10 Reasons Age Three is More Terrible Than Two

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1. At two, they can barely talk. At three, they never shut the hell up.

2. At two, they cry. At three, they throw temper tantrums so epic, you become convinced that they are possessed by the devil.

3. At two, they’re happy to eat anything you present to them. At three, they eat only three foods (usually consisting of a starch and processed cheese).

4. At two, baths are a ten-minute event, the result of which is a clean child. At three, baths take over an hour, and result in a drenched bathroom, sopping wet mommy, and 16 used towels.

5. At two, they wear diapers that can be changed on your watch. At three, they’re potty trained and the world revolves around their bladders and bowels.

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6. At two, they are distracted by a box of Gerber Puffs at the grocery store. At three, they want to dictate your entire food list.

7. At two, they let you dress them, looking innocent and adorable. At three, they insist on picking out their clothes, looking like pint sized versions of mental institution inhabitants.

8. At two, they don’t like to get dirty. At three, they thrive on it.

9. At two, you can do things for them, saving infinite amounts of time. At three, they must do everything by themselves, taking FOR-fucking-EVER.

10. At two, manipulation is the last thing on their minds. At three, they own you. And they know it.

Related post: 20 Reasons My Two Year Old Had a Hard Day

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@scarymommy

What started as an innocent on-line baby book to chronicle Jill Smokler’s stay-at-home days with her children, quickly transformed into a vibrant community of parents, brought together by a common theme: Parenting doesn’t have to be perfect. Welcome to Scary Mommy!

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Kristin Walsh 2 months ago

I’m laughing out loud and it feels soooo good!!!! It feels so frickin good to validate my life by reading this blog…. I pull my hair out EVERY DAY and walk around like a zombie…. I know their is light at the end of the 55,000 mile tunnel. They are such assholes.

TheBeardenPack 3 months ago

So true in so many ways. I thought terrible two’s were bad. I’d take that over the terrible three’s.

Kim 7 months ago

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Ice Age Avalanche hack 11 months ago

Otherwise it’s likely to take us an excessive amount of hours to improve our car.

Amanda 12 months ago

Waiting till you hit the f*cking fours!! 3 is a cake walk compared to 4. You are welcome for the warning.

rebecca woodin 12 months ago

Best article on this issue out there. I literally LOLd every point. Now to find one on 4s here… lol

Living Room Lessons 1 year ago

Looking for something to do with these crazy 3 year olds?! Check out http://www.livingroomlessons.com for fun and educational, at-home activities for preschoolers.

irene marshall 1 year ago

I am a gigi of a 3yr old girl and take care of her for my daughter 7 days a week. She is an angle with me but is Evil with her mother. I dont understand why this is??? My daughter can scream at the top of her lungs at her and refuses to listen. Any advice both driving me crazy. I feel like im raising 2 3 yr olds!!!!

    rebecca woodin 12 months ago

    I have a 3 year old like this. My mom thought i was exaggerating at first lol. Nope shes satanic for me!

DC 1 year ago

i teach 3 year year-olds, and if they have parents who talk about them that way, calling them “pricks,” it is no wonder they behave that way. Study your child development and interact with them effectively, and you will not have these problems! I have 3 kids and all were an absolute joy at these ages. If you can’t handle these early years, good luck with the teen years, and see what calling your kid a “prick” then will bring you!

Kimberly Shelton 1 year ago

Thank God what I have been thinking about seeking pediatric psychotic care for my 3 yr old is actually normal for his age. Lol

Paulette 1 year ago

My son is 18 months and already trying to do things a 3 year old does so I am not looking forward to him turning 2 or 3

join 1 year ago

its the Terrible Two’s and the Bring You To Your Knees Threes!

JoAnn DePalma 1 year ago

3s are worst than 2s amen

yusra domingo 1 year ago

Its so Damn true you think you over the 2’s but then the 3’s are so much more dramatic and OMW its hectic.

Chris Russell 1 year ago

I always said that..raised 5…

Madison Hedge 1 year ago

Shut up

I’ve got q two year old

Just hush

Sheila Raymond 1 year ago

Oh how very true.

Latoya Jones 1 year ago

I have 4 in one on the way

Sue Simon 1 year ago

That was true for us!

Abigail Camacho 1 year ago

Lol!! You can only hope she’s ahead of the curve and not practicing for when she’s 3.

Marie Sanders 1 year ago

ha ha, that’s cute… now try a 14 year old… 😛

Rebecca Mecham Bagley 1 year ago

I LOVED 3 with my kids! LOVED it!!! It was my favorite age. Though, I loved 2 as well…either I’m really lucky or just crazy…LOL!

Steve Martinson 1 year ago

They learn to lie at 3.

Heidi Adams 1 year ago

I mostly enjoyed the 2s and 3s. Now, 13s I am not enjoying so much. Why does everything have to be an argument? Didn’t we settle that when he was 3?

Melanie Dh 1 year ago

Might want to consider how folks struggling with mental illness might feel about #7.

Geraldine Petrak 1 year ago

Depends on the child.

Alli Roberts 1 year ago

SO SO TRUE!

Ola Manning 1 year ago

What?!? I asked when my son turned 3, “terrible 2 is history, what’s next?” 😀 I believe 3 is more terrible than 2 😀

Holly Speach 1 year ago

Ok maybe this sounds bad, but every time I see this posted, I think how creepy that little boy looks. It’s like he’s right out of a scary movie!

Mickey Gerber 1 year ago

I’ve always said the terrible twos means it lasts two years. Such funny and true posts!

Julie Owen 1 year ago

The terrible two’s means when it starts, it lasts for two years. Not necessarily at age two.

