Kim Bongiorno
Latest posts by Kim Bongiorno (see all)
- Parental Language, Decoded - January 25, 2013
- The Three Bed Solution - July 17, 2012
We do so much for our kids because we love them to bits. We dive under them at playgrounds, let them dress us like gaudy princess bunnies while we crouch in makeshift forts, and tell them all day long how smart, funny, handsome, insightful, beautiful and awesome they are.
And, then there are the times when we’re at our wit’s end and have things we want to say, but can’t do so directly. So we say something completely different to what we’re really thinking. Something exponentially kinder than what’s dancing at the tip of our tongues.
Like these…
We Say: “We’ll see.” … We Mean: “Not likely, so quit asking.”
We Say: “No, we’re not there yet.” … We Mean: “Ask again and we’ll arrive with you tied to the roof racks.”
We Say: “Wanna play with my iPhone?” … We Mean: “If I give this to you, will you let me drink my coffee in peace?”
We Say: “Mm-hmm.” (With eye contact) … We Mean: “How long must I nod for you to go away?”
We Say: “Mm-hmm.” (Without eye contact) … We Mean: “I’m so not listening to you.”
We Say: “Wow, really?” … We Mean: “I have no friggin’ clue what you just said.”
We Say: “Are you sure about that?” … We Mean: “You are wrong or delusional. Rethink whatever you just said or did.”
We Say: (Silent, blatant ignoring) … We Mean: “I’m trying not to yell at you. For your own sake, stop speaking and walk away.”
We Say: “Go ask Mommy/Daddy.” … We Mean: “Go bother somebody else.”
{ 36 comments… read them below or add one }
I just used this one:
“Mm-hmm.” (Without eye contact)
While taking the time to read this post. LOVE IT – and so so true! :)
Anna @ My Life and Kids recently posted..How to Make Fart Sounds
See? It’s like a reference tool. We should all hang cheat sheets of it in our kitchens.
Kim at Let Me Start By Saying recently posted..The Kids You’ll See at Your Kids’ School Concert
So, so true!!! Don’t let the kids find this!
Or maybe they SHOULD know when to walk away?? Hmmm….
Kim at Let Me Start By Saying recently posted..The Kids You’ll See at Your Kids’ School Concert
My kids are totally on to me. Did you clue them in?! :)
Ah, finally! Perceptive kids! My sincerest apologies.
Kim at Let Me Start By Saying recently posted..The Kids You’ll See at Your Kids’ School Concert
i just used the blatant ignore. my kid got detention again and he is trying to convince me that he didn’t laugh at the teacher when she told him to stop talking. i may beat him yet today lol
The blatant ignore should come with some sort of flashing warning light for our kids. Seriously.
Kim at Let Me Start By Saying recently posted..The Kids You’ll See at Your Kids’ School Concert
I say “we’ll see.” about 10 times per day. You think they’d have it figured out by now, but no.
Audrey recently posted..Better living through chemistry
Mine have! After the traditional “we’ll see”, one of them says, “That means no”, followed by “so, can I?” REALLY?!? I just say “I answered you.” and ignore them when they continue.. :)
My daughter’s friend told her & her brother in the car once “When your mom says “we’ll see” it means “no.” I know that because that’s what MY mom means when SHE says it”
Smart kid.
Kim at Let Me Start By Saying recently posted..The Kids You’ll See at Your Kids’ School Concert
I really need to start using “Wow, Really?” instead of “Oh, that’s great” when I have no idea what they said. Sometimes they tell me things like “My brother just hit me.”
Melissa recently posted..My Top 5 Behavior Busters for Kids Behaving Badly
This is why I changed it to a more neutral response!
Kim at Let Me Start By Saying recently posted..The Kids You’ll See at Your Kids’ School Concert
“Sweetieface” = “You are really bugging the $%^# out of me right now, but I’m too good a parent to lose my temper over it… for now.”
LOL! I love how syrupy that term is, and how angry it actually is.
