Jill Smokler, AKA Scary Mommy
@scarymommy
Latest posts by Jill Smokler, AKA Scary Mommy (see all)
- The Disney Reveal - May 14, 2013
- Met My Match At Disney… - May 13, 2013
- Sunday’s Baltimore Sun - May 11, 2013
Last week, it dawned on me that it had been exactly nine months since I signed my book deal. Nine months of stress and excitement and worry and exuberance and everything in between. It seemed perfectly fitting that the gestation period so closely echoed my pregnancies, since the book really has become my fourth child. But, the timing is the very least of it. Everything about coming out with this book has been like having a baby…
1. It’s nothing like I expected. I imagined pregnancy and childbirth to be this miraculous event where I would suddenly just feel like an earth goddess and be encompassed in pure maternal love and joy. Just like I envisioned myself suddenly all intellectual and shit once I became a published author. Hardly the case with either. I hated every minute of pregnancy and got scolded at a reading for swearing too much. Nothing changes.
2. I’m obsessed. I must have sent out ten e-mails a week when Lily was a newborn with pictures and updates, driving everyone in my life crazy. She was all I could talk about, write about and think about… Sound familiar? Remember when I used to write about something other than the book?!
3. People tell me more than I care to know. Take for example, this email I received from a man I don’t know in Utah: ”I am so sorry to do this, I promise, but since I’m a guy I’m going to “go there,” that purple seemingly “leather” dress? outfit? is not something that you want to wear on TV with the orange sweater over it, it doesn’t fit and it reflects the TV lights. Don’t forget what TV does….” Um, did I ask? I didn’t ask people what they thought of my baby names or the fact that I formula fed and I certainly don’t recall asking people what they thought of my dress.
4. I use the baby as an excuse. You know that haze you walk around in when you have an infant and everyone just understands because you have a new baby at home? I’m in that delirious phase again, except my baby doesn’t spit up or need diaper changes.
5. The lows, are LOW. Like the Concord, New Hampshire, book signing/reading, where ONE person showed up. I think a good rule of thumb is that you should never have fewer people at your book signing than the number of people who watched your bruised vagina push out a newborn. Sitting at an entry table accosting innocent strangers to buy your book is even lower than having a meltdown when the mailman asks when you’re due as the two month old baby sits in the next room. Not so much fun.
6. The highs are high. The sleepless nights, crying fits and utter frustration suck, but then you have that moment of peacefully holding your sweet baby and they all wash away. The last few months have been some of the most stressful of my life. That NH reading kicked my ass, but the two readings following in Warwick, RI and Burlington, MA were so much fun and more than made up for it.
7. The “it” moment. For me, it was the moment each of my kids flashed me that first smile. Nothing but pure and utter joy. With this baby, it was finding out that I hit next week’s New York Times Best Seller’s list late last night. I can officially say I have a NYT bestselling book. Holy shit!!!!!
And, thank you. I could never have done this without your support! (If you haven’t yet held my newborn, she’s adorable. And available for purchase at any bookstore.)
{ 74 comments… read them below or add one }
Congrats on the NYT Bestseller list and hitting 15 on Amazon! Can’t wait to see you in Naperville!
Kristin C recently posted..Helen’s smile
Congratulations!! Now go do another happy dance!
Jessica recently posted..Untitled
Squeeeee…. I guess that’s how you spell it… lol… YAY… Congratulations ~so very awesome!
Amy recently posted..Busted
WOW!!!! so excited for you, I love the book!!!! And this was exactly YOU…warm, honest and looks great in PURPLE ;)
xoxo
Kir recently posted..Proud Mommy Moments: Heather of Theta Mom is Bringing Community to the Corner
Amazing!!! Screw that man talking your outfit..you looked fabulous. he’s just jealous..as I am jealous of that one person that showed up at your Concord signing! wish that would’ve been me!
I know…I would LOVE LOVE LOVE to be the one person who had you all to myself for an hour!!!
I know one person wasn’t ideal for the signing but…hopefully it makes you feel better knowing that there are literally THOUSANDS of us who would love to have time alone with you:)
Yes, as the lone fan in Concord NH, I can attest that I was delighted to have some one-on-one time with Jill! (Though, of course, sad that she had invested all that time getting there for just little ol’ me…thrilled to hear that the subsequent signings have been well-attended and, of course, about the NYT best-seller status!)
