Jill Smokler, AKA Scary Mommy
@scarymommy
Latest posts by Jill Smokler, AKA Scary Mommy (see all)
- The Disney Reveal - May 14, 2013
- Met My Match At Disney… - May 13, 2013
- Sunday’s Baltimore Sun - May 11, 2013
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Is your house cluttered, messy or in need of a makeover? Maisy is here to help!
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Open your doors to this five month old pup, and watch your belongings vanish in an instant!
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Your kid’s clothes will be ripped to shreds! Old magazines eaten like bacon! Furniture that needed updating anyway will literally disappear before your very eyes!
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Having trouble deciding which of your belongings to keep and which to toss? Maisy will swoop in without abandon and make that decision for you! No more hemming and hawing or sentimental attachment; Maisy will enter your home and immediately get to work. You’ll swear she’s a machine!
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You might question her choices, but don’t: There is a method to her madness! Those brand new jeans really weren’t all that flattering on you and your kid could certainly benefit from doing his or her homework three times. Maisy knows best!
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Maisy’s services are available daily from 9AM-4PM. Don’t delay!
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{Maisy will not be held responsible for the destruction of baseboards, rugs, photo albums, baby books, one of a kind antiques, school projects, manuscripts, expensive shoes, new winter coats, unread newspapers, rolls of toilet paper or important receipts. Use at your own risk.}
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{ 45 comments… read them below or add one }
Oh yeah, that sounds really familiar. The first year we had one of our dogs, the rescue we got her from (who had called for regular check-ins) sent us a card reading “Merry Christmas, and we hope your basement stairs survive the holidays”!
Eddie – The Usual Mayhem recently posted..Schoolhouse Crew review: Growing Up Wild
My big overgrown puppy is ready to go into “biznizz” with Maisy. I’m convinced that he is part dog, part goat. I’m a cat person who was talked into getting this dog. He’s sweet, he’s cute, but can’t be left alone with anything that he can get his big mouth around for more than 15 seconds.
The Sadder But Wiser Girl recently posted..The Recessive Gene: My Pool Needs A Lifeguard
This is why we adopt dogs that are at over the age of one.
Jacki recently posted..Celebrating Malala Yousafzai, A Brave Young Girl
Sounds like my world, ate through a vacuum power cord in about 30 seconds.
..and this is why I read your blog first thing every morning! Laughter IS the way to start the day! I have a blue heeler pup who steals socks from the laundry baskets, just socks,….now if only I could get him to put them in the washer….. Have a Great Day!
Dawn recently posted..It is Movie Time in Forney TX!
She totally gets away with everything doesn’t she?
So adorable.
Alison recently posted..A Tale of Two Americans. Okay, Many Americans
Oh how I can relate. My cute ass puppy is a pain in my ASS. Also 5 months. Why did we get puppies again???
My little demon is just over a year and has destroyed countless things – including the entire bottom of our boxspring mattress. Her latest fascination – pens & markers! Can’t tell you how many pairs of shoes she’s ruined.
But that sweet face & snuggly personality keeps her around!
THAT innocent face wreaking havoc? ;~)
If Maisy is looking to go bi-coastal with her service my 13 week old boxer can handle the west coast.
But look at that face!!!!!
Stephanie recently posted..Alphabet Photography: Elegance, Personalized
Oh man, I had that dog! You have my sympathies. Ours never got better and after he ate a mattress, a 50 foot hose, the wiring off our house, the bra off my husband’s car, and everything else he could get his mouth on, he started using my son for a chew toy. That’s when we showed him the door. He was a purebred Golden Retriever, so we found a breeder who would take him because no family in their right mind would adopt him. I’m hoping he calmed down after he got a bit older and had someone who was more experienced to train him. What a nightmare dog!
adrian recently posted..Thoughts on Election Eve 2012
I so remember those puppy days and crying when mine ate brand new black pumps .
Julia recently posted..Down the Shore Everything’s Going to Be Allright.
Awwwe!
We’ve done that, I have/had (she lives at my mothers, I used to too) a puppy named Baylee, she has stopped chewing stuff for the most part, but when she was a puppy… she chewed through the house.
My mother had to put her lead out farther from the house, because she chewed through the siding and insulation and drywall so that she could go in an out of the breezeway as she pleased! No door needed!
Ahhh, the joys of puppyhood! Our two rescue mutts, ages 1 and 3 yrs., have respectable “house cleaning” skills as well. The younger one has a “gift” with shoes, boots, flip flops, slippers, and anything foot related. The older one is practicing “interior design” with his uncanny gift on finding, slobbering on, and then leaving ALL throughout the house various stuffed animals. For every stuffed animal we find, however, he makes up for in the various wrappers, pencils, toilet paper rolls, food leftovers, etc. he quickly inhales never to be seen from again (unless puked on whatever carpet he can find if the mood strikes him.) With that said, as frustrating as it gets to keep track of two more moving, breathing bodies in our household, their addition of huggable, squeezable, furry, and fun love is worth it.
