Install the clamp on the side of the bed of the person who gets their covers stolen — problem solved
If you sleep with a cover hog, prepare to have your prayers answered. One company has seemingly solved the age old problem of cover stealing by inventing a clamp that literally holds on to what’s rightfully yours — 50 percent of the bedding.
Manufacturers of the new Cover Clamp claim their 100 percent guaranteed solution to blanket hogs will have you sleeping better (and warmer) and, let’s be honest, likely prevent future cover wars with your partner when they steal your sheets and blankets every night.
According to the Cover Clamp website, you can either install the clamp’s grip pad under the mattress itself or secure the strap directly to the bed frame if you don’t have a flat surface like a box spring under your bed. The clamp will hold the covers in place at night “even if your partner is pulling with over 30lbs of force.”
This may seem like a lot of force with which to steal covers and though I’d like to blame my husband for our duvet fights in the middle of the night, I am the blanket hog in the house. He likens it to sleeping with someone who’s being attacked by an alligator.
1950: We'll have flying cars
2017: Cover Clamp https://t.co/WsZin0baPb
— Brian Brettschneider (@Climatologist49) October 26, 2017
For a mere $24.99 you can have a more restful night’s sleep and not want to murder your partner in the process. And let’s be honest, you want to save the fighting for more important things, like when your husband can’t find the item he is looking for that’s right in front of his stupid face or pretends to be asleep when he can clearly hear the baby crying in the middle of the night because the baby monitor is on his side of the bed and no human on earth can sleep through that level of shrieking. Or something like that.
The Cover Clamp could also come in handy for families that co-sleep because we all know kids of any age toss and turn like a tiny human tornado. Sure, you may still get kicked in the face or elbowed in the back, but at least you won’t have to fight them for the blankets.
Makers of the Cover Clamp also designed it with a quick release buckle on the clamp so you can easily get in and out of bed. Though it would be fun to tell your boss you can’t make it in because you are literally trapped in bed.
It seems they really have thought of everything.