Jen @ Mommy Tries recently posted..Crazy Baby Wednesday: 4/11/12
Way to go, Jill! It was a pleasure meeting you in Burlington last night, and don’t let the Concord thing get you down. I’m from NH and I NEVER go to Concord unless I’m forced to to do business for some reason. Loving the book… The part about women who go their entire pregnancy without knowing they’re pregnant… I feel the SAME WAY. :)
Congrats!! *passes cigar* if we smoked them, we would smoke one in your honor! What an amazing accomplishment! -The LoveFeast Gals
LoveFeast Table recently posted..Espresso Maple Short Rib Recipe
CONGRATS Jill – that is wonderful and I am sooooo happy for you!
lynn @ Maven of Savin’ recently posted..Franklin Fold-n-Go Shooters $19.99 shipped
OMG, NYT bestseller list!!! And #15 on Amazon? You just knocked out a giant portion of most people’s bucket lists right there!
Finished the book the other day and loved it. It felt, scarily enough, like you were in my head.
Angie Kinghorn recently posted..Mary’s son
I bet your book baby is beautiful and funny! I can’t wait to hold her. I hope she doesn’t puke down my blouse…
RachRiot recently posted..¡Eye Caramba!
I just finished reading mine and my kids kept asking me why I was laughing so hard. I couldn’t tell them as they are 6 and 12, and, you know, they are boys.
Congratulations and continued success!
Kate in Ohio recently posted..Not the Easter Miracle We Hoped For
As you know, I don’t even have kids but still love your stuff and can completely relate to the book love (minus the actual book deal, but whatever.) The good thing is that the book stays nice and small forever and ever. With kids? You’re on your own…but they might just help inspire a sequel ;)
Abby recently posted..Be You. Someone Might Like It
So sorry to hear about NH. If it helps I also live in VT and can tell you with all certainty – New Englanders are weird. No not people from Boston or Hartford but REAL New Englanders. These people like they’re syrup with bits of bark in it. You are “new in town” if you can’t trace your roots to the Mayflower. They think science is just a bunch of people trying to figure out new ways to sell you stuff. So really – having fewer people come is really a bonus.
Yay for your fourth child! And like having children, having just pushed one out, people will ask, “WHEN’S THE NEXT ONE??”
Congrats on the NYT bestselling list!
Alison@Mama Wants This recently posted..The Quilt
So exciting! Can’t wait to have my book signed on Monday…
Kate Coveny Hood recently posted..Personal History (We Move to Pelham)
Does the lovely Ms. Smokler not realize the magnitude of making the NYT Best Seller list in the company of “The Book?” (Or all three of them as the case may be!) Freaking awesome!
I actually just gifted your book as part of a baby shower gift yesterday. So happy for you! :)
Adryon recently posted..Don’t Blink
Congratulations Jill! Those of us who love you just knew that your book would be awesome. It is so fun to be on this journey with you and to share in your success :) Wishing you nothing but the best!
Congrats again on making the NYT bestseller list! You’re fabulous and deserve every minute of this awesome ride you’re on. It was SO fun meeting you last night in Burlington! I’m a bigger fan now than I was before meeting you.
Also? You looked amazing last night and on The Today Show. That guy from Utah is a loser if he needed to take time to email a stranger about her outfit. Clearly he hasn’t been laid in a while. HA!
Eve recently posted..Caine’s Arcade
–>Can you blame any lingering weight gain on writing a book too? If so, I’m writing SEVERAL.
WebSavvyMom recently posted..Wordless Wednesday – Big Brother Flashbacks
Wow. Just, wow.
That’s fantabulous Jill!
Way to show NYT’s Best Seller list who’s boss!
Hooray for the Book Baby! And I hope that you are also exempt from cooking dinner and cleaning the house b/c you’re a new mom.
Jennifer recently posted..Wordless Wednesday: I Posted a Post that John Taylor Posted…Does That Mean We Cyber-Touched?
You should have a huge turn out in Naperville! I cannot wait!
megryansmom recently posted..Great Easter Gifts from Fannie May – SUPER Quick Chocolate Giveaway
Awesome! Way to go!
And by the way, I thought you rocked that purple dress!
Liz @ PeaceLoveGuac recently posted..Sibling Revelry
Congrats, Jill! I promise you’ll get to sleep through the night eventually!
Susan @ Mommy Mind Trip recently posted..The Two-Year-Old Teacher
It’s because you friggin’ rock!
http://www.oatestosow.blogspot.com
Congratulations!
