The Age Old Debate (Can’t we all just get along?)

My day started bright and early with a call that ABC radio wanted to interview me on my stance on political strategist Hilary Rosen’s recent comment that Ann Romney, wife of white house hopeful Mitt, had no business advising her husband on women and the economy, given that she had “never worked a day in her life.”

My first reaction was to laugh at the request. Me? A political pundit? Snort.

But the more I thought about it, I realized this had nothing to do with politics. This was about motherhood, plain and simple. People always say that politics and religion are the two things you never want to a discuss at a dinner party, because the topics are so polarizing and personal. Seems there should be a third topic on that list: motherhood.

Rosen broke this Cardinal Rule of motherhood and now is paying the price in the form of public backlash. I must say that her comments bothered me too, as a card carrying member of the Mommy Club.

Whether or not I agree that Mrs. Romney’s lack of paid work experience precludes her from having a perspective on the economy, I whole-heartedly disagree with the underlying implication behind Rosen’s comments: that stay-at-home-mothering isn’t real work. Motherhood is the hardest job I’ve ever had, and I know I’m not alone.

Romney raised five kids, but because she didn’t get paid, she is accused of having never worked.  Something tells me that with that many sons, Romney worked her ass off. She was a janitor. She was a nurse.  She was a therapist, clown, baker and a chauffeur.  The list could go on all day. I’m sure she wiped more butts at home than she would ever have had to kiss in the workplace. I also suspect that she has at least once in her life had to cut gum out of her own hair or fish a toy out of a dirty toilet. And, she did it for free. Because it was all part of the job.

I don’t know Ann Romney personally, and I know nothing about her parenting. Same goes for Hilary Rosen. What I do know is that pitting stay-at-home-mothers against working moms gains us nothing, and it’s much larger than this most recent spat. So here’s an idea: let’s support one another’s decisions. As mothers everywhere know, there are few decisions as hard as the one we make about whether or not to go back to work.  A mother is a mother, regardless of her employment status, and the last thing you need is another mom judging your decisions. Do what works best for you.  Work or don’t work, breastfeed or don’t breastfeed, circumcise or don’t circumcise, co-sleep or don’t co-sleep. Make the decisions that are best for you, and leave it to the other moms to do the same.

After all, we’ve all been on the receiving end of explosive diarrhea at one time or another. Shouldn’t that bond rather than divide us?

About the writer


What started as an innocent on-line baby book to chronicle Jill Smokler’s stay-at-home days with her children, quickly transformed into a vibrant community of parents, brought together by a common theme: Parenting doesn’t have to be perfect. Welcome to Scary Mommy!


Danielle 3 years ago

Very well said. Not a big Romney fan but this argument holds no merit.

rachel 4 years ago

Being a SAHM has nothing to do with politics,

so what this woman is saying just because your not paid the law doesnt effect you? just because you dont have a “job” some one else can dictate what rights your supposed to agree with?

I’m sure SAHM know a lot more about things that affect their children then some suit does!!

moopfish 4 years ago

Being a stay at home mom is a job. It’s work. I understand that.
However, if all her kids are out of the house. Get a job.

Kate 4 years ago

Exactly! This debate needs to die and women need to support each other. I work and my sister stays home. We gain such support and validation from each other. Being a mom is hard. Period. And the more both of call each other, the more we realize that the grass is greener on the other side some of the time. And that’s okay. Our kids will all end up in therapy for something we did to them either way.

Kisha 4 years ago

A discourse tha simple pits women against each other is so common and disprespectful. I’m sure that the life experiences of Ann Romney do not match mine. I’d like to think that everyone could have a little empathy for the situation, circumstances, and life coices of others. I know this isn’t always the case, but One would hope. I don’t really care if Mrs. Romney bends her husband ear on economics or more ‘traditional womens issues”, actually I’d like to think that most couples discuss the big issues around the kitchen table, just like my husband and I do.

I fear however this and the public conversation in general May have been side tracked by if Ann Romney worked at home or not. Are we not all a little more conserned about what she thinks than the percentage I domestic slog she actually did or entrusted to servants.

I can’t say I care if she,”Never worked a day in her life.” I’m much more conserned about an anti-union economic policy or a repeal of the health care gains.

Erin@MommyontheSpot 4 years ago

Every mother needs something different to be a good mom and be there for her family. You are right; we should not be judging each other. We should be supporting each other.

But what drives me mad is all that cheap talk about how hard it is to be a SAHM. Yes, it is hard. But instead of this empty praise, why don’t we create a society that supports motherhood by having more than 6 weeks paid maternity leave or has more flexibility from where she can work. And why don’t mothers work together to support each other instead of tearing each other down.

*off my soap box*

    kay3 4 years ago

    I agree we should help each other and I try to help other moms when I can thats why I watch my niece for my sister so she doesnt have to pay a daycare and so she knows her daughter is safe because alot of the daycares around here aren’t very good. I truly belive that it takes a village to raise a child. and we are no longer a village now we seem to be a I know how to do it better society. We including myself at times dont want to listen to women who have been here done this. It took me many years to listen to my mothers advice dont sweat the small stuff and that I was going to make mistakes but as long as I loved my kids and tried my best my kids would be fine and its the truth my mom really did know what she was talking about, never thought I say that LOL. But I guess thats when we realize we have really grown up when our moms start making sense.

Jenn 4 years ago

I do completely disagree with what Rosen said regarding Mrs. Romney not getting to have an opinion. We all get to have opinions regardless of our work history. But I do think it’s just very hard for working moms to take in. Because yes, mothering 5 children is extremely hard work. No one can deny that. But mothering 5 children and working a full time job is MUCH harder. And unless you’ve done it, you will probably not understand just how hard. And those of us who do work outside the home…we do ALL of that stuff you listed above. We are teachers, janitors, cooks, therapists, chauffers, and whatever else is needed of us. AND we work 40 hours a week. So yes, she gets an opinion. I just don’t think it’s probably coming from a very realistic place as far as working moms are concerned.

    kay3 4 years ago

    Ive been both a working mom and a stay at home mom and both are just as hard just in different ways. Do you consider daycare workers or nannies as having a real job? Do you think there jobs aren’t stressfull? When I worked I missed my kids and I had to cram everything into the weekends. Now I spend my days chasing after 3 sons one of which is a year old and my 4 year old niece. I miss having friends to talk with about politics and world events now i spend my day talking about nick jr and dr suess. I understand that I am lucky to be able to have the choice to stay at home with them but please dont tell me its not as hard. When I decided to stay at home a few years ago my so called friends stopped calling and didnt have much to say when I called them except about how it must be nice to have so much free time now that I didn’t “work”. Its hard on all of us . Maybe if we helped each other instead of trying to out do each other it would be eaiser on all of us. I watch my niece so my sister doesnt have to pay for daycare and she gives me a break from the kids so I dont go crazy LOL Until we have walked a mile in someones shoes we shouldnt judge them.

