Jill Smokler, AKA Scary Mommy
Latest posts by Jill Smokler, AKA Scary Mommy (see all)
- Dear Judgy Mothers on My Website… - June 15, 2013
- 10 Skills Every Mother Should Possess - June 10, 2013
- Perfection (Or pretty close) - June 3, 2013
Rachel can be found blogging about letting go and living life at www.handsfreemama.com. Make her day and follow her on Facebook by liking “The Hands Free Revolution”.
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The other night, I read an piece from No Regrets Parenting entitled, “How To Spend More Quality Time With Your Child.” In the first paragraph, Dr. Rotbart suggests that rather than struggling to increase the quantity of time you spend with your family, focus on increasing the quality of memorable moments with them.
YES.
That is one powerful parenting approach this “Hands Free Mama” can applaud. Every week on my blog, I share my attempts to momentarily let go of daily distraction and connect to what really matters in life. And whether I go “Hands Free” for two minutes or two hours, the impact it has on my relationship with my children is profound.
It appeared that Dr. Rotbart and I shared a similar parenting philosophy, so I continued reading. I had no idea I was about to get a glimpse of something far worse than the sight of a nit on a hair shaft or the contents of a sippy cup of milk after four months under the bed.
In fact, mid-way through the article, I looked down and wondered if that was sweat or tears filling the spaces between my computer keys. And surely those guttural sobbing noises I was hearing were not coming from me.
What was going on here?
Well, I can tell you; it was this line: “There are only 940 Saturdays between a child’s birth and her leaving for college. That may sound like a lot, but how many have you already used up? If your child is 5 years old, 260 Saturdays are gone. Poof!”
Whoa. Hold on a minute, Dr. Rotbart. Did you just tell me I only have 680 Saturdays left with my youngest child?
Given the fact that the doctor used the pronoun “her” and the example age of 5, it did seem that he was, in fact, personally delivering this bad news to me.
And I wasn’t taking it well.
In fact, the further I read into the article, the more emotional my reaction became. I felt my eyes and mouth grotesquely contort into the “ugly cry face.” You know the one: snot runs down your nose into your mouth, and you don’t even care because you’re so distraught.
Blame the hysterical breakdown on this paragraph: “Picture their tousled bedrooms as clean and empty. See the backseat of the car vacuumed and without a car seat or crumbs … Then rewind the imaginary clock back to now, and see today’s minutes of mayhem for what they are: finite and fleeting.”
The thought of Express Car Wash Guy no longer needing to call in back up with hazmat suits when I pulled up actually made my lip quiver. I couldn’t bear to imagine the day my car would be void of treasures like a fossilized teething biscuit from 2001 or the beloved one-armed Polly Pocket that I thought we left poolside at Holiday Inn in 2005.
I realized I was TOTALLY missing the positive message of the article. Yet, I couldn’t get past the fact that I had been living my life unaware of the fact that there is an exact number of Saturdays before my kids permanently leave the house.
I cursed the hospital staff for neglecting to inform me that my newborn baby came with “minutes,” just like a pre-paid phone card. And just as one who had carelessly wasted calling minutes by drunk-dialing, making prank phone calls, and multi-tasking while talking, I felt desperate to get those minutes back.
But it was hopeless.
I could envision the sour faced sales manger of “Minutes With Your Children,” shaking her unsympathetic head at me.
“I am sorry, Ma’am. You HAD 940 on your card and now you only have 680. I cannot give you a refund just because you now decide you shouldn’t have spent your credits bitching and moaning about lack of sleep, dirty clothes on the floor, and not being able to go to the bathroom by yourself.”
I was sobbing uncontrollably now. I didn’t know how I would break it to my husband. How could I tell him we had a deficit of 260 on “the card” for our youngest child? (And God only knows the even smaller number of minutes left on “the card” for our oldest child.)
But I never had the chance to tell him.
As soon as my backside hit the couch where my husband sat, my older child came wandering in. Having been asleep for several hours, she was squinty eyed, groggy, and had hair sticking up in ten different directions—she never looked so beautiful.
My child then spoke three words, which up until the moment I heard the ticking clock of “Saturdays Gone By,” were the LAST words I ever wanted to hear at 10 p.m. when I finally sat down to relax.