And with the added bonus that she’s adorable.
Jennifer recently posted..Morgan {Red Writing Hood}
Don’t forget Maisy’s Modeling Service…when you’re family & friends are fed up with your shutterbugging and run screaming whenever they see you wielding a camera, Maisy will save the day with her overwhelming cuteness, floppy ears and charming head tilts.
Her first cousin lives at my house. He’s a Boxer and chewed/ate everything he could get his teeth on.
That face!!!!!! Even so, I’ll pass. :)
That face. Oh my…
Rebeccah recently posted..My Political Coming Out
You know this will make moving soooo much easier. When can Maisy stop by?
Marta recently posted..Barcelona – Day 5
I keep hearing about how terrible toddlerhood can be terrible…I’ve survived 3 puppyhoods, so I’m wondering which is worse…? I have a 5 month old daughter. :)
I want that puppy!!!!!!! And I don’t believe a word of it. Look at that face!
She is pure amazingness.
Old School/New School Mom recently posted..The Dance – Back to Sixth Grade
Cutest dog ever! Our dog eats my daughters underwear…no joke! Our cocker spaniel will dig in her laundry basket and pull out her underwear.
And if anyone is wondering my daughter is 25 and she has probably replaced all of her underwear at least three times!
Lu recently posted..Goal Weight
When our puppy ate my 8 year-old’s toy that was recently bought at a bazaar, she was in the “doghouse.” I couldn’t really blame her, though, because the toy was made out of a dog biscuit!
Lynn Kellan recently posted..How I got my dog to stand still for 3 hours
yep. sounds familiar. when bella was a pup, she actually got into my purse and pulled out a couple important papers and shredded them. keep your purse zipped! nobody ever warns you about PUPPIES geting into your purse!
I haven’t given in to the “please get us a puppy” pleas yet. And I think I’m glad!
Shell recently posted..Good-Enough-to-Earn-Honorary-Southerner-Status Sweet Potato Casserole
Ugh, my dog is making me crazy right now!!!!!!!!!!!!
Holly@ClubThrifty recently posted..Dependent Care Flexible Spending Accounts (FSA)
I’m trying to purge my wardrobe of all the jeans that make my ass look huge. Do you think Maisy could swing by this weekend?
Kim at Not My Mom’s Blog recently posted..When Jake met Tilly…
hysterical and adorable. the best kind of post.
wendy @ mama one to three recently posted..Our Room With a View
I need her services for my husband’s closet. Maybe she knows how to deal with those old Iron Maiden t-shirts.
Tinne from Tantrums and Tomatoes recently posted..The holy grail of laundry : a visit from a – not so – distant past
Remember when all those moms said “enjoy every minute with the little ones, it goes by so fast”? Do puppies also fall into that category? I’m with you as we have a 4 month old puppy who is all teeth…
Tracy Larson recently posted..Helping a Man Understand Why We Have So Many Pairs of Shoes
You crack me up! I LOVE this. Thank God she’s cute, right?
Welcome to my world 3 years ago when our Golden Retriever was just a puppy. Marley Miles has eaten through rugs, chair legs, table legs, baseboards, homework (yes, my son told his teacher his dog ate his homework!) and I about lost it when he ate through the inside of my brown leather sofa. The one that can’t get dirty because it’s the color of crap! Send her to my house and my dog will take care of her & show her a few more tricks, I’m sure. ;)
Love Maisey!! I could use the company during the day!
Love Maisey!! I could use the company during the day!
But how much does she charge? And does she charge extra if I ask her to take out the trash?
Kiran@Masalachica recently posted..One Week Later
Oh, she is precious! But also, thanks for the reminder I don’t want a dog right now. LOL! I had a super crazy (psycho!) thought that it might be fun to surprise the kids with a puppy for Christmas (WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME!) but then I decided to wait until next year, or at least until my daughter is potty-trained. Like I need any more poop to clean up around here!
But wow, is she cute!
Carrie recently posted..Monday, Monday
Thank you very much for that gut check. We’re sticking with the hamster!
Johanna recently posted..Strippers, Catwomen of the Night and Cozy Cup Bras
Both my little wiener dogs are constantly cleaning up after my 2 year old.
Just too adorable. Hard to be mad at that face huh? Those milk teeth hurt huh!
Ah… I so don’t miss the puppy phase. I went through this phase twice and you’re not kidding… they chew EVERYTHING! You’ll learn real quick to pick up after yourselves :)
Nicole Martel recently posted..Elf on the shelf
Oh! Maisy is so cute! I wouldn’t mind if she’ll damage my belongings, I would love her to be my pet, my bestfriend. :)
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