      Jenn 4 years ago

      I dont think I was judging anyone. My first statement was that we all have a right to our own opinion. This has nothing to do with whether or not SAH moms work hard. Of cousre they do! I, too, have been both a SAH and a working mom. And for me and most moms I know, working outside of the home too is by far harder. You said it yourself, we try to “cram” it all in. I’m sorry that your friends didnt except your decision to stay at home. That’s horrible! And I never said or believe that SAH moms have tons of “free time.” That’s nuts. My point was that I didn’t feel like she was coming from a realistic place as far as working moms are concerned so I understand why people are upset with her statement. But working or not, we all get an opinion.

        kay3 4 years ago

        I agree that we all have the right to an opinion and if I came off a bit bitchy I didnt mean to. But I also know a lot of moms who have told me they would never want to give up thier jobs to stay at home and wipe buts and cook and clean and deal with thier kids 24/7 (thier words not mine). When we stay at home with our kids we feel and other women make us feel like were wasting our lives and when were working we feel and other women make us feel like were neglecting our kids , when infact were all doing whats best for our own families. But we all seem to have some kind of guilt. and while I have more time to do housework, school projects with the kids, cook dinner ect… I also have to clean that same house 10 times a day along with teaching my 4 year old niece and my 1 year old son and tutoring my 13 and 10 year old and my husband works 3rd shift so hes asleep all day and at work all night and when hes awake its baseball practice,doctors appointments,school confrences,ect.. mabye its where we live that also makes a difference. I live in a small town in the south no mommy and me classes, no yoga classes,no play groups,nothing to help me connect me with other SAHM except SM. So while it may be eaiser for some moms to stay at home than work its not allways the case. But I do love it no matter if it is hard and Im blessed to have the choice. And I wasnt saying you were judging people what I ment was our society judges women for our choices.

amber 4 years ago

What is interesting to me is all the assumptions about the Romneys just because they have money. Is it unbelievable that just because ONE has money ONE would hire help? Is it really that hard to believe that she raised her own kids? I have a very wealthy family friend. They had 10 kids. They didnt pay for their kids expenses beyond paying for their college degrees and once they were married they were on their own. Some of those kids have made millions themselves…largely off the hard work and smarts of their own and yes connections of their parents….but this family while not as weathly as the Romneys, never hired help to raise those kids, and they were all self sufficient. It galls me to think that most people think if you have money you are out of touch. That you must have all the help in the world etc. The people I know with money have more small business, put people to work, help the poor, involved in community, volunteer, sit on boards of charities, are MORE in touch than I could ever be as I work 9 hours a day and come home to my 3 children and work most of the night. My time to help the needy is slim, volunteer almost laughable…
I just dont get the big deal if a family that has money…GOOD for THEM!

    Bryce 4 years ago

    First, we know for a fact that Mitt had a “gardening service” to manage some of the upkeep. We know this because there was a mini scandal over their use of illegal immigrant labor. It was a stupid, pointless scandal that I don’t believe reflects poorly on Romney. But it doesn’t indicate that he was saving money by making the kids mow the lawn.

    Second, we know from his tax records that in 2010, Mitt Romney paid about $20,000 in wages for house help, divided over four women. Mind you, this is years after her kids had moved out, and it only covers the help they received from people directly in their employ. If the Romneys had hired a maid service, or a car service, or a gardening service, or a catering service, that wouldn’t show up on their tax returns, because the service would be the one withholding wages on behalf of the IRS.

    So we know that Ann Romney isn’t doing it entirely on her own. And as Mitt was basically unemployed in 2010, he should have been pitching in as well.

    Honestly, I’d rather talk about policy than Mitt and Ann Romney’s private life. But Ann pretty much declared Hilary Rosen’s barb to be an attack on all stay-at-home moms (and by extension, women’s rights to make choices about their own lives). Which brings up just how much she has in common with the millions of women she lined up between her and Ms. Rosen.

    It’s frustrating to argue with someone who simply assumes without evidence that the wealthy are entitled to their wealth, that they worked hard for it, that wealth automatically implies virtue, and that their having hundreds of millions in resources doesn’t deprive anyone else in any way.

    None of these ideas are valid. Surveys show that the wealthy actually give a smaller percentage of their income to charity than people lower down the socioeconomic ladder, and that more of that charity goes to things that disproportionately benefit the wealthy (the fine arts, for example). Other surveys show that people in positions of power exhibit sociopathic and vengeful behavior far more often than the population at large. Lastly, countries where there is a large gap between the richest and poorest citizens suffer from all manner of social ills (high crime, high teen pregnancy, high drug use, low educational achievement, obesity, etc.) that countries with lower measures of inequality do not.

    This country needs to stop worshiping the wealthy.

      Caroline 4 years ago

      Wealth is a mindset and poverty is a mindset. People just don’t become wealthy over night, unless you are a mega jackpot winner. You don’t worship the wealthy, you help people to aspire to become wealthy. I will rather be wealthy than poor. Don’t keep me poor to rule over me. So stock the war on the wealthy, instead of encouraging people that you can aspire to become wealthy, not materialistic. There are many frustrated millionaires and many happy people who do not have money. But you can have both if you work on your mindset.
      A lesson on poverty taken from “The Laws of Recognition”
      “Millions of problems exist on the earth. Solving those problems provides income, favor and the flow of financial provision for the billions living on the earth. Thousands remain impoverished because they have not recognized the problem closest to them that needs to be solved. Millions will never receive promotion because they ignore the problem closest to them. Poverty stinks. Rather than accuse the wealthy, and remain poor, I would rather learn how to solve a problem where I will be rewarded financially.

Bryce 4 years ago

“Something tells me that with that many sons, Mrs. Romney worked her ass off. She was a janitor.”

Or she hired one.

“She was a nurse.”

Or she hired one.

“She was a therapist, clown, baker and a chauffeur.”

When your husband has a net worth of $250M, you can hire those too.

“The list could go on all day.”

It’s amazing the variety of goods and services you can buy with insane amounts of money.

“I’m sure she wiped more butts at home than she would ever have had to kiss in the workplace. I also suspect that she has at least once in her life had to cut gum out of her own hair or fish a toy out of a dirty toilet.”