“I can’t sleep,” she gurgled and then burst into tears.
I bolted from my seat as if she had just announced they were giving out free chair massages and margaritas in her room. I didn’t even consider debating with my husband about whose turn it was to tuck in the unwelcomed sleepwalker. What was happening at that moment was a dream come true. I was being given some time back on “the card;” I was receiving the impossible refund!
As my child and I laid in the darkness of her bedroom, I began rubbing her tummy just like I did when she was a baby. Immediately, I wondered how many “Belly Rub Credits” were left on “the card.” Determining that she was almost 9 and might possibly decide at ANY DAY she is too old for this, I proceeded to rub until my arm lost all feeling and bordered on permanent nerve damage.
Soon my child was breathing heavily in a peaceful slumber. I studied her face. After all, she was still here, under my roof, in my care. In 680 Saturdays, she’d be getting ready to head out of her college dorm room without a coat wearing shoes that would eventually lead to back problems. After drinking “Boones Farm” straight from the bottle, she would dance all night with a gaggle of friends, and then eat a non-organic hot dog handled by a street vendor who very rarely washed his hands.
Needless to say, I cried myself to sleep that night.
The next day, my mental state had not improved. My thought process centered around “the card.” How many more episodes of Little House on the Prairie will we watch together before my kids stage a revolt and demand iCarly? How many more times will I watch her sweetly pluck the strings on her tiny ukulele before she dyes her hair pink and decides to play the drums?
While some of my new “awareness” was causing positive behavior change, thinking in terms of the time I had left was making me feel sad. It was also preventing me from living in the moment, which is what my “Hands Free” journey is all about.
I decided to take a moment to look inward. Why was I having such an intense feeling about the information in this article? Why did Dr. Rotbart’s message strike such a chord in me?
Maybe because the other morning, she made her own scrambled egg all by herself.
Maybe because the two of them walked to a neighbor’s house down the street and kindly told me they wouldn’t need me to accompany them anymore.
Maybe because while shopping for spring clothes they informed me they only wanted to match on “special occasions” from now on.
Maybe because we recently boxed up books to take to Goodwill, and they had no trouble tossing in beloved favorites that had been read to them at least a thousand times.
Maybe when the two of them sing in the car, I strain to detect one ounce of baby voice in their musical stylings and hear none.
Maybe because time is fleeting and I can feel it, see it, mourn it … so much more than I could in the long, exhausting baby days.
Maybe because my kids don’t need me as much anymore, and I realize this is just the start of what’s to come.
Although I know calculating how much time I have on “the card” is not a healthy, nor is it a productive way to live, I don’t regret reading that article. I needed the wake up call it produced. I needed to be shaken and reminded that having to sweep up the crumbs beneath their chairs every single night is not really a “problem.”
I needed to be reminded that each time she still grasps my hand as we cross a busy street or asks me to “c‘mere” so she can show me a ladybug are moments to stop and savor.
I needed to be reminded that despite all the positive changes I’ve made in my “Hands Free” journey, I could complain a bit less, cherish a bit more, let go of the have-tos and live a little more.
Because God knows, that day will come when I stand inside her closet, and I will be able to see the floor. There will be no brightly-colored clothes haphazardly hung from hangers along the narrow walls, no dirty clothes that had missed the mark of the hamper.
And I will place my hand on all that is left. And when I do, I will be so grateful that I hugged her that day rather than scolding her for writing her name on the wall of the closet.
That day was Saturday #286. It was the day I realized time was fleeting, and a moment of exasperation is as much a gift of time as is a moment of joy; it just comes without the pretty packaging.
{ 65 comments… read them below or add one }
This post was beautiful!
My only son is 9 months old now and after a particularly trying night getting him down to sleep this is just what I needed :)
I want to go in and hug him, even though he took almost two hours to get down tonight.
The 1 am feeding will come soon enough. Thank you for putting it in perspective.
Kristin recently posted..A Pampers Takedown
Wow, this really struck close to home for this dad. My wife and two daughters have been at the in laws for a week now.
While it was a nice relaxing week, I’m not going to lie, it still feels like a week wasted. A week without bedtime stories, a week without snuggling a chilly toddler after her bath, a week without the random babbling that only the mind of a two year old can produce.