Kim at Let Me Start By Saying recently posted..The Kids You’ll See at Your Kids’ School Concert
“we’ll see” and the “mhmm” without eye contact get used a lot here, but right now a great one for me is “Once i get your baby brother settled in and get done everything i need to, then we can….” lol they’ve learned that there is no such thing as everything is done, when i start listing everything i need to do they just walk away!
Jen recently posted.."For the love of god, leave your nipples alone!!"
“Once I do…these thousand things…” yeah, I so know that story, lol!
Kim at Let Me Start By Saying recently posted..The Kids You’ll See at Your Kids’ School Concert
Yes, yes, yes! To all of the above. Crap, I hope they don’t figure out what I really mean when I say all of these things. Especially with the iPhone b/c I really need my coffee!
Meredith recently posted..Love Letter to Summer Days
The iPhone one is stellar, and pretty much will always work EVEN if they figure out our game!
Kim at Let Me Start By Saying recently posted..The Kids You’ll See at Your Kids’ School Concert
“Wow…really?” Hahahah! That is life with my son right now as he’s still learning to talk.
Yes! My 5yo has had this alien-chicken voice for years (she was a early talker) and half the stuff she says sounds like it’s from another planet. We’ve Wow/Really’d her a gazillion times.
Kim at Let Me Start By Saying recently posted..The Kids You’ll See at Your Kids’ School Concert
This is so true. Especially, “We’ll see.” My husband and I use “We’ll see,” all of the time. My kids should really have it figured out by now. But alas, no. Well, at least not the younger one.
Nicole(Whole Strides) recently posted..Amazing easy black beans, and using what you have
We’ll see = No way, Jose.
Kim at Let Me Start By Saying recently posted..The Kids You’ll See at Your Kids’ School Concert
I use go ask daddy all the time, but then they come back to me because he is clueless. Then I usually resort to one of the other responses. You know now that I think about it, these responses are pretty true for husbands as well as kids.
Say Go Ask Daddy THEN HIDE. Problem? Solved.
Kim at Let Me Start By Saying recently posted..The Kids You’ll See at Your Kids’ School Concert
My kids definitely know that, “we’ll see” means “no”. While “are you sure about that” means, “you’d better rethink what you just said and/or did before I throttle you.”
Throttling threats without using the word “throttling” are the very best kind.
Kim at Let Me Start By Saying recently posted..The Kids You’ll See at Your Kids’ School Concert
We’ll see is my go-to response. One time Hubby busted me by actually telling the boys, “That means ‘no’.”
Kathy at kissing the frog recently posted..Could I Love Them Too Much?
Your husband deserves a time out for that.
Kim at Let Me Start By Saying recently posted..The Kids You’ll See at Your Kids’ School Concert
My favorite is “Not right now.” Translation–No and never. My feeble attempt at preventing a meltdown from a toddler that’s just heard No.
My preferred response to “can I have another juice box (candy, cookie, etc)?”
“I’m not offering that right now. How about water or milk?” Another way to say no, and again for the very same reason.
Oh my gosh my mom used these all the time! I hear myself using them with mu husband even now.
Ashley recently posted..Creamy tomato capalini with a lemon arugula salad
My own mom used “we’ll see” ALL the time. I swore I would never say it but I do, on a daily basis.
murphy must have had kids recently posted..Just Keep Swimming (Murphy’s Law #15)
Haha. I do these. Sometimes I just want to be left alone.
Mercy recently posted..Move Progress Update
Ha! Yes! The Mhhmm and Wow Really? Get used a lot in this house lol.
What ever you do, PLEASE don’t tell my kids that “Wow really?” means. Because I say it a lot! :-)
Victoria KP recently posted..Thrifty Tasty Tuesday: Tortellini with Peas
Friggin Brilliant…of course, I think my kids have figured out most of the code, and they are only 3 and 5 :) I may need to get more creative with my responses. In fact, my son says “I don’t like it when you talk like that.” That is what he says when he thinks I am not paying attention, and I am just agreeing with anything he says. Damn these perceptive children :)
Heidi Bryan recently posted..Mental note…my son can read