Perhaps she did. But she had the option to pay someone to do any portion of the “mommy job” that she found distasteful. Now, I don’t know for certain that she had any household staff (aside from the gardening crew that got Mitt into some trouble for hiring illegal immigrants). But I do know that, with the kind of money available to her, she had options for avoiding unpleasant tasks that 99% of mothers can’t imagine having. Even if she did it all herself (which I find rather unlikely), just knowing that you can hit the eject button at any time is a huge stress reliever.

“And, she did it for free. Because it was all part of the job.”

A job for which she was extremely well compensated. To the tune of $125M.

It is ridiculous for you or anyone to paint Hilary Rosen’s words as an attack on all stay-at-home moms. It’s a small part of a much broader attack on the qualifications of the woman whom Mitt Romney cites as his primary “women’s issues” adviser.

America’s women don’t need bromides about how being a mom is “the toughest job there is.” They need health care for their families. They need equal pay for equal work. They need access to affordable day care. They need higher wages, so that they can better support their families, and have the option to let one parent stay home. They need paid maternity leave. They need more money going into public education. They need access to contraception so that they can better plan their lives.

And those women are more likely to see every one of those things from an Obama administration than a Romney administration.

Twinisms 4 years ago

Brilliant. As always:)

Mercy 4 years ago

Very good. Fighting over who has it harder, or who works and who “doesn’t” will divide us. All mothers work whether they have a job outside the home or not.

Alyssa 4 years ago

Amen Jill. Great post.

Lindsay 4 years ago

Applaud* couldn’t have said it better! 😉 Thank you!

Jenn 4 years ago


Jen 4 years ago

This comment today really ticked me off. I guess I’m just sensitive to it. I don’t have children but chose to not follow a defined career path to support my husband in his. We moved a lot. I ended up taking care of the home front, dogs, horses, etc and moving whenever we needed to. This is about passing judgement on other women’s choices. To work full-time, part-time, raise children, it doesn’t matter. I don’t think Hilary Rosen did the democrats any favors today.

Kirsten 4 years ago


Kim 4 years ago

Well said! Goosebumps!

Cassie 4 years ago

Parenting is personal, which means that we need to leave our opinions to ourselves and let others do what is best for them. I have lost friendships because of this exact issue. If you tell someone that they are doing something wrong, with something as personal and emotional as parenting, you are bond to piss someone off. Just keep your comments to yourself, or better yet, try to put yourself in their shoes. You just might learn something!

amaliem 4 years ago

thank you and amen! you put into words what I’ve been thinking this whole morning.

Beth Simionescu 4 years ago

Well — I have three boys. I cried when I found out my third was going to be a boy. I woke up the morning after the “finding out” ultrasound praying that learning I was going to be mom to a third “healthy boy!” had all been a nightmare…It wasn’t. So let me just say hats off to Ms Romney and her 5 boys. I told my husband I had to get an IUD because if I “accidentally” got pregnant and it was another boy, I would probably have to be put away for a period of time….I can’t imagine the 5TH! ultrasound. With no hopes of barbies. ever. And the amount of work it takes to stay home with them is just astonishing.

Ms Rosen didn’t mean to say “never worked a day in her life”. This was an atrocious choice of words, obviously. But she really meant things like “never had to figure out how to get to work on time when the daycare doesn’t open until 6 am but she needs to be on the bus at 545am” She meant that when Republican Plans, like the Ryan Plan that Ms Romney’s husband endorses, cut government funding for daycare, food and healthcare and tell those same women to “suck it up and pull themselves up by their bootstraps because we as a society are sick of ‘freeloaders'”, people like Ms Romney aren’t affected. She meant that Ms Romney has never faced the problem of who will take care of her young children while she works for food. She meant Ms Romney “has never had to make a choice between nutritional food and medicine because the cost of healthcare is so obscene”. Ms Romney has always had food, healthcare, heat, shoes and babysitters. Other women should have that same help and similar resources for raising their children whether or not their husbands are rich or not. And THAT is something that should bond rather than divide us :0)
PS — while I do disagree on this point with Scary Mommy — Scary Mommy is my FAVORITE!!! Love love love your blog and want to get your book soon… are the best!

Lorraine Devon Wilke 4 years ago

While I agree with you about mothering – its value, demands, and never-ending involvement – one has to look at the bigger picture of what was being said if we’re going to honestly debate the political implications of this overblown and manipulated melee.

Mr. Romney abdicated to his wife as his spokesperson on women and the economy – like Dad passing the phone to Mom – and Hilary Rosen made her various remarks in relation to that ill-advised abdication. Anyone who reads or knows about Ms. Rosen knows that she, too, is a working mother and she’s made more than clear that she was NOT denigrating the role of motherhood, she was stating her opinion that Ann Romney, by virtue of having raised children in the protective security of wealth and privilege, was not really in a position to speak for MOST women out there struggling with what it is the 99% struggle with. And I agree.

The issue wasn’t whether or not mothering is bona fide work (which it surely is), the issue was whether or not Mrs. Romney’s very exclusive lifestyle gives her the kind of perspective one needs to speak for “women and the economy” for a Presidential candidate attempting to appeal to a wide spectrum of women. Now, Mrs. Romney seems like a very lovely woman and if I want to hear perspective on what it’s like to raise 5 boys in a Mormon home with a politician husband/father, certain health challenges (as Mrs. Romney has had), and the benefit of tremendous wealth, she’d be the go-to gal.

But if I want perspective on the struggles of most women – working Moms, single Moms, gay Moms, divorced Moms, etc. – to keep food on the table and the mortgage or rent paid, the medical and insurance bills under control, and the kids in warm clothes, all while wrangling a job at minimum wage or certainly less than a man doing the same job, while trying to get the healthcare needed to prevent unwanted pregnancies (or care for a pregnancy chosen or unable to prevent), and so on and so on…Mrs. Romney would have very little insight into THAT side of being a working mother. And that, I believe, was Ms. Rosen’s point. And most intelligent women out here NOT bowing down to a political party know that.

I agree we women should bond rather than divide, but let’s be sure we do that without demonizing one of us unnecessarily and buying into manipulated words to suit a political party’s purpose. That, I believe, is all that this brouhaha is about.

    Beth Simionescu 4 years ago

    well put!! I think we were writing these at the same time. Had I read yours, I wouldn’t have had to write mine, hahaha.

      Pauline Gaines 4 years ago

      Couldn’t agree with both of you more.