One more day then they come home! I’m going to start trying to make each Saturday better than the last, all the way up until #940!
Chris @ CleverFather recently posted..12 Crazy Things Your Baby is Thinking About
This post struck home for many reasons. The most obvious being that I am constantly struck by how fleeting my moments are with my boys. I catch myself trying to polaroid these moments in my mind, but I’m too aware that my “film” is not so good!
Also loved the reference to Boone’s Farm, straight from the bottle.
Tanya Doyle recently posted..Guest Post on RescueYouth.com
Here’s to letting it go and living it up! My oldest is 9 and when she hits the big 1 0 it will be tough but she will be so happy. Now we know what our parents and grandparents meant when they wisely said ” enjoy it while it lasts, they don’t stay little very long” sigh…
This is a beautiful post! I have a 7 month old son and this post made me count my credit left! Amazing post. Loved it!
Oh hell. Even though this was a beautiful post, I shouldn’t have read it. I just realized I only have about 20 more Saturdays with my only child before he heads of to college!
Gigi recently posted..And THAT is how I found myself creating a tutorial about indoor fountains.
Yep, I’ve got a sophomore in high school, so we don’t have many Saturdays left before college. I keep offering to “homeschool” her for grades 13-16, but she’s not interested. Go figure…
Lynn from For Love or Funny recently posted..How I became a thousand-aire
Little did I know that our lives would never be the same after August. It was the most heartbreaking gut renching HORIFFIC time in my life, husband’s and siblings life. I knew I was getting signal,after signal of warnings in a way but my mind would say thats ok because of what ever. LQQK for distractions that were always in the way. Losing a child to murder is the the worst nightmare a stay at home mommy any mommy can even begin to try and endure. Our youngest son 16 is usually always with us and he took it the hardest of them all. His chronic illness kicked back in. He was almost teased about the siblings death and his favorite sport almost killed him. He will not go back to school even when he gets better. Stress is the real kicker. I am for what makes him happy and not about forcing him to go back. Although I tried because I was being told by family members it’s just wrong. He is well rounded but when murder that could have been totally avoided wasnt, I must think of him. He has been bribed, threatened, received the cold shoulder, his answer is no. I begged only. He saw death knocking 70 years too early at his sibling’s door and now he wants to stay home. He can get a diploma and he can socialize when he is feeling better. He is mature beyond his years. I will support him and will not smother him. I only have a hard time crying and not having him catch me. I think we take our children sometimes for granted. I must be careful to not go to the time thing. It will screw up my head for good. My son needs me more than ever or I would be with that sibling right now. God bless and don’t trust anyone. If your gut tells you to do something ignore the lazy mind and do it for God’s sake! It will save lives.
Sasha, I am so, so sorry. Thank you for sharing your experience so that we can all hold our children a little tighter and remember to trust that little voice when something feels off. May God bless you and give you strength. Sending you love and peace, dear one.
I was never a good mother of babies. I wished the crying for no apparent reason and middle of the night waking-up away as soon as possible. Now my kids are 6 and 12 and I enjoy them so much more. Looking back I don’t really miss it all that much, but I will miss the interesting conversations we have now where we talk about their young views on the world. They are so much more interesting now.
Kate in Ohio recently posted..The Case of the Missing Cupcake
Wow! As I sit here sobbing into my coffee thinking how to spend the Saturdays I have left! Thank you so much for the reminder because I have been saying “not now, maybe later” a lot lately since we are remodeling. Today when they ask to be pushed on the swings I am dropping everything!
Speechless and teary-eyed.
Love this article and your writing style. Cherish right now so you have no regrets later on. Relationships are more important than anything, especially with your children. Checking out your blog now!
Amy at Best Baby Strollers recently posted..Maclaren Techno XLR 2012 Updates
Thank you so much for sharing your struggles and insights. I know exactly how you feel. We can so easily get lost in the feeling of “missing out” on moments with our child just as much as we get lost in the struggles of every day moments with our child. I so agree that while realizing what we have lost (and will lose) is a great wake up call, it can ironically put us in a state of missing out on the current moments we don’t want to miss.
So happy to see you modelling the balancing between being aware of the struggles but staying awake to each moment….and cherishing them all whatever package they come in.
