I lived almost 33 years without eating bacon.
Saying it now, it seems like a crime. It’s simply preposterous! But we didn’t eat bacon in my family. It wasn’t so much for religious reasons — we didn’t keep kosher or anything– it just wasn’t something my parents ever made.
Afraid of the unfamiliar, I spent decades substituting the bacon that accompanied eggs with fruit or toast because “I just don’t like breakfast meats.” Cobb salad with extra avocado, minus the bacon, please. I recoiled when people asked for bacon on sandwiches or burgers. Bacon, schmaken. What was the big deal about this fatty pig meat? Not for me, thank you.
And then my best friend came to visit last week. She likes to spoil us when she’s here and prepared a brunch of Red Pepper Frittata and Brown Sugar-Chili Bacon. I’ll eat the Frittata, I said, but I’m not much of a bacon person. She stared blankly back at me. Have you had bacon? Because you just can’t not like it. It’s pretty much impossible.
Something happened, that June morning, as the bacon sizzled on the stove. The house filled with a sweet and salty aroma that was entirely unfamiliar and I found my mouth watering. Tentatively, I tried a bite, napkin in hand just in case. It was delicious. Like, the best thing ever, delicious. Somehow the entire plate seemed to disappear as I savored each crunchy bite.
Since then, I haven’t stopped thinking of bacon. Bacon in the morning, bacon in the evening, bacon at suppertime. Warm bacon dressing on greens, bacon and spinach quiche and bacon wrapped dates dance in my head. This is what I’ve been missing all these years? What was I thinking?
I know one thing: I have 33 years of bacon free living to make up for. And, I’ll enjoy every bite.
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{ 92 comments }
That made me laugh and laugh and laugh.
I love bacon! Breakfast is just not the same without it!
bacon schmaken let’s call the whole thing off.
according to my husband, bacon should be in its own food group.
alexis recently posted..panty free is the way to be.
Just wait until you get into the gourmet Bacon Chocolate bar- the aptly-titled “Mo’s Bacon Bar” by Vosges (http://www.vosgeschocolate.com/product/bacon_exotic_candy_bar/exotic_candy_bars)
And don’t forget the Bacon Brownies- they can be found on the site “Bacon Today” http://bacontoday.com/bacon-brownies/.
Oh yes my friend. A whole new world.
One that is so wrong, it is oh!-so-right.
Betsy recently posted..Why “Necrotized Tissue” Makes Me Happy
Really?? I’m way intrigued.
….ahhhhh….bacon and chocolate=heaven. Every year during my “to apeshit bake-a-thon” for christmas…..I make SEVERAL batches of bacon fudge…yummo. Another way to enjoy bacon goodness…vanilla bean salt caramel ice cream with bacon sprinkles….. o.O
HAHAHAH!!! You’ve so missed out. This was me when I discovered guacamole after turning my nose at it for 20 years!
Julie recently posted..Design and Picture Post
Same here, Julie! I thought “how could anyone eat GUACAMOLE?” Now I eat it by the spoonful.
Melissa (adventuroo) recently posted..100 Things I’ve Learned About Blogging
No bacon? Does not compute.
We have bacon at least once a week around here. Probably explains a few things. *cough* the size of my ass *cough*
Bacon!! Bacon, bacon, bacon!!!!!!! That shit is delicious. You have SERIOUSLY been missing out! You better step away from the computer and go eat a BLT or something.
Rachel @ Mommy Needs a Vacation recently posted..My Dad
Darn you, I turn vegan and quit bacon and I have to read posts like this… at least I know that all of the bacon I’m NOT eating won’t go to waste. There is balance in the universe again. *sigh*
Anthony from CharismaticKid recently posted..Take the Social Initiative with your Kids! (video)
All is as it should be. I could never give up beef. Chicken, easily. Red meat, never.
Bacon Schmacon! : )
Shoshi isn’t supposed to eat bacon because of his religion. He flipping LOVES bacon. He always asks me before he digs in, “Is this turkey bacon?” and I always so no, and he says “I think it is” and takes a plate.
Sometimes I make bacon as the kids after school snack : ) How funny is that? It is a delicious meat, that is for sure!
Life with Kaishon recently posted..Juan
I had “REAL” bacon today after going the recent years on just turkey bacon.
(Figure that one out. Do they cross breed turkeys and pigs?)
It was so out of this world good. I fell on the floor and stayed there all morning while my husband threw bacon bit after bacon bit in my mouth.
OMG. I love real bacon. I may never go back to gobble gobble-oink oink stuff again.