Sweety Darlin 4 years ago

You know this morning when I heard this preposterous comment I started laughing so hard that I woke my family. I was a stay-at-home mom and I now work outside the home. I had a VERY KEEN GRASP of what the economics of things are in both positions, and to be honest probably more when I was at home. I had to pay the bills and balance the budget, and do everything else that had to be done so that he could work his 60 hour weeks. I know more about economics than politicians and I would put dollars on a table that so does Ann Romney!

I have a serious problem with the way women don’t support one another. Last time I checked we have enough things going against us the last thing we need is to start after each other at the same time!


As for Hillary.. SHAME ON YOU!

Natalie 4 years ago

Beautifully stated :)

Christy 4 years ago

This is fantastic. What a wonderful example of someone comfortable in her own skin. Well done!

Carla 4 years ago

I agree with you that motherhood is the hardest job. It is the toughest job I’ve ever had. But I disagree that it is a career “decision” that women can make. For many of us there was never a choice. I had to return to a paid job because we needed the income. It wasn’t a question of choosing a “less expensive lifestyle” I either worked or we didn’t have enough money for rent, food and diapers. Granted, I love what I do, and I might have chosen to go back to my paid job regardless. But it was never a personal decision I could make. We’re a solid middle class family. It’s much worse for low income families or single moms. Many have to go back to sucky jobs. They do not have the luxury of choice.

    Caroline 4 years ago

    Carla I hate to say this again. But I believe you do have a choice. If you come from the point that you don’t have a choice, you will remain stock in a job you don’t like. You can make a change, just by spending an hour a day to learn how to do something new that can replace your job. Some new skills. I learn how to trade forex from youtube for free. Bought one trading book from amazon. That was it. Made up my mind to learn until I got it right and now I trade from home while my kids are in school. When they come home, I have enough time to care for them. So you do have a choice.

kay3 4 years ago

Amen!!!! first of all what she said offended me. Just because a woman chose to stay at home with her kids doesnt mean that she doesnt know anything about bussiness or the economy. I think being a mom either stay at home or working qualify you to be an expert on about anything. She raised 5 boys !!!!!! 5!!!!! for example having to break up fights with all of those kids and teach them to find a way to get along that could help with conflict resolution in a workplace. cooking, cleaning, for 7 people yea can we say time management. and we all worry about are childrens future. Just because Ive never been a writer doesnt mean that I dont know what a good book is. We all work hard and should respect each other and help each other out.

    Bryce 4 years ago

    You really think that Ann Romney cooked and cleaned for seven people? If your husband was bringing in millions of dollars every year, would you? Or would you hire a household staff to do it all for you?

    I suspect Ann Romney is a fine human being. But Hilary Rosen is right: Mitt Romney has no business using Ann as his primary source of information on women’s issues. She has lived a life of privilege, where she never had to worry about how to obtain health care services, never worked for a sexist boss, never had to make a tough choice between food and gas, the electric bill or the mortgage, car repairs or plumbing. She’s never found herself floundering financially because her husband walked out on her, or because she couldn’t take the abuse of an alcoholic husband. She’s never been fired from a crappy job waiting tables because she had trouble arranging transportation or day care. She’s never had to quit college because she couldn’t afford tuition.

    Hilary Rosen’s word choice was unfortunate, perhaps even disastrous. But her point was spot-on: Mitt has designated this pampered, privileged woman as his go-to source for information on the struggles of women. That’s ridiculous.

      kay3 4 years ago

      First of all my husband and I are wealthy and guess what its not evan from our own work, we inherited a large sum of money and property when his grandfather died, and my husband makes good money at his job so yes I could hire a nanny and a maid if I wanted to. And if I did it wouldnt make me any less of a mother.You seem to have so much anger against wealthy people in fact you sound jealous and snotty. I may not agree with her husbands views but I respect EVERY mother. But for a min. lets use your logic how can any white person advise a president about black issues,since they have never been black. How can a christan or jew advise the president about muslim issues,they have never been a muslim. And how can a man be an obstetrician because he will never truly know what its like to be pregnant. Not only that most of our politicians have never had to struggle either but we still vote for them. Maybe if we all stop trying to divide ourselves and work together we can bring this country back to where it should be.

        Bryce 4 years ago

        I never said that it was entirely impossible for someone to understand something without experiencing it firsthand. But if a white president ever stood up and pointed to another white person as his source for information on “black issues,” then that person had better have unimpeachable credentials on those issues.

        But there is nothing in Ann Romney’s history or life story that makes me think that she truly understands what life is like for a middle-class stay-at-home mom, much less for a single working mom. Mitt, the man she is doing such a great job advising, decided that single mothers with young children who were receiving government aid needed to find real jobs so that they could “know the dignity of work.”

        So you see the double standard. His own lovely wife? A great mother who worked hard to raise her kids, regardless of how much help she may have had around the house. Some poor, knocked up hussy on the welfare rolls? Get the woman out of the house and the child into a day care center. We don’t want her weak moral character infecting that kid.

        “You seem to have so much anger against wealthy people in fact you sound jealous and snotty.”

        If it sounds that way, it’s only because I truly believe that large inequalities of wealth are disastrous to society. On average, societies where the very wealthiest members aren’t too much better off than the very poorest, we see huge drops in violent crime, teen pregnancy, drug use, and obesity, and huge gains in educational achievement. Interestingly, countries with low inequality also give a larger fraction of their GNP away in the form of humanitarian aid. There is a book called “The Spirit Level” that goes into detail.

        “I may not agree with her husbands views but I respect EVERY mother.”

        I find that statement strange, and unlikely to be true. I don’t respect every mother. Some are simply awful people whose children need to be taken away. Others are incompetent, but might be able to avoid doing damage to their kids if they had access to social services like psychological counseling, mentoring, etc.

        By and large, I think most mothers are doing the best they know how with the resources available to them (physical, emotional, financial, intellectual), and that is admirable. The work of raising children into happy and capable adults is vital and difficult. So I fully respect Ann Romney’s work as a mother, and if she threw money at the task to make some of the most distasteful parts of the task go away, I’m not judging.

        Right up to the moment where she turns around and says, my role as wife and mother makes me an expert and competent advisor on women’s issues, and if you criticize me, you’re criticizing all of Mommydom. I’ll say it again: Ann Romney knows some of the difficulties of motherhood, but she is utterly blind to others. There are some issues she has firsthand experience with, and others where she is no better qualified than I am.

Bobbi Sheahan 4 years ago

Thanks for saying this.
I’m embarrassed for the person who made that statement.

tracy@sellabitmum 4 years ago

Brava my friend. YOU rock. xoxo (also I need a raise..oh wait..)

Jenny 4 years ago

Very good post. Raising children is no small task, and the least we as mothers can do for one another is hold back our judgements.