Thank you very much for sharing your struggles and insights. We can all use such a great reminder.
WAAHHHHHH! This had me teary eyed towards the end.. i had to get up and walk away because i’m at work and i don’t need the ‘what’s wrong??’ looks and questions.. i’ve been thinking a lot about it since i have a 6 month old and a 12 year old.. i keep wondering how my 12 year old became a little man/teenager overnight! i miss him being my little baby boy.. :-(. I know better with my 6 month old.. i keep telling my husband to enjoy her at this age because they grow soooo fast!
Oh I love this so much and that article hit me quite hard too. gulp. xo
tracy@sellabitmum recently posted..Confessions of a Scary Mommy Book Giveaway!
Great post! I have been thinking and wrote about exactly the same thing about a week ago (or a few days…the passage of time totally escapes me), PLUS that man has been stalking me on Twitter for a solid week now. SO, I am going to take all of this as a sign to read what he has to say (because maybe he’s not a hack after all). Thanks for ANOTHER reminder, as I lose perspective with three toddlers aged 2 and under more frequently than I care to admit. And I’m going to go Like you on Facebook, now, too. :-)
Stephanie recently posted..You Know You’re a Parent of Twins, Multiples, or Just a Bunch of Kids, When…
Beautifully written post! It makes me think about the time I have left with my little guys. They’re seven years old and soon, they’ll be driving away to college. Thank you for the wake up call.
Amanda recently posted..Logan the Story Teller
This is one of the most beautifully written—and personally touching—posts I have read in a long time. You are a truly gifted writer, each and every word sucked me in. My daughter will be 12 next week, and although I have never thought of my time with her in terms of number of Saturdays, I have had those moments of realization that it is all too fleeting. Your post spoke directly to me, and I thank you for the reminder. You have a new follower. Thanks!
a Book for My Daughter recently posted..Update: In Defense of My Children
I think this all the time… when we’ve had a rough day and all I’m waiting for is my 1 1/2 yr old to FINALLY go to sleep so that I can think for one single minute! And then he does fall asleep and I notice how big he’s gotten in the past 20 months and how quickly all that time went by. And if that time went by so quickly, the rest of it will fly by the same way. And I kiss him all over his head until he bats me away so that he can focus on dreaming. So we snuggle, because how much longer will he WANT to come to our bed and snuggle with his mum? Not forever, so obviously not long enough.
I’d like to cry in response to this post, but I’m at work. :(
Emma recently posted..he may call me "spider"
Thank God for Fridays and Sundays!
I get what you are saying. I almost couldn’t read most of the post because you reminded me that time is so limited with our children. Mine are 11 and 13 so most days they seem fine without me or dad. They rather do their own thing. But when we do have that special quality time they still light up. They still want to be with mom and dad! Relief! Just as long as nobody from school sees them, lol.
~Allie
Allie | Ramblings of a WAHM recently posted..Hootsuite for Twitter
Love it! I am grateful that my 12 year old daughter still wants to hold my hand walking through the parking lot (sometimes). I am grateful that my 14 year old son may not want as many hugs and kisses, but still cuddles with me on the couch when we watch American Idol. I am grateful that my 9 year old daughter is still young enough for lots of hugs and kisses. I am grateful for all the kid time we still have left!
Christina Rodriguez | The Diva’s Home recently posted..New Project for Diva by Design
I chuckled at the sad at the loss of Saturdays. I have only maybe 10 left with my son according to this author. But I know he will always be my son, so until one of departs from this earth, I have a ton of Saturdays left. Just because your children grow up, doesn’t make them your kids.
What a beautiful reminder to savor the moments rather than rant, bemoan and wish them away.
Andrea recently posted..Teaching Kids Philanthropy
Wow! This post moved me! I am weeping like a child! So often I do complain and forget that in a blink of an eye all of what I complain about, I will painstakingly miss. My daughter is almost nine as well. My son is in kinder. They are my life. Thank you for sharing this beautifully written article.
I needed this. In the biggest way possible. And now to figure out a way to have my husband read it as well. I am mother to an 8 year old and 4 year old. As much as I hated seeing the number of Saturdays, I’ll be sitting in the rain this week watching baseball and being glad for it, happy about it, rather than wishing I was doing something else. Thank you.
