Never The Same Again



A friend of mine had her first baby a month after my second was born. She’s since been saying on Facebook how different things are now that she’s a mother. How her back hurts. How it sucks to still carry ten extra pounds.

And she asked, when will I feel myself again?

I told her, NEVER. You will never be the same again.

Your back will always be a little achy.

Your boobs will always be a little saggy.

Your stomach will always be a little poochy.

Your hips will always be a little wider.

Advertisement - Continue Reading Below

Your hair, your skin, your bladder control – they will all never be what it was before, whether for better or worse.

You will never sleep the same again.

You might not get out of a nursing bra for a while.

You won’t be using the bathroom alone for a few years.

You might find yourself talking about poop a lot more than you expect.

You will never have crumb-less floors again.

You might not wear something that’s not stained for a couple of years.

You might not get your nails done or your hair cut as often as you did.

You probably won’t get all the laundry done, or the dishes washed, every single day.

Yes, all that.

Advertisement - Continue Reading Below

But what I did not tell her, is this.

Your smile will always be wider.

Your laughter will always be more joyful.

Your eyes will always be brighter.

Your arms will always be full.

Your heart will always be walking out of your chest.

Your love will always be bigger.

So no, after you birth a child (or two, or three, or four and more), you will never be the same again.

But it’s ok, because you won’t want to be.


The Scary Mommy Community is built on support. If your comment doesn't add to the conversation in a positive or constructive way, please rethink submitting it. Basically? Don't be a dick, please.

    • Katia says

      Beautifully put, Alison, and I mean both your post and the comment to Jill. I agree with every word in your post. A friend of mine put it this way – your heart literally expands with each child and that is what you describe here. Lovely!

      Show Replies
  1. Kristin says

    I don’t know if my smile is always a little bit wider – unless it’s because I’m manic due to lack of sleep and too much caffeine. But my heart walking out of my chest? Oh yes.

    Thanks for sharing, Alison! And thanks for sharing the space, Jill!

    Show Replies
  2. Mamarific says

    Aw, so true, so true! And you said it so well. “Smile will always be wider” is my favorite. Thanks for making me feel better about my aching back and poochy tummy on a Saturday night.

    Show Replies
  3. Leslie says

    More well-put truths from Alison! I don’t even remember what a truly clean & organized house looks like anymore. But someday the kids will be grown and the mess all gone, and these early days will be the ones we long for.

    Show Replies

Load More Comments

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

You may use these HTML tags and attributes: <a href="" title=""> <abbr title=""> <acronym title=""> <b> <blockquote cite=""> <cite> <code> <del datetime=""> <em> <i> <q cite=""> <strike> <strong>