Lauren 4 years ago

I’m sorry, but what does what his wife have to do with anything anyway? Of course she will counsel her husband on what course she thinks is best if asked…that’s what wives do, all of us, whether we know what the hell we’re really talking about or not. We give it our best thoughtful answer, try to help, and keep moving. What woman who ever was or ever will be first lady (including my hero – Hillary) will know how to best resolve EVERY political decision her husband will face as president??? The real question is: how do we begin to have real discussions about the merits of each candidate without all this innane bullshit?

Melissa 4 years ago

I completely disagree that the fact that Mrs. Romney chose to stay home to raise her kids immediately means that she is in a class above the “average” woman. I know a lot of women, friends and family alike, that have chosen to stay home and raise their kids, and they are FAR from privileged or rich, myself included. After my maternity leave was up my husband and I made the decision that I would stay home with my daughter, and believe me we have sacrificed a lot, and lived meagerly on 1 income. We have chosen family over money, and I absolutely believe that more women could stay home with their kids if they really budgeted and tightened their belts. I absolutely believe that most people can’t imagine living a “less expensive lifestyle”, and so they don’t even try. The Romney’s clearly are rich now, but did they start off that way back then when she first made that decision? I don’t think so.

Also, I resent the implication that because she hasn’t had a job that gives her a paycheck, she can’t possibly know what women want or need economically, or what is good for the American family. If she sat behind a desk for the past 25 years working 9-5 I’m sure she’d be a friggin expert, rather than what she in now – a dynamic mother of 5 successful children, and wife of a man who is a genius when it comes to business. Give me a break.

    Jenny 4 years ago

    Amen! An intelligent, thoughtful response.

    Cheryl 4 years ago


    Ali 4 years ago

    you wrote:
    “We have chosen family over money, and I absolutely believe that more women could stay home with their kids if they really budgeted and tightened their belts. I absolutely believe that most people can’t imagine living a “less expensive lifestyle”, and so they don’t even try.”
    Wow – so you’re saying that women who work outside the home just didn’t *try* hard enough or make enough sacrifices? Telling me by working I’m chosing money over my family? Really?? This type of comment is exactly what causes this unnecessary divide between moms. Not only are you accusing moms who work outside the home of not trying hard enough, you’re implying that the *better* thing and only acceptable thing is TO stay home. Maybe I work outside the home because I need to so that we have health insurance or enough to eat, maybe it’s because I want to.
    Please remember that not everybody has the choice or desire to stay home. Be respectful and understanding of everyone’s choices. I wish for the day when men have to deal with these conversations….

    Bryce 4 years ago

    “I know a lot of women, friends and family alike, that have chosen to stay home and raise their kids, and they are FAR from privileged or rich, myself included.”

    I applaud your decision to live within your means, and to spend time on your family rather than pursue greater material wealth. But you’re claiming that very few if any women actually need to work (they could just choose a “less expensive lifestyle”). And that’s downright insulting to working women everywhere.

    It ignores the existence of single mothers. It ignores the existence of women whose husbands can’t or won’t work. It ignores the existence of women whose husbands can’t make enough to support even a meager lifestyle. It ignores the existence of women whose husbands’ jobs don’t provide health insurance. It ignores the existence of women whose mortgages are high simply because they put a priority on getting their kids into “a good school.” It ignores the existence of women who don’t find the job of “being mom” as fulfilling as you do.

    And while you may not feel rich or privileged, the fact that you don’t feel any pressure to get a job puts you several rungs up the privilege ladder from millions of women who literally have no choice but to work. If even your viewpoint is so narrow and blinkered, imagine what it must be like for a woman like Ann Romney, who has always been able to buy anything she deemed necessary for her family?

    You wrote: “The Romney’s clearly are rich now, but did they start off that way back then when she first made that decision? I don’t think so.”

    Actually, he was. Mitt Romney’s father was very wealthy. When Mitt and Ann were newlyweds in college, they described themselves as “struggling to make ends meet.” So what did they do? Did one drop out and get a job to support the other’s academic career? No. They decided to sell some of the stock Mitt had gotten from his family in order to buy a house, as it was cheaper than paying rent.

    That was a wise financial decision, I’m sure. But it’s not a choice that most young college couples have.


    Read it. As a “struggling” college student, he had a net worth of nearly $400K (today’s dollars). I’ll admit, I admire their ability to live cheaply when they had the option not to. I live cheaply too (my living expenses last year were less than half my pretty meager income), but I’m under no illusions that I’m anything but privileged, or that I have special insight into the struggles of people who live cheaply because they have no choice.

Sue 4 years ago

I stay at home and save my family hundreds of dollars by not utilizing daycare. I am able to really “shop around for deals”, I am able to plan weekend events that are nearly free, and family filled. I take MY job seriously. I take pride and joy in my work, even if its just that I managed to do almost ALL the laundry and the house stopped smelling like boy a/o dog for the day. I also have a part time job that provides me a lil’ extra cash. As both a sahm and a worker bee I know that these are things that make our family run, so as cfo, ceo and speaker of this house, I continue to do more than bring home the bacon. And no one is going to make me feel inferior without my consent – Thank you Eleanor Roosevelt.

Melissa 4 years ago

First I don’t think the intention was to wage SAHM v working moms but unfortunately her pitiful choice of words could take it in that direction. Even from a rich family I am certain she had a whole separate set of challenges being raised in a wealthy family.

…But since we get off the topic and are now discussing SAHM v working mom’s I want to say I have a whole new perspective on this topic. I am not a mom that worked and then chose to stay at home when my children were born rather I worked full time up until my second son turned 8 weeks…then I moved for my husbands work and now stay at home. I work just 10 hrs a week and have a nanny during those hours otherwise it is all mommy time. I can say without a doubt that I was LESS stressed when I worked full time and then came home to do the mommy thing in the evenings and on weekends. There are perks to being the SAHM like spreading your house duties over a week instead of cramming them I into Saturday but I can now say going to the office while someone I trust cares for my child 8 hours a day certainly made my life simpler. I scheduled dentist & doctor appts during my work hours and would take off and do that all in my child’s regular day of daycare…now I don’t get much time to myself which includes toting my kids to my dental appts etc. as a SAHM I am working nonstop as a full time working mom I had. Deals and adult conversation. Both are hard tasks and hats off to any mommy trying to do it all. I just want all mommies to realize we all have challenges and mom’s work very hard!

