The Multiple Personalities of a Tween Girl

The Multiple Personalities of a Tween Girl

I have a tween. A girl – the most savage of all tweenkind. My goal is to survive. Not win, just survive. When she turned 11 I thought, “I will be able to handle this. She’s only ONE little girl.” Now that she’s on the brink of 12, I realize she is not only one little girl. She is actually 7 multiple personalities ranging in age from 3 to 40…

1. The BFF Age: 35–40
This woman goes with me to get manicures, chats over lattes at Starbucks (always my treat), and goes out of her way to listen to my problems and help in any way possible. The BFF doesn’t come around very often but when she does you can hear the angels singing from above.

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2. The Sweetheart Age: 6
This is the sweetest, dearest little girl you will ever meet. She loves to snuggle and give kisses. She will climb up on the couch next to you on any given night just to tell you how much she loves you. She comes around even less than the BFF.

3. The Devil’s Twin Age: Unknown
This evil twin usually lurks around my house during late afternoon hours. She looks exactly like the BFF or the Sweetheart but when you speak to her burning acid shoots out of her mouth and does not stop until you flee the room, screaming profanities. Occasionally she rears her ugly head early in the morning so beware.

4. The Einstein/Miss Independent Age: 1120
This girl knows everything and can do everything herself. Everything. The easiest way to identify her is by her language. She only speaks two words, “I know.”

5. The Mature One Age: 1822
This is a young woman who knows how to handle herself. She tackles every chore with maturity. She does things without being asked. She engages in conversation with adults in a way that makes you consider admitting you are her parent. Unfortunately, she does not come around very often.

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6. The Baby Age: 35
Often confused with the Drama Queen, this child believes every single, itty, bitty, teeny, weeny injury is a near-death experience. She once asked to go to the emergency room because she bent her hair.

7. The Drama Queen Age: 1020
This girl is very similar to the Baby. However, she does not need to be injured to believe the world is ending. She only needs to be breathing. No clean jeans to wear? End of world. Can’t find her hairbrush? End of world. It’s Tuesday and she wants it to be Wednesday? End of world. Please note, the Drama Queen can instantly transform into the Devil’s Twin without any warning or notice.

That is everybody living in my daughter’s body. At least for today. I will be sure to let you know if anyone new moves in when she reaches the ripe old age of 12.

Lord help me.

Related post: 5 Tips For Raising a Tweenaged Daughter

About the writer

Abi blogs about all things creative, her DIY addiction, and random other bits of family life. Laugh along with her at


Tonya 2 weeks ago

OMG you just described my 10 1/2 yr old to a TEE!! Lord help us all!!

Shannon 2 weeks ago

I think the teens and tweens are crazy. I saw at least 3 of the personalities when I asked my daughter to do the dishes. The sweet angel saw the dishes and did them without asking, that was in the morning. By the afternoon, she had dishes of her own in the sink. When I asked her to wash them, her head spun around and she began to speak in a demonic tongue. By the end of the night, she was so flustered from washing the two dishes she had, she began to tell me that I wasn’t fair and that I didn’t appreciate her. I work 40+ hours a week. I buy the food, dishes, utensils, soap, and dish clothes. I often restrain choking the life out of her because I have a good friend in the cabinet named Chianti, who keeps me sane. I tell her, after one of many of her outburst, that she should be lucky. There were many times that I thought of doing a WWF wrestling move on her. Appreciate that!

neil 2 months ago


Elizabeth 3 months ago

The photo of the little girl posted with the article looks exactly like my youngest granddaughter who is 7. That being said, this article pretty much sums up my oldest granddaughter who is eleven and will turn twelve in December. Occasionally my husband and I watch all three of our granddaughters (ages 7, 8 and 11) for three or four days at a time while our daughter and her husband are away on a short vacation. The eleven-year-old has momentarily behaved in such a way that I almost had to call in an exorcist! Just kidding, but close! She’s a smart girl, pretty and a good student, but God help us at times as we patiently wait for her to grow up and out of these difficult growing-up years.

janet 4 months ago

I second the suggestion to add the crazy wackadoodle who has all the energy of the world bursting out at any given moment.

Sonia 4 months ago

Perfect!! Nothing else to say

Jeanine 4 months ago

I loved this article. Perfect description of a tween.

Annoyed 5 months ago

Honestly, people if you have nothing nice to say don’t waste your precious time. Putting people down for posting something they think might help is just bullying. Grow up! I am sure this article will help more than it will hurt. If your going to pass judgement on something look at yourself for the comments you are going to leave. If putting people down makes you feel better I would really not want to see how your kids are behind your back.

Karen 5 months ago

Sounds like poor parenting to me! I have two tweens and a teen and I assure you that talking back and “devil twin” behavior only lasts a matter of minutes because it is dealt with quickly and effectively! But if writing an article about your poor parenting choices makes you feel better, more power to you!

Claudia 5 months ago

Sounds exactly like my little girl, except she’s only 7!!! Can’t wait to find out what she’ll be like at 11!

Layla 5 months ago

that was worth the read. Stephen King meets Tina Fey. I have a tween boy, but the struggle is real here as well!

Christy 5 months ago

I have twin 11 year old girls. Your personality profiles are very accurate. There is also at least 1 more personality at my house, sort of an Einstein/drama queen hybrid that only comes out when your sister is talking. About anything. Absolutely anything she says is a cause for sniping, arguing or refuting. I hope I make it to 18!

Rebecca 6 months ago

Glad to know I’m not the only one going through this lol, you perfectly described my 12 year old

Stephanie 9 months ago

after I laughed, I had my 11yr old read this. She said she definitely recognized the Einstein personality as well as the personality the comes out right after school. She did want to know where the Crazy Wackadoodle personality is. It’s true these girls can get very very silly.

Prontip 9 months ago

Tween? Sister it doesn’t end there. My oldest is 16 and it seems like an additional personality shows up every year.

Naomi 9 months ago

I have 3 girls… triplets… And I know I’m in for it. They are 5 and there is already so much drama!

Holly 9 months ago

Thank you so much for this article, I thought mine was just trying to drive everyone in the house crazy!!!! Needed to know other moms were dealing with this “stage” too!

Lani 9 months ago

LMAO! I can totally relate! (I am also the mom of a 12 year old.) I can maybe add a few personalities as well!

Your Momma 9 months ago

Hmm. Lattes for a twelve year old. Just can’t begin to imagine why her personality changes. Go figure.

Tracy 9 months ago

I was just asking my husband if he thought all 12 year olds were like my daughter. Apparently yes! God help us.

Annie 9 months ago

I used to say that I wish they had something similar to the temperature tape that you could put on their forehead, only it would tell me what age she was at that particular moment! Single mom with two redheaded females 15 months apart. They are now both in college – I survived!

Cathy Sheridan 9 months ago

this is great information about the difficulties of growing up. You don’t know where you belong, who you are or what your interests are. I think the best lesson learned is to never stop loving your daughter! Be there for them and never make them feel like their opinion doesn’t count. Also, each of us know that some day they will have a daughter as well. Empower them!!!


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