Little girls may be made of sugar and spice and everything nice, but little girls with older brothers are also made of Tabasco sauce and a handful of habaneros. They pack some extra heat … and an occasional slingshot.
It’s easy to spot these sassy little sisters on the playground; usually wearing a typically girly pink or purple shirt, but sporting hand-me-down green dinosaur rain boots and glow-in-the-dark skeleton gloves.
Here are 18 more signs a little girl might have older brothers:
1. She starts battling with light sabers and swords the moment she can walk … and sometimes wins.
2. She tries to pee standing up when she first starts potty training.
3. She knows what to do with a Wii joy stick and, at barely two years old, can practically knock Glass Joe from Punch-Out!! on his ass.
4. She tries to puncture you with a toy screwdriver if you touch her Bob the Builder hardhat.
5. She falls down on the cement face first and gets up laughing.
6. She calls hot dogs wieners because for some reason it makes her brothers giggle.
7. She tries to feed her baby doll worms instead of a bottle.
8. She has the usual Madeleine, Fancy Nancy, Eloise, and Olivia books on her bookshelf. Right next to the well worn Thomas the Train, How I Became a Pirate, Driving my Tractor and Astro Boy books.
9. She knows how to build a fort that could keep ISIS out.
10. She doesn’t mind being used as a stand in for a football.
11. She gets mad and her immediate reaction is to go for the groin.
12. She responds to people who burp her name.
13. She keeps a cape and dagger with her princess dress up clothes.
14. She carries a matchbox car in her Dora the Explorer wallet.
15. She knows the quickest way to get her brother’s attention is to mess with his latest LEGO creation.
16. She can be found hanging out in her play kitchen shaking fake salt on an actual frog as she prepares to “fry” him up in her pan.
17. She uses the supplies from her toy doctor kit for real-life brother related emergencies. The fake Band-Aid has dried blood on it and the tweezers see about as much weekly wood action as the local titty bar down the street.
18. She uses her nail polish to paint the shells of snails and then cheers her brothers on as they race a small army of them Turbo style.
So, the next time you see a little girl marching around the neighborhood with some extra swagger in her step and a pull-up full of badass, it’s probably not because she’s up to anything naughty. More than likely she’s just experiencing an adrenaline rush after watching her brothers’ latest wrestling match.
Related post: Blurred (Gender) Lines