08 · 19 · 2010

I’m not pregnant

I’m not pregnant. The three tests with cross expressions on their faces that are sitting in my bathroom trash confirmed it.

Considering that I have an IUD siting snugly in my uterus this should come as no surprise.

But, I woke up yesterday feeling like shit. My stomach was bubbly and crampy and I had heartburn radiating from my chest. Plus, I’ve been exhausted for weeks.

I bet you’re pregnant, Jeff suggested.

No, I responded. Impossible. I just had one too many Fiber One bars. And, I better not be. We cannot have a baby now.

But as the day wore on, I became less sure.

I cried at the end of Hotel for Dogs. I drank lemon tea and toast. I brainstormed just how we were going to tell the kids that we had to get rid of the puppy, but they would get a new sibling instead. I drafted announcement blog posts in my head. I found myself protecting my belly as Evan pounced on top of it. I cuddled with him on the couch and for one brief moment thought it might not be so bad to have another.

But, Jeff brought home a pack of tests and each of them instantly resulted in a single straight line.

This is a good thing. I would have been in hysterics if they were positive. We cannot afford a baby. It would have been a mess.

I just wish I didn’t feel so disappointed.

{ 113 comments }

1 JenEverAfter August 20, 2010 at 3:23 pm

I recently went through the ordeal of finding out that my IUD was purchased illegally from Canada by my doctor’s office. In any case, I was informed that the FDA could “not guarantee effectiveness” for devices that do not have FDA approval. And hubby and I had had quite a lot of “action” the week before I found out – precisely the week I was ovulating. Wow! With a 3 yo and a 1 yo already at home, I went through the same emotions, “it’d be stupid to have a baby so soon!” “Hubby’s going to be gone most of next year, it’d be stupid to have a baby now!” But ohmygosh, I really, really, REALLY wanted to be preggo. Cause hubs is fine with the two we’ve got, and I’m on the fence about a third. And if it was an accident, then it wouldn’t be anybody’s idea or anybody’s fault, it would be like the universe telling you you HAVE to have another baby, you know? Anyway, that was a few months ago, the IUD is out (it was the real brand, but still from Canada), I am very definitely NOT preggo, and I was very, very sad about that. Eventually, when we decide for sure that we’re done, hubs is getting snipped, and then I won’t have worry about “accidents” anymore. (Of course, with our luck…..)
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2 Sunday August 20, 2010 at 5:43 pm

I know exactly how you feel. Truly, I do.
I cannot imagine how having another baby would turn my world upside down (when I already feel upside down as it is).
And yet, the times when I have felt sure I was I felt such a let down when the pregnancy test said No.

3 amy August 22, 2010 at 8:33 am

I have been there and done that.. only the original tests said not pregnant but three weeks later I had a positive test when I still felt like poop.. My IUD baby will be 4 in November… Hope that doesn’t scare you.. Just sharing the whole IUD scare, I apparently am not a candidate for IUDs because they like to dislodge on me

4 Tiaras August 23, 2010 at 1:39 pm

I peed on sticks for over 2 years . . always one damn line . . . seriously messes with one’s head! Sadly, I gave up . . . went on the pill last month . . my Dr suggested IUD, but it freaked me out a bit . . . do you really like it? And I see from your mass of hair that your hair did NOT fall out? I heard that is a side effect and I seriously have lost enough of my hair in the pat year to satisfy me forever – that is all!
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5 Melissa S August 24, 2010 at 5:22 pm

I recently had a little “scare”… my daughter 2 1/2 and son was 8 mnths and I thought no way. Plus I was recently unemployed. By the end of the day and thoughts of the baby names I didn’t get to use and all the baby things we already had I was disappointed. So silly how can you be disappointed for something you never even had? I guess once a mommy always a mommy… it’s funny, we know that maybe it is not a good idea at the time but once the thought is planted you are already in love… so sorry.

6 Lindsay @ Just My Blog August 27, 2010 at 8:36 am

I’ve been there…Done that…Last week, as a matter of fact. I hated that I was disappointed.
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7 Natalie August 28, 2010 at 3:31 pm

I know exactly what you mean. I have 3 beautiful kids. We’re in a great place & having a newborn right now isn’t in the cards. I even have an IUD to make sure it doesn’t happen. But there are still random moments where I think I might be & still feel a twinge of disappointment when I realize I’m not.
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8 Isobel August 30, 2010 at 8:27 am

Us moms are just wired that way, no matter how overwhelming our parenting lives can get we still get excited at the thought of having a new baby. I can totally relate to how you feel.
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9 Krystle @snarkykisses September 2, 2010 at 1:50 pm

I’ve had the same thing happen, a few times.

The anticipation of testing… the frantic water drinking… the one thing that you didn’t need or want right now suddenly didn’t seem so bad.

And then you pick up the test to see “Not Pregnant” and a little piece inside crumbles to the ground.

10 vitazen September 20, 2010 at 5:47 pm

Goodness, I thought I was the only one! I have taken 3 pregnancy tests this month and all negative, relieving but disappointing at the same time? I know I’m not pregnant I can’t be even though my husband had a vasectomy reversal a couple months ago the doc said it didn’t look good although he gave us a 40% chance it “might” work we will know in 4 months to a year (wtf?) I am going in freaking sane! My body is a mess my emotions a mess and aunt flo should be arriving by Wednesday(fingers crossed) and still I keep feeling like I might be pregnant. But i’m not 3 tests all negative. Yeah ok I could be taking them early I don’t want to be pregnant but it’s not a big deal because he can’t get me pregnant or maybe he can or most likely he can’t everything I’m feeling is just hysterics but I want a baby but then when I think of it I don’t want a baby I couldn’t handle it right now I already have three and they are older do I really want to start over again?… but then I think I could and so yeah I feel you! It was soooooooo much easier when I was wishing his vasectomy would fail every once in a blue moon and then I would get over it and not have to deal with it. Now well i’m on that oh my freaking goodness roller coaster! I Just love being a woman, yet sometimes I don’t…..whew feel so much better now that I got that off my chest…I think I just need a nap or maybe a drink but I shouldn’t til aunt flo comes because well you never know… ;)~

11 Vasectomy Reversal Surgery March 19, 2011 at 4:00 pm

I know…its like: OMG!! really!!?!? and If we considered only the financial implications of having children, we might end up childless. There’s no two ways about it: having a child is very expensive. Financial experts say a home is the biggest investment most people will ever make, but even when this is a fact, their eyes looking at us, their smile, and all their love..it worth every cent! XOXO

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