Shirley@motivatedmommyoftwo 4 years ago

I do not take anything away from Mrs Romney because she choose to be a stay at home mom with her kids. If I had the means I would love to be a stay at home mom as well. But as a working woman it is really hard for me to believe that someone who came from a wealthy family and married into a wealthy marriage,really know anything about moms who struggle financially. I mean if she wants to advice her husband on woman go ahead but about the economy hmmm?? maybe stay away from that.

–g 4 years ago

Since her oldest son was born in 1970, then the 2nd in 1971, while they were both undergrads, living in a $75 a month apartment, I doubt they had a nanny then. She finished up her degree with 2 kids, a husband in law school, AND pregnant with their 3rd son. To be judgmental without at least looking into the truth is just wrong. She may actually know something about what we go through and you sound snitty and judgmental saying ‘she just had nannies.’ Having been a nanny, I know the mom still does a lot.

    Jenny 4 years ago

    Thank you! :) People really should get their facts straight before making assumptions and sounding so hateful and jealous.

    Heather B 4 years ago

    yup. And even if she did have nannies for, maybe the last couple of kids, it’s not like each of those boys is ten to fifteen years apart. So her second career is political spouse (which is a career in and of itself.), most women these days don’t raise one child without a nanny if they can possibly have one, even if they call the nanny “gramma” or “your sitter is coming today,” instead of “nanny.” I think it’s just crucial to stop defining what it means to work, paid or unpaid, or to mother/nurture, in the home, adoptive, foster,working three jobs, or otherwise. That’s why this sudden firestorm.

    Nicole 4 years ago

    Just for the record, they did not live in a $75 a month apartment. His father was the CEO of American Motors and they went to a private high school. I can pretty much guarantee that they did not live a shabby life while attending their college and postgraduate schools…

      –g 4 years ago

      @Nicole–how do you know they didn’t live in a $75 a month apartment? Were you there? Have you seen their budget from 1970? I didn’t just make it up–it’s on their bios in Wikipedia. I would guess that would count for something other than you just assuming that they didn’t. Some parents don’t pay for everything once their kids get married. Some parents cut their kids off when they get 18 (even if they aren’t married). Some people won’t take their parent’s money and want to make it on their own. Quit with the assumptions!

      Bryce 4 years ago

      Actually, they did live fairly “shabbily” during their college days at BYU, at least by their own report. But that’s not to say that they struggled in any meaningful sense of the word.


      I was born and raised Mormon, and living cheap is kind of part of that culture (one that stayed with me to this day, long after most of my other Mormonesque qualities fell by the wayside). I find it fairly admirable. But it’s one thing to try hard not to dip into money you have, and it’s quite another to not have the money when rent is due. Mitt and Ann have never experienced that side of life.

      Caroline 4 years ago

      Nicole it does not matter. They made a choice and so can you.

        Nicole 4 years ago

        Caroline, she made a choice to cash in her husband stocks and live on a mere 60k while he finished up school. I have no problem with her being a SAHM, I have a problem with her comparing herself to the average American mom. She is not an average mom, she is wealthy and privileged, meaning she is out of touch with my normal life. Please don’t let her speak about choices when clearly she had many more options than what is available to most.

Shelli 4 years ago

Jill, as usual, you nailed it!

Heather 4 years ago

Well said! That’s just the sentiment I tried to tweet earlier, but you said it way more eloquently.

Jennifer Rustgi 4 years ago

“What I do know is that pitting stay-at-home-mothers against working moms gains us nothing. So here’s an idea: let’s support one another’s decisions. ”

Well said!

Michele 4 years ago

This debate isn’t about working moms vs. stay at home moms….we all know that would be comparing apples to oranges!! Ann Romney is technically neither, since she worked neither inside nor outside the home…unless hiring nannies and housekeepers counts as work. She lives far beyond the means of most people, and even those of us fortunate enough to sacrifice some luxuries to be home with our kids aren’t in her league….how can she be compare with a mom who has no choice but to get her ass out and work for a living? She is NOT the mom to use as a role model for most of us.

    Pauline Gaines 4 years ago

    I agree. I think the conversation is about privilege, not the virtues of working or SAHMs. I went from being a wealthy, privileged, married mother of two to a scrambling-to-make-ends-meet divorced working mother of two and the two worlds are in no way comparable. There were so many difficult things I didn’t experience when I had the privileges I had when I was married to a rich person. There were things I just got used to, things money shields you from. It is hard for me to believe that Mrs. Romney isn’t shielded from ordinary women’s stresses as well. Of course, mothers should not be judged on their choice to either work or stay home, but the point is, so many women really don’t have a choice. And that, I think, is what Hilary Rosen was addressing.

      Caroline 4 years ago

      I don’t buy it. How can you say many women don’t have a choice. Yes you do have a choice and don’t let anyone tell that. You do have a choice. I made a choice to learn something that will enable me stay home and take care of my kids without working out of the house. I spend hours learning from free videos on youtube. I give you an example. Go to google and type in “how to”. You will see so many things that people are looking for. If you find anything you are good at that people are looking for, then go ahead a do a little bit of research and start a blog, make a video and give a solution to that problem. Before you know it, people will pay you for your valuable solutions. You may not be where you want to be now, but if you decide to make a change and invest sometime learning something new you could change your financial situation. You can do it as a mother, as a woman. Know this. You have a choice.

J 4 years ago

I concur. It really pisses me off that women are constantly being pitted against each other when it comes to motherhood. It is hard nor matter the circumstances.

Mommy123 4 years ago

Nice points, but Moms who work are all those things (janitor, nurse, et al), but we have full time jobs with bosses, co-workers, commutes and responsibilities to contend with – THEN get to come home and do everything SAHMs have had all day to do. Just saying.

    Joanna 4 years ago

    I am also a FT work outside the home mom, but I don’t necessarily agree with you. Yes, I still have to wipe butts, wake up at ungodly hours 7 days a week, get up for ever nightmare or drink of water, read stories, do bath, make dinner, pack lunch, and go grocery shopping. BUT…. with two FT working parents, my husband contributes 50%. I think when one parent stays home, the parent who works does a lot less around the house because they feel entitled to the down time. Also, I am not wiping the butt while I am at work. So, I am not sure that I do twice as much work the way you are describing.

    Still, I feel what you are saying. The time our kids are at daycare/with nanny/whatever, is not restful time for us. And the time the quittin’ bell rings – well that’s not the end of our day.