The Grasshoppa: Triplet Plus Two Momma recently posted..My Man’s Not Perfect
So funny that bacon wz something ur parents never made. The smell of bacon woke us kids, my dad made bacon for us every morning. Some kids walked outta their house with toast, my brothers & I walked out with scrambled egg, potato, bacon & cheese burritos. Bacon is AMAZING ;) Happy Bacon Eating as you catch up on 33 years!!
That must be the best smell ever to wake up to. Who needs Folgers?
mmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm bacon .
Down here in Texas, we have deep fried bacon at the Texas State Fair. Because, you know, bacon isn’t fatty enough in it’s ORIGINAL state, we have to put batter on it and deep fry it in a vat of oil. Yum.
Oh, and don’t forget the chocolate-covered bacon too!
Texan Mama recently posted..My Simple Solution
Someone once told me, and I kid you not, “I would probably eat shit if it were wrapped in bacon.”
Now, I wouldn’t go that far. But by God bacon is a gift from the heavens! Or at least are oinky hooved friends.
Welcome to this salty meaty world!
brianne recently posted..Poetry by Joshua
Im completely shocked!!
Your husband didn’t fuss about no bacon? Enjoy your bacon filled days now =]
Stephanie R recently posted..RoseCreekCottage Giveaway
Nah- we Jews aren’t big bacon people! Oh, the years I’ve wasted.
Did you ever see that Today Show when they made the “Bacon Explosion” TM?
(and that’s a trademark!)
Oh sure, they were months late—my man had seen it online and had taken it to an annual meatfest MONTHS earlier. (of course citing the TM) ;)
Me? I could never have a slice again and be A-OK. Take my doughnuts however, and I will cut someone…
If you really want a fix, the step by step on the Bacon Explosion (TM) that I had to document via blog (as it took TWO people to weave the bacon) is here:
http://twinfatuation.blogspot.com/2009/06/vegans-avert-your-eyes.html
Cheryl recently posted..The Many Facets of Father
No! I need to check it out!!
DH has taught our five year old the rules of the kitchen and Rule #4 is “Everything is better with bacon!”
Don’t forget bacon wrapped scallops, homemade macaroni and cheese with some warm bacon crumbled into it, BLTs on toast, and pasta with bacon, chicken and peas in a creamy sauce. mmmm…..
MommyTime recently posted..To Allowance or Not to Allowance
Literally drooling over here…
Oh honey, I live for bacon. Eat it 3 times a day :)
Kimberly recently posted..Happy Father’s Day
Funny how you can grow up culturally jewish (versus religiously) and still not eat bacon. We kept kosher so I never had it but my many of my friends were like you. They just never ate it mostly because their moms never made it.
I never did get into it (and yes, people are incredulous when I say I never ate it) and I’m a veggie so I don’t eat meat anyway…So that means more bacon for you!
Robin recently posted..Happy Father’s Day!
Like everything that’s really, really, GOOD, bacon can be considered ‘not good’ for you if you overindulge. Cautiously, my friend. Savor. But with a modicum of restraint.
lceel recently posted..Tomorrow, maybe
Oh, yes. I cannot have it in the house. Along with anything else really delicious. Sigh.
Dude. 33 years? No bacon? I weep for you. Now come on over and let me fix you a BLT.
Sara Plays House recently posted..To My Daddy
OK! Can you be here in an hour?
Too funny!! Thought I was the only person that never ‘liked’ bacon…hmmm, until I actually tasted it! Same goes for crab and prawns!
Enjoy catching up on your bacon eating ;-)
Naomi recently posted..Don’t take parenting advice from me
Oh my GOD! Bacon is the bestest. BTW, those little bacon salad bowls, I really really want to make them!
Amber recently posted..Bye Bye Bedtime Boobies
I am a firm believer that bacon can make just about ANY thing better.
Mmmmmm… bacon…
I can’t believe you waited this long to eat bacon!
Shannon recently posted..Everything Austen Challenge Redux
I’m so glad you discovered the magic that is bacon. Because a life without it, is just depressing!
Bacon goes with everything. Seriously. Everything.
You HAVE to try Pioneer Woman’s Fancy Macaroni. DELICIOUS!
Missy recently posted..Friday Feedback
Good Lord, I just looked that up. I’m screwed.
Mmmmmmm…..bacon.
I love me some BLTs!
BlissfulBabe recently posted..It’s Late
My favorite t-shirt ever says *Bacon is a vegetable*.
Hey, I believe it!
My family and my husband’s family are the worst Jews ever, because we all live for bacon. And nothing beats bacon combined with the sweet stuff. My latest favorite is bacon ice cream. Oy vey. It’s heaven, I’m telling you.