Thanks for the reminder to cherish these moments!
This article really struck a cord with me because it put into words what I’ve been feeling for my 3 years of motherhood. It’s always seemed like I can hear the clock ticking; counting down the days until my one and only leaves me behind. That is so depressing. I too take time at the end of the day to snuggle my son to sleep, and yes he sleeps with me. Some people call that bad parenting because my son doesn’t know how to fall asleep himself. I say if that’s the ONLY way that I screw him up I’m doing a fine job. We actually bought a king size bed the other day to replace the full size one that my “boys” and I no longer fit in comfortably. People look at me like I have 3 heads when I say this. Honestly, I dread the day when he no longer wants to snuggle with me.
OK, that should have come wiht a hankie alert!!! Thanks for the wake-up call.
Jennifer recently posted..Letter to a Younger Me
Thank you for all these amazing and wonderful comments about my post today! What an honor to publish on the Scary Mommy blog and to be received by all of you with such love and encouragement! Thank you for reading and for hopping over to “The Hands Free Revolution” on Facebook to join me on my journey to let go of distraction and grasp the moments that matter! You have all MADE MY DAY!
Hands Free Mama recently posted..How’s My Driving?
Beautiful post! Thank you for sharing your heart. You helped to change my perspective as well.
This is by far THE BEST blog post I have read in a very long time. And it’s times like this that I’m so glad I suck at math because I don’t even want to know how many Saturdays I have left. And now I’m pissed that I have to spend tomorrow at a darn baby shower.
Ali recently posted..WTF Wednesday – The "Good Self Esteem or Totally Delusional" Edition
Aaaaand, now I’m a mess. And I’m at work, so thanks for that ;) Loved the piece, and it’s all true. Now I’m off to check our your blog, just as soon as I re-plan our weekend. Less spring cleaning, more tickling.
Sarah recently posted..SO excited about my new Project
I have to say, I read this post while sitting in the Dr.’s office with my 18 year old daughter (who turns 19 tomorrow) and who is currently attendling college 3 hours from home. I immediately started crying. As she stared at me with a mortified look on her face, I told her-I’m not crying because I only have 240 Saturday’s left with your sister, I am crying because I don’t have any left with you and your brother! I immediately started sobbing as the Dr. walked who then proceeded to ask her about her all kinds of other embarrassing topics-as I sobbed.
As a Mom of a 22, 18 and 14 year old-thanks for the reminder to enjoy the time you have been given.
This is why I work part time now – which means delaying retirement down the road – because now is when I want the time,not when they are moved out. But with the general business of life, it is easy to miss the quality time moments. Recently though, I have been trying to tune in a lot more recently not from the finite number of Saturdays measured to when they leave home – but due to the recent press covering the abduction and murder of a child the same age as my own. While I mourn for the child I never met, I also feel obliged to realize how fortunate I am that I can keep having time with my own children. Tragedies show us how the things missed the most deeply are not necessarily the big moments, but the combination of all those little precious moments of time, moments that seem infinite until we find out that while time goes on, those moments actually do have an end; it highlightshow extraordinary the ordinary really is.
Okay I think I am officially broken! I have already past the car seat and the crumbs. I am into the changes of clothes school books and undergarments in the backseat. I stopped trying to keep the car clean and just try to be able to see carpet on the drivers side.
I am seeing the light at the end of the tunnel to “GET OUT”. I want my girls to grow up, become the AMAZING women I know they are, and have their own lives and experiences and stuff.
I want to watch all that too. I am amazed at them daily, and soak up all the hugs and “mommykins can I have” moments. Then one day I will get to meet my man friend again, he is that guy that has slept next to me for more than 10 years and will be closer to 15 when they leave. He is a pretty awesome fellow too, and I wanna soak up more time with him. He kind of gets put on hold while I soak up all the mommy moments.
Sweety Darlin recently posted..Why didn’t you share the cocaine?
I have a friend that constantly thinks this way. “only so many _ left til they are off at college”. I feel like she spends more time doating on the fact that it’s going to be over soon instead of just enjoying the time she has.
Yes, they grow up. Hopefully we have a good enough relationship that they still want to come around after they move out. If my family is any indication my kids will hopefully not move far away and we’ll have BBQ’s once a month with everyone.