      Kim 4 years ago

      Thank you Joanna! I am a SAHM and I do everything around the house and I am alone with my 3 yr old son Monday-Saturday. I sometimes feel like crying when he wakes up from his nap because I do not know how I am going to entertain him and take care of the household chores for the rest of the day. Not to mention how degrading it can be to ask for an allowance after having a well paid job. I have a friend who works full time and I admire her for being able to do that and fell like an a$$ complaining to her about being tired. So long story short we really need to respect each other. We are all in this together trying to do our best and survive it. Thank you again for your respect and praise of both sides :-)

Julie @DutchBeingMe 4 years ago

As someone who is not a mother, but raised by someone who chose to both stay at home with us *and* (later) go back to work – I completely respect mothers who make these decisions. There are so many different reasons why women choose what kind of work they are doing (whether in their control or not) and whether it is at home or out of the home.

I could not agree with you more – women need to stop criticizing each other on all of these things and start supporting each other in whatever decisions we make.

Can I say it again? Scary Mommy for President! :)

Eve 4 years ago

YES YES YES! I work full-time outside of the home AND I work full-time at home as a mom caring for a crazy two-year-old boy who likes to take off his diaper and smear poop on my hardwood floors. I love both jobs, but seriously, the mom gig is WAY harder than my day job. Plus, we never get time off, despite needing it almost as much as oxygen. Maybe more so.

Cheryl 4 years ago

Here’s to bonding over explosive diarrhea! Oh, and AMEN sister! You just said what I’ve been thinking. Why are moms still doing this crap to other moms? We have enough crap to deal with at home w/ our kids (and their fathers), not to mention the rest of the world. Know what I’m sayin’? Sheesh!

Elizabeth Flora Ross 4 years ago

Amen! Then again, you are preaching to the choir with me. Also? You sound like a member of The Mom Pledge Community. 😉

The last two lines are awesome!

bunny 4 years ago

Um… as a multi-millionaire, it’s kinda doubtful that Mrs. Romney raised her kids without the help of nannies. While I agree with the rest of your message, comparing her experience to that of your average mom isn’t quite accurate. (And yeah, many average moms have to hire childcare instead – but they have to worry about how to pay for it. Mrs. Romney? Not so much.)

    Gina 4 years ago


    shorby 4 years ago

    no nannies. i know it’s inconceivable to some that there are women who do their own mothering and cooking and cleaning and so forth when they can afford not to…but there are. and the romneys are among them. she raised those kids, not a nannie.

      bunny 4 years ago

      1) Source?
      2) Okay, so did she also do all of the housecleaning, the washing of clothing, the preparing of meals? Doubt it.

kj 4 years ago

Sing it, sista! :)

imperfectmomma 4 years ago

Yes! Who cares if one person gets dressed and talks to other adults daily about something other than a poop schedule?! Why can’t we all just get along?

Evin Cooper 4 years ago

I don’t know that Hilary Rosen was saying anything about SAHMs vs. working moms… I havent’ read her response to the furor yet but what I took from it is more “What does a rich man’s daughter who became a rich man’s wife know about any struggling woman’s day-to-day circumstances” – It’s like asking Paris Hilton what it’s like to pinch pennies. I could be reading too much into it, of course. Most SAHMs had jobs before they became moms though, so the “never worked a day in her life” comment sounds more like reference to her lifetime of 1%-ness than her SAHM status.

    Shirley@motivatedmommyoftwo 4 years ago

    “What does a rich man’s daughter who became a rich man’s wife know about any struggling woman’s day-to-day circumstances” –
    I really like what you said here, I have to agree that this is the same way I took the comment. I do not think it was about putting stay at home moms down or saying that those of us who work are better moms.

      Pauline Gaines 4 years ago


        Heather B 4 years ago

        But, if Ms Rosen had meant that, perhaps she would have, I dunno, said “That’s not what I meant, here’s what I meant instead,” instead of digging in and vehemently attacking over and over again….

          Tanya 4 years ago

          I watched part her interview on CNN and that’s exactly how she explained it. I took her comment to mean, “what does someone who doesn’t have to depend on child care know about the struggles of paying for child care.” I don’t see anything wrong with that statement. I would never assume I understood the trials of a mom who say had children with special needs because I don’t. And therefore I wouldn’t be giving my opinion on whether or not their funding should be cut.

          Jill 4 years ago

          The full context of Hillary’s comments were as follows and although the one sentence is horrible when taken OUT OF CONTEXT, when put into context it makes perfect sense.

          “What you have is Mitt Romney running around the country, saying, ‘Well, you know, my wife [Ann Romney] tells me that what women really care about are economic issues, and when I listen to my wife, that’s what I’m hearing.’ Guess what? His wife has actually never worked a day in her life,” Rosen said.

          She’s never really dealt with the kinds of economic issues that a majority of the women in this country are facing, in terms of how do we feed our kids, how do we send them to school, and why do we worry about their future.” Rosen continued.”

          Kelly Cloak 4 years ago

          Ann Romney is a cancer survivor, lives with MS and has raised 5 boys. Perhaps her immediate needs worries were not the same as someone living paycheck to paycheck, but to say that Ann Romney never had to worry about how to feed her kids, how to get them to school, or what their future holds, shows a mindboggling lack of empathy at least. Rosen’s comments were inflammatory, intentionally so, and the firestorm that has followed was foreseeably. The apology seems to say, oh, it’s because she’s rich, not a stay at home mom. Somehow, I’m just as insulted. Money is not an inherent evil. The abiding and accepted strawman set up by the Occupy movement and embraced by the left seems to say that it is, and that is as dangerous a stereotype as hoodies are evil. As moms, we all need to support each other, hold each other up, build a better world. This cannot happen when those in a position to control the dialogue continue to tear us apart and divide us for profit.

          Pauline Gaines 4 years ago

          This is about choice. Period. I have not heard Hilary Rosen, or anyone else, attack Ann Romney for being a SAHM or be blase about the fact that she deals gracefully with a chronic illness. What Rosen was rightly shining a light on, as many commmenters on this thread have pointed out, is that Romney has so many more choices that other women — just as deserving as Ann Romney — don’t have. THAT is what needs to change in this country.

          Kelly Cloak 4 years ago

          Pauline, I have heard that so many times. My experience tells me, however, that the only choices celebrated are the choices on the left’s agenda. All others will be margainalized and publically mocked. Rosen’s comments on their face mocked a husband seeking the advice of his wife by tearing down his wife and denegrading her choices. If that is modern feminism, or modern liberalism, count me out.

          Pauline Gaines 4 years ago

          It’s unfortunate that there is such a divide in this country, or even in this comment thread. No one should feel that they are marginalized or diminished because of their values. You feel that your choices, and those — I am presuming from what you have written — are mocked by liberals in this country. Progressives — of which I am one — feel that their reality is completely overlooked by the right and by corporate America. I still don’t think that modern feminism, as you referred to it, demeans women who are in the position to stay at home with their kids. Feminism is all about expanding the choices of women and women have choices in this day and age largely because of the work of feminists…but that’s a subject for a different blog post.

