The eclipse is at long last over, everyone. Whether you’re one of the super parents who obtained appropriate eyewear on time for your little angels along with coordinating an eclipse viewing party, or among those of us who didn’t do a damn thing and just told the kids to not look at the damn sun today (slowly raises hand), we have some tweets that are sure to make you giggle.
Like the sun, I, too, know the feeling of my light being blotted out slowly throughout the day. Because kids.
— Mommy Cusses (@mommy_cusses) August 21, 2017
We so feel you, sun. More than you know.
"Can we have snacks?"
– My kids, preparing for the eclipse
— MyQuestionableLife (@2questionable) August 21, 2017
What’s a massive, once-in-several-decades event without some Goldfish crackers and string cheese?
3. They shall never question us again.
10 seconds before the eclipse:
"You better behave. I can make it bedtime IN THE MIDDLE OF THE DAY. Don't believe me? Watch this…"
— Scary Mommy (@ScaryMommy) August 21, 2017
Best. Disciplinary. Threat. EVER.
4. Oh look we missed it.
Parenting bucket list:
Referee while my kids fight through solar eclipse
— Karen Johnson (@21stcenturysahm) August 21, 2017
Tonight the news will report how thousands of parents missed the eclipse because their kids were fighting over the eclipse glasses. Yes, they both had a pair. Yes, they’re the exact same design.
5. So authentic.
I have a solar eclipse every two minutes inside my living room ever since my toddler learned how to open & close the blinds.
— A Bearer Of Dad News (@HomeWithPeanut) August 20, 2017
There’s the light….annnnd dark again. Repeat three thousand times a day.
6. Because of course they did.
Me: Kids, during the eclipse under no circumstances are we to look directly at the sun-
— Bottlerocket (@bottlerocket) August 21, 2017
They don’t listen any other day, why start when their retinas could literally burn otherwise?
7. *shakes head*
5 year old: OH MY GOD! LOOK AT THAT BUG!
— Marlebean (@Marlebean) August 21, 2017
Cool bug, once-in-a-lifetime solar event? Sames.
8. Good call.
Burn your eyes out starring directly at the solar eclipse and you won't even notice the messes your kids make.
— Sara Says Stop (@PetrickSara) August 20, 2017
This would solve a number of problems, really. Gray hairs? Can’t even see them!
9. Fingers crossed.
First day of school + first solar eclipse = I hope my kids are smart enough not to fry their retinas.
— Meredith (@PerfectPending) August 21, 2017
If you need me, I’ll just be chanting incantations that my kids don’t look at the freaking sun today without me there to yell at them not to look at the freaking sun. Totally normal behavior.
10. They literally don’t care.
Can't believe how unimpressed my kids are by the minuscule crescent of light at the bottom of this cereal box.
— spacegirl incognito (@iamspacegirl) August 21, 2017
Just another one of those things parents get all hyped up for that kids can take or leave. Just let them eat the cereal. They’ll be equally enthused.
You're saying this eclipse has a path of totality, huh?
You should see my house after the kids have been home for a few hours.
— Walking Outside (@WalkingOutside) August 21, 2017
Nothing escapes. Not a thing.
12. No pressure or anything.
So let me get this straight — if I fail at these DIY eclipse glasses like I do most crafts, my kids go fuckin blind? Just wanna be prepared
— Valerie (@ValeeGrrl) August 21, 2017
Hope y’all had a great eclipse day!