AND I’ll have a craft room! WOOT can’t wait ;)
mom taxi julie recently posted..Banned From Book Club. Again.
I like the way you think! My kiddos are young, 5, almost 4, and 18 mos. I love them and really do cherish the time together, but hopefully they will become people who can stand on their own someday! I pray for them that they become wonderfully passionate, independent women who make a real difference in the world! I love watching it all unfold :) Oh and I’ll vote for a sewing room! hehe…
So beautiful! Thanks for another wonderful post, Rachel!
Karin recently posted..The Coming Adventures of a Soon-to-be Baldie
Thanks for this post! I’m sitting on the kitchen floor smiling at all the Cheerios now!
I gave up work last year to spend time with my daughter b4 she starts school next year. Having worked with pre-5 children for 20 years I thought “easy looking after just one”. But I found it hard. After reading ur blog, it made ne realise how precious my time is with het b4 she starts school and I slowly lose her. Thank you for reminding me how much I love her.
Thank you for your last lines in your article as they sum it up completely. I so agree that I too could complain less and live for the moment far more. Thank you for making me think!
Thank you for this post, everything about it struck a cord with me. From now on I am going to cherish every time I have left with them because I never realized that time is running out.
Shirley@motivatedmommyoftwo recently posted..Kids Nighttime Routine
Eloquent, profound and gut-wrenchingly true…oh how this post resonated with me. Thank you sincerely for the heart-felt and brutally honest kick in the ass reminder I needed to be present and savor my sweet girls while they’re still young enough to want me around. I’m too afraid to calculate how many Saturdays I’ve spent griping about how the dog just pooped out Polly Pockets shoes because they leave accessories all over the living room floor or complaining about how carelessly they let their Popsicles drip all over the front of the new dressed their Nana just bought them or how desperately I just want them to puh-leeze go to sleep and not beg for one more book or one more story so I can have an hour of uninterrupted grown-up time in front of the television. You are sooo right. It’s all finite and fleeting and I’m frightened of how much time I may have wasted already worrying about insignificant things. I can’t wait until tomorrow! This Saturday I am going to let them drip all over themselves, let the toys stay a scattered mess, and read as many books as they ask me too and I will relish in it all! Many, many thanks!
I’m counting myself lucky that we have so many kids and so many more Saturdays. It takes the sting out of having an almost 17 year old. I loved this SO much!
Very nicely written. You have to savor every moment. One of those annoying things my Mom always said about my brothers and I. “I put you on the kindergarden bus in the morning and you came home in the afternoon graduating high school’. I cannot tell you how true it is. My oldest is in college/living at home. I also have one in 10th grade and one in 4th. I am still in shock at how fast that high school graduation came. I’m so happy I savored the time I had with them. I used to cry thinking of them growing and and leaving too. Right now, they drive me nuts (my oldest’s boyfriend also lives with us *on the couch* so I’ve gained a teen). I’ve been telling my friends the teenage years are to get the parent ready for the child to move out. But with that said, I don’t know what I will do when they do.
I’m so happy I savored the moments we all had together as a family. The wonderful family vacations we had together, just the four of us. I know it helped shape the adults I’m having the pleasure of watching them become.
And chin up. Who says they will move out forever at 18? With the price of college and the size of the student loans some of our kids will graduate with……we may be able to add MANY Saturdays to that card.
(Just have to end with a giggle).
This is brilliant. A must read for all parents .
Mir recently posted..French Vintage Table 72"- Turned Legs
I can’t thank you enough for sharing this. After I stopped sobbing, fear crept in … I’ve wasted so many Saturdays running around getting “my stuff” done, wishing the hours away til bedtime when I’d get a break. After reading your beautiful post, I hope to slow down and be truly present for the little moments with my girls (3 & 8) tomorrow. Thank you!
Thanks for the marvelous posting! I certainly enjoyed reading it, you could be a great author.I will make sure to bookmark your blog and will eventually come back someday. I want to encourage that you continue your great writing, have a nice day!
Marisol recently posted..constipation home remedies
Thank you, Marisol, and EVERYONE who took the time to write such positive comments about my blog post! It is quite an amazing feeling to feel “understood” as a parent and affirmed as a writer all at once—which is what all of you have done with your messages here. I am truly grateful!