      Caroline 4 years ago

      Not true. Your struggles may be financial. Have you been through breast cancer? Have you struggle with ms? Please tell me. You know what the fact that you have not struggle with these stuff does not mean that you cannot learn the struggles that this people go through. Have we become a nation that vilified the wealthy just because they are wealthy? It may be a popular fight politically, but don’t you see what the politicians are doing to this nation? Cuba, Venezuela, formal USSR tried this by distributing wealth to everyone equally. Well we all know how the results turn out. USSR is still growing strong financially. Cuba and Venezuela and booming economically. Step back and think. No one will go through the same struggles are you.

Jennifer 4 years ago

I feel like Rosen’s words were taken in a way that she did not intend. Granted, she did not do a very good job communicating her intention either. I don’t think she meant to pit working mothers against stay at home mothers. I think her point was that Ann Romney can not understand what is like for women that do not have her means, which is 100% true. She can’t.

There will not be a “mommy war” if we stand strong and continue to turn the conversation back to the real issues and away from this created one.

    shortii311 4 years ago

    I disagree. Maybe they have the means NOW, but I’m sure as in any household with children, especially with 5 kids at home, they didn’t start out this way. They worked their way UP from where they STARTED to earn the means they now. Let’s not forget that important part.

      Jennifer 4 years ago

      It is my understanding that Romney has affluent parents. I bet his mother never had to stretch a pot of pinto beans to make sure her kids had enough to eat.

      DW 4 years ago

      I disagree with the disagreement. They have had means for a long, long time. I doubt Ann Romney scrubs her own toilets and washes her own floors or had to worry about rent or food. It doesn’t negate that loving five children and being active with them isn’t work – it is. But Ann Romney likely does not understand the struggles that a typical working mom knows.

        Caroline 4 years ago

        Do you mean to say that because Bill Gate has money, Bill Gate does not understand what people in Africa living with aids are going through? He sure does know that is why he is helping. All these celebrities promoting support for Southern sudan have a lot of money, but does that negate the fact that they don’t understand what these people in south Sudan are going through, hell no. The fact that someone has money does not automatically remove them from what others are going through.So this petty party of Ann Romney does not understand because Romney had affluent parents does not add up. How many kids grew up in well to do home and turn out really bad?

    Pauline Gaines 4 years ago

    I felt 100% the same way — that Rosen was referring to the fact that Ann Romney has had a choice not to work that many of us don’t have. I also find the Romneys to come across as very out-of-touch with the issues most Americans face, something that their money has shield them from.

      Caroline 4 years ago

      The fact that someone has money or is wealthy does not mean they don’t understand what others are going through. The fact that someone is not wealthy or does not have money does not make them expert either in economic issues for women. This is political mis-calculation. The mindset that the rich don’t get it is a terrible mindset to have. They do get it. Most of the time they help much more than the poor will ever be able to do. When was the last time a poor person gave you a job? I desire in my heart to become a job creator. So as a stay home mom, I spend hours learning how to trade from videos on youtube. And now I trade fulltime from home while taking care of my 4 kids. So tomorrow if someone make a statement like this about me, what do you think I should say to them? Ann Romney is right. She made a choice,we need to respect that, money or no money. I am not wealthy yet, but I will get there.

        Pauline Gaines 4 years ago

        I’m really not sure what you mean by “when was the last time a poor person gave you a job?”

        Some rich, like Eleanor Roosevelt and the Kennedys get it (what it’s like for poor people), and work tirelessly to level the playing field. Some rich don’t get it and work to keep power in the hands of a few. I have yet to see anything from the Romneys that leads me to believe they get it.

          Caroline 4 years ago

          1 It does not matter
          2. It does not matter. It will not change Ann Romney, it will not change you. The only change that can ever occur is the changes you make for yourself and your kids if you have kids. It is a choice to work from home, it is a choice to stay home.
          We are all different. I am a single mom with 4 girls. When I put my girls to bed, I spend hours learning how to trade from free youtube videos. Now I trade for a living and work when I want too. Guess what it is a choice and we all have choices to make. Resenting someone because they have what you don’t have will never change your situation. I do believe poverty is a mindset and wealth is a mindset. You want to change it for your kids, there are opportunities out there. If you seek, you will find. Don’t wait for someone to give it to you. Get hold of Robert’s Kiyosaki’s book “rich dad poor dad”. Heck spend sometime on youtube and just listen to the audio copy its free. Someone has recorded and upload it on youtube. Don’t buy the narrative that the rich are evil. But again, poverty is a mindset. Which means you have the power to change it. I read a 14 year old girl just bought a foreclosed home for $12,000. She saved up $6,000. How she could sell things on ebay and with the help of her mother she searched out information on how to succeed on ebay. Tell, in a few years what will happen to this entrepreneurial mind? Sorry, but the millionaires and billionaires accusation I don’t buy it. I aspire to become a millionaire one day. But remember I am a stay home, single mom who decided to search out opportunities. I run my own trading website at the moment and tomorrow, someone will come and accuse me of not paying my fair share after all the sleepless nights working to get my business running? Don’t you see how outrageous this is? Anyway enough. If you ask me, I would rather be rich than poor. I don’t envy anyone. I know that if I set goals and take the necessary actions, God will bring the right people my path to make it in life. This is free video of Robert Kiyosaki teaching on the rules of
          money and how it changed since 1971 and 1974. Listen to it and listen over and over again. Here is the youtube link for you:

          DW 4 years ago


Stefanie 4 years ago

Amen, sister! Having been both a working mom and a SAHM at different points, each one has its challenges. But no matter which you choose (or have chosen for you), motherhood is indeed work. As I used to say as a SAHM when people asked me if I worked: harder than ever, and for no pay.

Recovering Supermom 4 years ago

Amen! Very well said.

    Virginia J. Chapman 3 years ago

    I am very grateful that I find your frequent publish here. Which seems to be very essential and it created fun successfully pass for me. I will always provide a awesome forced look in to you from my save nourish. I do not actually opinion and do not like to invest a while in writing the opinion. But here I have to do this because this should get a excellent like.

Brandy P 4 years ago


    Heather B 4 years ago

    ABSOLUTELY. No better word for it. Great article. Support each other in our decisions and our rights to make them? (what a novel idea!!!) What true feminism is.

Andrea Reiser 4 years ago

Bravo, Jill, BRAVO!


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