So glad you joined us Bacon Lovers! Welcome! But remember – once you go bacon, you never go back…
-Aimee
Aimee @ Ain’t Yo Mama’s Blog recently posted..The Good Dad
Really? Ice cream?? I can’t say it sounds too hot to me, but I’ll try it. I mean, for you.
Welcome to the wonderful world of bacon-living! “Bacon makes everything better.” It does! Now let me know when you are ready for bacon vodka. I made some myself and it tastes gooooooood. esp. in Bloody Mary.
p.s. I have a Jewish friend whose father told them that Bacon does not count as pork. ;-) Indeed. It is of its own class and category.
subWOW recently posted..Dear @Wired. Meet Georgia O’Keeffe.
Ohhhhh. I do love me a good Bloody Mary. YUM.
Just have to jump in here because seriously the bacon vodka must come to blogher and I will make the best bloody EVAH! In my room! *waggles eyebrows*
A Vapid Blonde recently posted..Motor Oil Soap Is Definately Not The Same As Orange Oil Soap
Welcome, sister, we where expecting you.
It’s like you’re born again!
Marinka recently posted..World Cupper
If bacon is wrong, I don’t want to be right.
Bacon is a pig’s way of saying I love you.
Sunday Stilwell recently posted..***All Points Bulletin***
Most of my Jewish friends eat bacon… A few even eat bacon cheeseburgers… So religiously wrong, but so yummy…
They even make bacon salt so you can flavor all your food with bacon!
Beth recently posted..Too Long To Tweet
I was a vegetarian for about a decade until I realized I couldn’t continue resisting bacon. I’ve even had a cupcake with bacon on top (it was a maple cupcake with a smattering of rich fudge on top, so it actually went really well together).
BACON!
MommyNamedApril recently posted..He Smiles Through the Puke. He Must Be a Good Dad.
Oh, you have a lotta livin’ to do! The joys of salty, fatty pig parts!
TheKitchenWitch recently posted..Welcome to my new home!
Dang!! Now I want bacon!!!!
Unbelievable. I adore bacon. I’d marry it if I could.
Have you tried chocolate bacon? Or bacon on ice cream?
Srsly…you have a whole new world to explore.
you totally made an orgasm face with that first bite didn’t you. I demand you eat a BLT and a bacon cheeseburger STAT.
Jen recently posted..Chase – One Year
i’ve always eaten bacon…unless it’s too fatty or not crunchy enough. because then, no matter what, it makes me gag. there, i said it…bacon makes me gag.
oh, in case anyone actually clicks on the link to the post that is displaying here…the password is painintheass
melissa recently posted..Protected: On Taking Over A Job
YES! The one time I did try it it was greasy and fatty and mushy and gag worthy. It’s the crisp that gets me. Soft bacon? Blech.
—>It’s a well known fact that bacon makes EVERYTHING better. If it doesn’t, I’ve yet to figure out what that something is yet.
Bacon! It’s what keeps me from being a vegetarian.
Congratulations, Jill!
Welcome to the dark side. Every time we have bacon, I like to play the What Food Would NOT Go With Bacon game. Everything goes with bacon. I think I would even sprinkle it on vanilla ice cream. Heaven.
Teri recently posted..What Happens In Vegas
Just reading that made me want bacon. Enjoy your new discovery!
Jerseygirl recently posted..Swimming and Other Natural Disasters
Bacon is usually the one thing that keeps people from becoming vegetarians or vegans. Just sayin’.
Jessica – This Is Worthwhile recently posted..Social media interactions: How not to be an asshole
bacon is the fruit of the pig. it’s the meat that brought be back to the dark side of meat eating after 8 years of being vegetarian. it’s a delicious evil ; )
Mmmmm…bacon. Every time I have to fast for blood work my brain and nose gang up on me and play a bacon version of “Where’s Waldo.” I’m telling you, it’s EVERYWHERE when you can’t eat.
(And if it cooked itself, I’d eat some right now. Just because.)
Finally had to sign in and comment because I truly could not imagine a world without bacon! :)
Back is the best. thing. Ever.
really, Jill. It really is.
Priscilla-wheelchair Mommy recently posted..I have a blog badge!
Mazel Tov on your bacon epiphany, I had me some bacon this morning and it was delicious. In case we ever come back into the fold though…here’s something that might tide us over (at least through the high holidays)…it’s kosher! http://www.baconnaise.com/
Yuliya recently posted..Jekyll and Hyde Dog
The best t-shirt I’ve ever seen read “Bacon is meat candy” – I so want one of those!
