like I forget until I am already feeding her and then I am like ‘Well, she is already stained now and if I leave to get one mucho whining will ensue.’

ALSO, I got a diaper genie thinking it would cut down on the smell but it was just the opposite. To empty the thing out I would have to cover my mouth to keep from throwing up.

I tried throwing an air freshener in the bottom, sprinkling that carpet cleaner stuff in with every diaper, and even used a toilet bowl freshener, NOTHING worked! Urgh, I just use those bags for diapers and throw them outside at the end of every day.
.-= Sarah´s last blog ..Fast, Fun Tutu-orial =-.

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99 Jenn of the Roof April 26, 2010 at 9:29 pm

I love going through people’s registries and laughing at all the stuff they think they “need.” What you NEED is someone to stock the hell out of your freezer, a lifetime supply of coffee, and a comfortable rocking chair! All the rest is just extra.
.-= Jenn of the Roof´s last blog ..Off =-.

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100 Natalie @ Hope Springs Eternal April 27, 2010 at 9:49 pm

I tell you what, if I had gotten half as many diapers as I did damn baby blankets I wouldn’t have had to buy a pack ’till my daughter was two. She’s 14 weeks old now and I have so many freaking baby blankets half of them are shoved away in my closet. Oy. Someone bought us 5 boxes of wipes and in my new mom pregnant know-it-allness I informed my husband that we wouldn’t have to buy wipes for a while, at least.

Yeah those 5 boxes maybe lasted a week and a half. The #1 item I recommend to my friends who are expecting is the BOPPY. I use it FOR EVERYTHING.

EVERYTHING.
.-= Natalie @ Hope Springs Eternal´s last blog ..OH MY GOD I AM THE WINNER. =-.

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101 Zak April 28, 2010 at 3:07 pm

Someone gave me a wipe warmer with my second baby. I sold it on Craigslist.

I would not sell the baby deedee, that’s hot. I kinda want to sleep in one. I would give this to my favorite friend who is expecting.
.-= Zak´s last blog ..Looking For A Snowstorm Cocktail? You’re Welcome. =-.

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102 Joanna April 28, 2010 at 8:21 pm

I, too, went to my daughter’s first pediatrician appointment without my diaper bag. Pretty silly seeing as how I spent MONTHS of my pregnancy searching for the perfect diaper bag and filled it up and rearranged all of its contents no less than 10 times before she was born.

I was so concerned about getting out of the house with clothes on and attempting to run a brush through my hair that it never even crossed my mind.

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103 Heather April 28, 2010 at 11:18 pm

A sleep nest sounds like an awesome invention. Sorry you didn’t think of it first. I’d love to win it though! Thanks for “paying it forward”!

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104 Amanda Lickers April 30, 2010 at 5:41 am

When my son was about 6 months old we went to a friends babyshower . He would projectile spit up everywhere so i would always have a back up shirt. So, after comming back from changing my shirt after one big bottle, i walked in on the new grandmother to be ( dads side ) saying to all of her friends ”What is WRONG with these new young mothers these days?? Hasn’t anyone ever told that girl what bibs are for?”.. yes because this young mother is going to keep a bib strapped around a 6 month old for the entire day, oh & because you know when they spit up it never lands anywhere but the bib right?.. i love your blog

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105 Pua April 30, 2010 at 4:53 pm

I can’t remember a single time I used a burp cloth (although I received about two dozen at my baby shower), only just started using a bib during lunches out, and only used a diaper bag maybe for four months. It was too much of a pain in the butt so I just bought a big bag.
.-= Pua´s last blog ..Lunchtime ponderings =-.

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106 Luschka May 2, 2010 at 7:17 pm

We use a gazillion burp cloths a day, but not for burping – for drool! My daughter seems to have been teething since the beginning of time, and she has a constant stream of drool running down her chin. The muslin (burp cloth) is my life saver. Lol. For the rest, pretty much agree with you! The only other thing I bought and never used is a steriliser.
.-= Luschka´s last blog ..Kid Friendly Food – Jelly Pinwheels =-.

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107 Ja'Lee August 28, 2010 at 3:50 pm

Oh how I do love this post. Im a Proud new mommy of a gorgeous two month baby boy named Kasen who I adore. But what I dont adore? Is all of the shit mothers these days think you need for a child. That 150 dollar diaper bag that my son threw up all over? Pointless. 50 $ wipe warmer? Fell off the dresser and the lid broke off. Piece of shit. Disposable changing pads, those stupid Dr. Browns bottles with all of the pieces you have to wash, a Plug in take along in the car bottle warmer, and the 280 baby monitor with the camera that has never even been opened because thanks to my mother Kasen is never in a room by himself, let alone his crib at night, Its all money wasting crap.

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108 Christa April 18, 2011 at 2:48 pm

:) I am 23 weeks with our first and have been surfing the web for just such a list! Too funny! We live in the tiniest sardine can of a home and I am determined to keep our baby registery to the bare minimum. Everyone that asks me what I am needing is quite horrified when they ask me, “So what do you still need?” and I reply, “diapers and wipes”. They look at me like I have three horns and one eye. What can I say? I am the oldest of eight kids and we made do on the bare necessities and lots of love. And then I worked in a daycare and I have a fairly good idea of what qualifies as necessary and what falls in the money-draining categories. So thank you for assuring me that I am not an insane, stingy Momma.

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109 Observacious January 7, 2013 at 1:49 pm

So true, although I quickly became a fan of blankets, at least the thin swaddling/receiving type ones. Those come cheap for three to a pack and can be used for anything: blanket, bib, burp cloth, playmat, rag to clean up spills, nursing cover, sunshade, alternate outfit when you have a diaper blow out in a restaurant and realize you forgot to bring an extra outfit. Anything.
Observacious recently posted..List 26: Schaumburg and other unsexy words

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110 Venassa January 7, 2013 at 1:52 pm

I used bibs like a boss for the first few months of real food. Now that she’s 16 months, bibs are rare, but I will throw them on her when she’s eating something like spaghetti. I also used burp clothes a ton.
And oddly enough, the baby detergent was cheaper than regular anytime I bought it. I loved the smell, so I used it for the first 8 months or so. The rest of the stuff – I had most of it, didn’t use most of it.
Venassa recently posted..10 Things I Did This Week

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111 Zipporah Bird January 7, 2013 at 2:44 pm

I never used bibs, either, but I make gorgeous ones for baby showers. Because I can make them in no time and they cost almost nothing.
Zipporah Bird recently posted..INTERVIEW WITH CAROLINE: “The sad thing about my mom is she has outrun her usefulness.”

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