Insane Works of Sandwich Art

36 Comments

You know how Pinterest can make you feel like a slacker mother whose cooking and homemaking and craft skills don’t compare with all the other mothers out there? Well, today for a change, it made me feel normal. No way would any sane mother present sandwiches like these to her children…

mermaid sandwichcow sandwich nemo sandwich art flower sandwich
piano sandwich

boat sandwich art
sun sandwich mouse sandwich artbutterfly sandwichface sandwich

crab sandwich art

Somehow, I think my kids will survive on plain old peanut butter and jelly just fine.

Plus, I won’t end up institutionalized when they chuck the masterpiece I spent three hours on directly into the trash can. Slacker moms for the win!

Comments

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  1. 2

    Wendy says

    I don’t know if the idea of eating half that stuff is bothering me more or if thinking about how much was wasted is bothering me more. A rat?? Yuck.

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  2. 6

    Chris says

    Who has to work THAT hard to get their kids to eat?!? And you just know there’s some kid who whines “But I wanted a castle, not a pirate ship!” and refuses to eat anyway.

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  3. 7

    Janine Huldie says

    Or on the floor, too!! Seriously, what kind of person made these and they must not have little kids, because every time I try to do anything I get interrupted about 20 times before I just give up on a even a good day!!

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  4. 12

    Heather says

    I can barely get the pop tarts in the toaster let alone craft some bullshit food like that! I try…I really do… I just have this block or something. True Story : I wrote a blog post about my horrible breakfast making skills, and after school pick up I was talking to my 12. yr. old on the drive home. It went like this… Me: I wrote a blog post about how bad I am at making food. The 12. yr. old : Yeah…well my friend’s mom packs him sauteed veggies for lunch every day. Me : How the heck does she send veggies to school?? The 12 yr. old : Tupperware mom, she uses tupperware. Me : blink, blink, blink…

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    • 15

      Keline says

      You’re not a loser, you ‘re just too busy parenting! Pinterest is the opposite of original – it ‘s where people go to take others’ creative ideas (and usually fail at replicating them). I’m a wedding planner, and Pinterest is the bane of my existence. You want a thousand paper-folded cranes hanging from the 80ft ceilings of the historic church you booked? That sounds great! Who’s doing it for you? (Cuz I sure as hell ain’t!!)

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  5. 16

    Kat says

    I cannot imagine spending the time on any of these; not to mention how much food gets wasted when you cut these shapes out. These days, my kids are old enough that I tell them to make their own damn sandwiches or be hungry. They usually just slap two pieces of bread together with peanut butter in between, maybe some jam or honey too if they’re feeling fancy.

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  6. 18

    Jessica says

    Well, damn. I thought I was doing some pretty impressive work with the cookie cutters. And seriously? I find that to be a complete pain in the ass. My kids think its a special holiday when I bust out a train cookie cutter for their PB&J.

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  7. 22

    Anita@ Losing Austin says

    I don’t even make regular boring ones anymore! My 9 year old is told to make his and his brother’s. So I couldn’t be further from that junk!

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  8. 23

    KMarrs says

    In all fairness, The Bloggess would probably want to craft the armadillo (or maybe it is a rat?) for her daughter. But, that isn’t saying she could. Either way, only Jenny could get away with that.

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  9. 24

    stacey says

    Wait…we are supposed to FEED them too? I just let my kids find something in the pantry if they are hungry. If one of them wants to make ME a mermaid sandwhich…I’ll be sitting in my easy chair watching Hoarders. ;)

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  10. 25

    Amy says

    Okay..so these are clever…and cute. But I know there is no way I would attempt anything like this…unless perhaps it’s to take a photo of my version next to the original for a good laugh.
    I learned my lesson already about trying to do stuff like this, never again :D

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  11. 26

    ButteryMuffyn says

    Take two slices of bread, slap on some butter, coat liberally with Marmite and cut in half. Done. Sometimes, it doesn’t even get cut in halk.

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  12. 27

    ButteryMuffyn says

    Take two slices of bread, slap on some butter, coat liberally with Marmite and cut in half. Done. Sometimes, it doesn’t even get cut in half.

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