Sandy Dozier Lillard Adams 1 year ago

Wait until they are four; they will begin trying to control and manipulate you.

Jessica Ploch 1 year ago

Age 3 stinks

Lisa Creson 1 year ago

My boy was an angel at 2. I thought ‘terrible twos are such BS’. Then he turned 3, and all hell broke loose.

(He’s 4.5 now, and I would say 3 was the worst of it).

Elaine Armitage 1 year ago

Oh help!!! :-0

Candice Wilson StOnge 1 year ago

Yes!!!!!!

Teresa Bradfield-Anker 1 year ago

Sooo true!

Donna Quinton 1 year ago

No one tells you the “terrible twos” lasts two years! Between 4 and 5 you can start reasoning with them. It does get easier after this…

Margaret Rodgers Barthe 1 year ago

And you need to remember every moment….because too soon they will be “grown up” and you will wish for two or three or four again!

Amanda Reszkowski 1 year ago

This could not be more true.

Mandy Engelbrecht 1 year ago

two was great, three was a nightmare & 4 not much better – now he’s nearly 18 & somehow we both survived & love each other still

Jenn Dixon 1 year ago

My mom babysat for years and used to say it was terrible two, but god-awful three.

Erin Block 1 year ago

I. Am. Terrified!!! Lol, After reading some of these comments I’m thinking I’d like to run away (or slip into a coma) until Miss 2.5 is well clear of 3!! She has been ‘challenging’ for about a year now….god help me!

Tsitsi Chiwashira 1 year ago

I feel so much better after reading the comments….lol

Tracey Bailey 1 year ago

Haha Yep! I’ve inly referred to my little guy as the spawn of satan once though. He’s sweet enough to make up for it (most of the time)!

Adrienne Doyle 1 year ago

Lmao at #9… Soooo true!!! It’s all true! LOVE my babies though

Bec Evans 1 year ago

I have twin 8yr olds, in my opinion I would take an army of 2 and 3yr olds any day over the dramatics and attitudes of 8yr olds

Priscilla Girardot 1 year ago

I think I might be one of the few who feels like things have gotten a million times easier since birth. Aiden was a colic baby and the most stubborn child I have ever met. Not kidding. He’s such a sweet angel and would flip into needing an exorcism in 2.5 seconds. It was crazy. Once he hit three he completely changed. I also think my parenting changed as well. He was my first and I’m naturally a passive person. I learned the hard way, be stern and consistent or prepare yourself for the worst of all. Now he is four and approaching five soon and I can honestly say life with him is 100% easier. He listens to me (most of the time) and actually enjoys being a good helper & listener. Thank you to the heavens above! Haha. We had another after Aiden with hopes we’d get the exact opposite and we did! Hallelujah! Vanden is a walk in the park compared to his brother. Aiden definitely prepared us and now we can handle anything. I had my tubes tied after Vanden and I do not regret it, lol. Two boys is more than enough for us! Wishing you all luck

Jennifer Piedra 1 year ago

Every.single.one.

Kylie Wright 1 year ago

Soooooo true!!!!!

Traci Brignoni 1 year ago

Yep

Francesca Lao 1 year ago

OMG this is scary…..lol

Lindsey Aylward 1 year ago

I find four to be much worse than three.

June 1 year ago

I think it depends on your perspective & expectations. I didn’t read all the comments, though one or two I did horrified me!
My mother, (who would now be 84) a former elementary school teacher always said 3 year olds were delightful as they are so curious about their world & hungry to learn.
I think we need to change our thinking around children sometimes, they are children, with growing minds, not mini adults plotting to make our lives difficult. I am sure my mother found every age interesting as that was the way she thought, her expectations were positive.
I don’t get why some people have children & are then in such a hurry for them to grow up, can’t we enjoy them at every age?

Lisa Giles 1 year ago

Anyone who says the terrible twos are the worst, obviously gave away their kid before they hit 3.

Nova Kane 1 year ago

I’ve always said this.

Luci Johnson Craig Grubbs 1 year ago

Spot on! My youngest is turning 4 soon and I am hoping he will more relaxed!

Autumn Huddleston Murray 1 year ago

Yes!! 3 is my least favorite age and my youngest is fast approaching the tyrannical 3 phase!! Every little thing sets off a huge fit of rage.

Nymarie Ramos-Gonzalez 1 year ago

I only remember my oldest going through this age. It started at 18 mos. (he would bash his head against the tile floor in the kitchen!) but I swear the day he turned 3, it was over.

Natalie Hendrix 1 year ago

Lord help me now.

Aleccia Lin Shaffer 1 year ago

A friend of mine has written a book about this very subject called “Three Year Olds are A**holes”.

Her name is Sarah Fader, for any interested in keeping her upcoming word on their “to read” list. 😀

Lynn Butler 1 year ago

When my son was two he was an ANGEL, I could not believe how good he was…then he turned three….

Rachel Wickern Packard 1 year ago

My dad always says, “those who say terrible twos, hasn’t had a three year old.”

Krys Hackett-Soss 1 year ago

Agreed – it’s a rough age for sure!

Rebecca Louise Herbunot 1 year ago

Not one age is worse than the others. Every age comes with its own set of challenges and frustration. Stop trying to compare

Missy Gibson Hightower 1 year ago

I always said terrible twos but terrifying threes lol

Melissa Myers Arklind 1 year ago

He hasn’t had those baby puffs in a long time. I forgot all about those, he use to love them. ☺️

Melissa Myers Arklind 1 year ago
Sherri Broeking 1 year ago

Amen, sister!! All three of mine were worse at age 3.

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