I can’t believe you’ve never had it before! Thank god for your best friend!!!
christy recently posted..On becoming a mom who wears shorts all summer
33 years with no bacon!!! WOW! I am so glad you finally succumbed and tried it! MMMM, welcome to the dark side Bwah ha ha!
You must have a will of iron, because I can last approximately 33 seconds before bacon is inside my mouth.
Lynn from For Love or Funny recently posted..How to make a summer visor
I blog about bacon more than I should…it makes me sad you went without it for so long. :-)
WOMAN!!! I cannot believe you never had bacon! Bacon is the bottom base of my food pyramid. Like tonight we are having bacon with a side of T-bone steak and corn!
Mariah recently posted..I heart my SMF’s!
Your tongue thanks you and if you’re like me, your hips will not.
Sara — The Football Wife recently posted..Toy Story 4: The Hunt for the Missing Shapes
I’m so glad you have seen the light. Having grown up in a country that doesn’t allow pork products, I, too have been playing catch-up. And it’s been awesome.
ps – this post made me salivate.
I didn’t like bacon until a couple of years ago! But that’s certainly nothing compared to 33 years! Sheesh!
Shelley recently posted..My Mostly Relaxing Weekend!
Now that I butted in up there I will leave a proper comment with all due respect to bacon.
YUUUUUMMMMMYYYYYY.
can. not. live. without.
A Vapid Blonde recently posted..Motor Oil Soap Is Definately Not The Same As Orange Oil Soap
Seriously?? 33 years without bacon?? You were deprived as a child.
Gigi recently posted..Seeing as it’s Father’s Day, I suppose I should post something about Hubby.
Dude. Really?
Like…
I can’t…
Um….
WHAT THE FRIG?
I…
I don’t understand…
It…
Jesus.
I’ll eat a pound of bacon right this second. I can totally see Jess saying that to you, too. You had better thank your lucky stars you have her as a best friend. “Never had bacon.” Pff. Blasphemy.
I did have quite an enjoyable convo recently with the older sister of one of our fellow classmates (think same initials as Jess) about what a sin it was that her kids didn’t get to eat bacon because they’re all Orthodox now.
Welcome to the club. Better late than never.
Danielle recently posted..Well.
After reading this post, I asked hubby which we would rather have for dinner tomorrow night, pork chops or BLT sandwiches. He choose the Bacon Lettuce and Tomato Sandwiches. I’m so glad he did, because I started craving bacon again the minute after I read this. LOL. The power of suggestion.
Welcome to the club!
Making up for 33 yrs sounds deliciously dangerous lol
What is that Bacon-Bowl-Salad- looking creation in that picture? … Did your friend make that for you? Because if she did— she can come visit me anytime!
Corine recently posted..Found My Orange Pride & Becoming A Hooter’s Girl
“Friends are the Bacon Bits in the Salad Bowl of Life.”
Sounds like you have a big juicy chunk of a friend to force you into a whole new way to eat in or out. I’ve got a recipe for a Bacon Strawberry Salad that will make you slap your momma!
Jennifer @ The Mommy Mambo recently posted..Naming Ninety
Okay, you pretty much need to make yourself a plate of spaghetti carbonara RIGHT NOW. It’s bacon’s gift to pasta.
x,
P
adhocmom recently posted..Revisiting the Inappropriate Summer Reading of My Youth
Bacon smells better than it tastes- at least to me.
Jack recently posted..Stuff I Wrote Recently
i CANNOT believe that you’ve never had bacon. what’s not to like? good thing your friend came along and made a convert out of you :)
cheri recently posted..nothing
welcome to the dark side. it’s fun here. but we all have clogged arteries.
Haha exactly: what WERE you thinking? ;)
Bruna recently posted..35 semanas – 35 weeks!
Has your husband started ‘punning’ on your newfound appreciation for ‘bacon’ yet? Those kinds of jokes always make me regret being straight.
Glad you found the other white meat.
Yeah the husband said “I won’t eat pork”. I went right out and got turkey bacon. Problem solved. Me? I’ll eat bacon with bacon sauce in bacon flavoring on slices of bacon. But that’s just me :)
Hilarious. My husband wouldn’t be able to comprehend a life without bacon. He thinks everything is better when pork products are involved.
Kate Coveny Hood recently posted..The Worst Fear Alternatively Titled- Olivers Grandmothers Probably Shouldnt Read This
I should resume my relationship with bacon. We’ve been broken up for a few months but now you made me realize how hot & yummy he is! :)
nycgirl0501 recently posted..Youre Going Places Award
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