Hands Free Mama recently posted..A Window Opened
I needed that! Thank you so much! Headed to hug my precious 3 year old girl right now!
I had read/heard about the Saturday thing too. I wish I had had a similar reaction to it. I know I should be more appreciative of every Saturday that I have left but I need to get so much done on the weekends and sometimes its hard to slow down when its my only time to run errands, clean, etc and then get brief moments of me time. I need more Saturdays. Many more Saturdays. Or perhaps a clone of myself.
Marta recently posted..Content Discontent.
I LOVE this. For so many reasons. Like, because my children are growing up and because my husband has major health problems. Really great!
Just Jennifer recently posted..TGIF: The BIG Gratitude Edition
I have been feeling this way too. My son is turning 2 in two weeks, and I can’t believe how quickly time has gone. I know that people say this all the time, but now I can really see that “if you blink, you will miss it” saying is true.
Cassie recently posted..Renovation: Week Two
Fab post! I giggled while reading, and there’s still a lump in my throat.
My guys are 6.75 & 4.75 (they demand full credit for their aging) and I feel the poignancy of these fleeting moments of full-time Momming on a daily basis.
I work from home, so it’s so easy to just run upstairs to finish one last email, make one more call, but then I’ll tuck them in that evening & realize how little time we actually spent interacting or connecting that day. So I’ve been working on once they are home from school, disconnecting from my stuff & reconnecting with them. With just a minimum of effort and imagination even laundry or a trip the Trader Joe’s can be fun.
Thanks for shring. Thanks for reminding us to cherish the fleeting.
Lollie – The Fortuitous Housewife recently posted..Mega Millions: Are You Feelin’ Lucky?
I found this utterly depressing considering I am divorced, so I have to split the Saturday’s with my ex….so my teens have even less time with me….
Michelle Saunderson recently posted..Hunger Games Review
Oh, goodness…when you break it down like that, it puts a whole new spin on time and the important things in life.
And certainly helps prioritize on what is and isn’t important.
Great read.
Carrie recently posted..Boobs and hair ain’t the only things big in Texas.
Very good post. I know how you feel, my daughter left for college last fall and I wish I could go back.
Michelle recently posted..The Rules of Laundry
Yes!
Student Mom recently posted..Five Minute Friday – Gift
This is a beautiful post. Got me a little weepy. Every night I sweep under my baby’s high chair and it can sometimes feel like just another “chore” – thank you for remindeding me to put things into perspective. I waited years to be able to have such a daily chore to perform! And someday that sweet baby boy won’t need me to clean up after him. (Sigh.)
Sarah recently posted..Thoughts on time, space, and a purple dress
*reminding, I meant to write. Sorry…mommy brain! ;p
Sarah recently posted..Thoughts on time, space, and a purple dress
I am a clock watcher, and it’s hard for me to see the positive in his message or your message even though I know it is right there in front of my face. I’m a day counter, a count-downer, which is a downer. How many Saturdays do I have left? I think about it even more that I’m at work and she’s at daycare. Her first two years? Felt lengthy. Uninterrupted. Glorious and long and slow. Now? Time, it flies. And it scares me.
Christa the BabbyMama recently posted..P. and Her First Mamaless Outing
This makes me sad to think that one day my best friend will be all grown up . She is 5 now going on 20 . I was never close to my mom until after I had her and I believe that she was born so that I could be close to my mother . I get mad at my daughter when she gets out of control but then I realize that the things I get mad about I should not because the real problems don’t start until they are big enough to tell you they don’t need you anymore . I cherish every day that I do get to spend with her and this makes me cherish it even more
This post was exactly what I needed to see after yesterday. My two children tried to send me over the edge in the final hours of our day together. I greeted my husband with a “thank God you are home, I just opened the vodka.” last night. I even shed a few tears just thinking about the prospect of so few Saturdays being left to spend with my sweet babies, especially since I only work Saturdays and Sundays so that I can be home with them during the week. Thanks for the reality check :) I am adding your blog to my reading list.
Heidi Bryan recently posted..Mommies are actually superheros…
If you are divorced and there is a visitation order, cut the number of Saturdays in half.
Roxanne recently posted..I Turned Down A Dinner Date With An Ex-Con