Living as a Mom in a Wheelchair

31 Comments

Priscilla-Hedlin

As a mom of three in a wheelchair, I draw plenty of attention.

I get questioned from little kids all the time; “Why can’t you walk?” “Are your legs broken?” or “Why are you in there?” 

At first, the mom or dad is just horrified and humiliated that their child would ask me such a question, but they start to relax the moment they see me smile.

I’ll usually start with something simple to see if that will pacify them. I simply state that my legs don’t work anymore. Kids, will be kids, though, so more often then not they ask, “Why?”.

I’ll usually twist my mouth a little and pretend to ponder their question as if it is the most important question ever. And it is; they really want to know.

I tell them that we all have nerves in our back that are kind of like a cord on a lamp, and my cord was cut, so it no longer works. The nerves send special signals to your legs and arms so they move but my legs don’t get the special signals anymore.

The child will usually look at me funny and just say, “oh, ok”. It’s almost always the exact same conversation. The same looks. The same reaction from the parents. Yet, each time it makes me proud to know that a child has learned that they can inquire about things. They can learn about different walks (or rolls) of life. Everybody is different yet we all share the same desire to be a part of each other’s worlds.

Parents: Please, let your child ask questions. Don’t be afraid of what someone will think. Chances are, they’re happy to tell your child why their hair is blue, or they have a scar down their face. They want to inform you but if you don’t ask, how will they know you care?

So how exactly do I chase three boys, while sitting in a wheelchair? I get asked variations on that questions fairly often and it’s not a question that I can really answer with words. I just do it. See for yourself…

 

Comments

The Scary Mommy Community is built on support. If your comment doesn't add to the conversation in a positive or constructive way, please rethink submitting it. Basically? Don't be a dick, please.

  1. 1

    says

    Priscilla is an AMAZING mom, and her husband an amazing husband and father! We were part of an online group before she was married, then when she was pregnant with both of her boys….she’s since had a 3rd. :)

    Show Replies
  2. 2

    says

    From the time I was a child my mother had problems walking. She had Charcot Marie Tooth disease. She went from all manners of braces to walker to wheelchair. She lost her leg from the knee down. And eventually was paralyzed from the waist down. She never let anything stop her. She had gardens, animals,and volunteered at the Red Cross, along with being a wonderful mother to 5 children and 11 grandchildren. While I was growing up kids and adults always looked at her funny and asked questions but I don’t think it bothered her too much or she just never let it show. My amazing mother lost her battle in 07 at only 56. I applaud all women that tackle life like this. Its not always easy but they give it their all. Thanks to all the moms who fight these similar battles everyday!

    Show Replies
    • 4

      kay says

      I have a mommy friend who is in a chair as well, and she puts ALL of us to shame! She is very active. Participates in marathons, travels to play in tennis tournaments and basketball competitions. She had a special bike made just for her to ride in a marathon. Trained for days on end, while her kids were in school. She is indeed a wonder woman!

      My hat off to you, Priscilla! Lord knows I would never have the strength and determination that you do!

      xoxo

      Show Replies
  3. 6

    Lawry says

    You go Mom….but I have always hated that how do you do it question…no matter what the situation is the answer is always the same…you live your life and just do! And thanks for reaffirming my philosophy about different types of people…I always tell my 6 yr old if he wants to know why someone is in a wheelchair or missing a limb etc to ask nicely and don’t just stare! We had such an encounter with a injured vet at the airport and I was in tears by the end of his conversation because he was so sweet to explain what happened (kid version of course) and my son’s reaction of Thank You and giving him an unsolicited hug just tore me up!

    Show Replies
  4. 9

    sammie says

    Thank you so much for sharing! I’m happy to read your post. I would initially be mortified as well to have my child be so forward, but like you pointed out it is important to let them inquire and learn. You rock, mama!

    Show Replies
  5. 10

    says

    I’m also in a wheelchair. My children who are now 19 , 18 and 16 find it hard to have a sick mom. They want a healthy mother, well I’d love to be healthy as well!! It’s tough being sick and a mom. My children have been in foster care for over 7 years because it’s classified as mental cruelty watching me in pain.

    Show Replies

Load More Comments

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

You may use these HTML tags and attributes: <a href="" title=""> <abbr title=""> <acronym title=""> <b> <blockquote cite=""> <cite> <code> <del datetime=""> <em> <i> <q cite=""> <strike> <strong>