It’s the most wonderful time of the year. No, it’s not Christmas. It’s not Mother’s Day. It’s not Amazon Prime Day. It’s better than all of those magical days combined.
Back. To. School.
While summer brings with it a lack of homework and obligations, it also has its own set of difficulties. Namely, hearing your kids say “we’re bored” every half hour or so for over two months and finding wet towels and bathing suits all over the house. By the time the new school year comes around, most parents are shouting for joy, including the funny parents of Twitter.
1. Be sensitive.
Hey southerners, stop depressing everyone with your back to school pictures. It's still August for some of us.
— Lurkin' Mom (@LurkAtHomeMom) August 2, 2017
Us northerners didn’t rub it in when we got to keep our kids in school through late June, did we? OK. Maybe some of us did. Carry on.
2. Time to panic.
We have an emergency! Tomorrow is the first day of school and we don't have a little chalkboard for our kids to hold for the FB photos.
— Simon Holland (@simoncholland) July 31, 2017
We send our thoughts and prayers during this difficult time.
The real reason parents cry on the first day of school is because they're overcome with joy that the soul crushing trauma of summer is over
— Ash (@adult_mom) August 7, 2017
No more screen time guilt? No more popsicle wrappers literally everywhere? No more complaints of “I’m bored?” Damn right, we’re crying tears of joy.
4. All worth it.
Back to school shopping is kinda like Christmas shopping. It's an expensive pain in the ass but it leads to a great celebration.
— Real American Dadass (@R_A_Dadass) August 17, 2017
I do a little jig with every package of new socks and pair of jeans that will sprout a knee hole within a month that I toss into my Target cart.
5. A treasure trove.
My favorite back to school store is under my kids' beds.
— Mary (@AnniemuMary) August 12, 2017
Remember those brand-new underwear you bought at the end of last school year instead of catching up on laundry? Your kid kicked them under the bed and you forgot about them — until now.
6. Almost. There.
Summer break [exactly 35 days] is going [16 hours] just dandy, [39 minutes] thanks [17 seconds] so much [until] for asking [school starts].
— Kim Bongiorno (@LetMeStart) August 1, 2016
Not that we’re keeping track or anything. Just one calendar to X out each day. A few phone alarms. Nothing crazy.
7. Pretty much.
Kid's 1st day Kindergarten –
parent cries, so bittersweet
Kid's 1st day of Third Grade –
parent cries tears of joy because omg finally
— Salty Mermaid (@Jenn_H_Scott) August 10, 2017
When my first kid started kindergarten, I cried tears of sorrow every day for two weeks. When she starts fifth grade in a few weeks, I will throw a party the moment the bus pulls away.
8. So much vodka.
– why every teacher deserves vodka as a back-to-school gift
— Valerie (@ValeeGrrl) September 9, 2016
Keep teachers in your thoughts, y’all. It’s going to be rough.
Don't be sad that school is starting, be happy that everyone in your house managed to survive summer break without strangling each other.
— MyQuestionableLife (@2questionable) August 16, 2017
Made it through another summer and everyone’s alive. Chalk that up as a win.
10. Oh happy day.
I just found out school starts a day sooner than I thought so this must be what walking on sunshine feels like.
— OneFunnyMummy (@OneFunnyMummy) August 10, 2017
Yes. Yes it is.
Happy Back-To-School, parents!