I’m still waiting for my copy, the evil Amazon people are holding it back. Or maybe it is the UPS people. I don’t care, whoever is holding it back is evil…
Tinne from Tantrums and Tomatoes recently posted..Of Instagram,death turtles and how to behave at an antique market
Congrats on your book. I still need to get a copy. I am excited to read it.
Seriously Sassy Mama recently posted..I Am An Ax Wo-Man Hear Me Roar!
Wow! I am in awe of you, seriously in awe! You are a total fucking ROCK STAR!! (yeah, I dropped the f-bomb, just for you and those tight asses who reprimanded you!) While I haven’t finished your book (I blame the kids… the 14 month old twins in particular!), I already know it totally belongs on EVERY bestsellers list there is! Congrats on the NYT and Amazon lists! You are my hero, Jill! Now, if I could just get you to come to our dinky ass town here in southwestern VA…. I would bring a MOB to come see you!!! <3
I’m SO proud of you, Jill! You deserve this, every bit of it! -
Jackie Hennessey recently posted..You’re still a good mother if…
Yay! Congrats! Now come to the Michigan…
Katy @ Experienced Bad Mom recently posted..Names I Would Never Give My Children
Us New Englanders are weird :( I wanted to come to the book signing, I only live an hour north, but I had to work :( I would have loved to meet you. I’m sorry us New Hampshireites are jackasses.
Congrats on everything else though! And it’s rather sad that a GUY reprimanded your choice of wardrobe….lol Most men I know can’t match socks let alone colors.
screw him.
you look fabulous
want me to send my cousin vinny over to visit him?
and of course you’re on the NYT list; you know how to write, period.
vanillasugarblog recently posted..raspberry-white chocolate filled chocolate thumbprints
Congrats, Jill! So glad the hard work is paying off! I wondered about the NH date….just didn’t seem like the best match…
I’m just so excited for you!
xo
Practical Parenting recently posted..The Snowball Effect
You go girl! This is an amazing achievement.
Remember those lows usually cycle back into highs! NH experience be-gone!
Cathy (RImombloggers)
Why do Utahns insist on making us all look like morons? That man from Utah was out of his mind, your dress looked amazing. Sometimes people from Utah do such dumb stuff and make me embarrassed to be from this state.
Anyway! Congratulations, I am so happy for you! Also, can’t wait to join you on that list. ;)
Aubrey Anne recently posted..Seven years
Oh, I forgot to mention how disturbing and fantastic the image at the top of this blog post is. ha ha ha
Aubrey Anne recently posted..Seven years
Does that make me your Lamaze coach? :)
Congratulations! The book is fantastic, as are you.
Many congrats to you!!
MusingsfromMe/Jill recently posted..What’s on TV Tonight?
Oh wow, that is great. Congrats!
Carolyn recently posted..15 Fabulous (and Free) WordPress Plugins
Congratulations!! All the stress, frustration, craziness and hard work ARE paying off. You should be feeling ridiculously happy with yourself :)
Tracy recently posted..Morning Asshattery
Jill, congrats on hitting the bestsellers list! That’s so cool!!!
Lynn from For Love or Funny recently posted..My hairy pink tree
Oh wow! I’m crying right now!
Ready for a fifth child already? You must be in that newborn euphoria stage… ;-P I’m so glad your signings are going well. I SO wish I could magically beam myself up and be at one of them… xo
Elaine recently posted..The Egg Scramble
Woohoo! Total awesomeness!
And with this news, who cares what you wore on TV (which btw was a fab color for you!) you are on the NYT BEST SELLER list! :)
xo
Kelly recently posted..Needing Downtime
Congrats on this baby. Thank you for taking us on your launch journey.
Danielle C recently posted..Imprints: the Responsibility of Creating Memories for our Kids
On behalf of those Northern New Englanders who love you, apologies for the lack of support in NH. You should have come to Portland, ME instead. :)
Jill,
If I ever hear/read that your book puked/pooped or spit up on you I am going to have to call Jeff and tell him that it is time to take you away for a bit. ;)
Mazel Tov on all your success, it is very cool. When is the sequel coming out? ;)
Jack@TheJackB recently posted..Sex, Lies & Blogging- The Post That Went Viral
I really can’t say enough how happy for you and proud of you I am, Jill.
Arnebya recently posted..Wordful Wednesday: Every Year, Y’all
woohoo! I love it – so many parallels indeed. And am totally buying the book tomorrow for my Kindle ;-)
Michele C. recently posted..IT’S MY BIRTHDAY!!!!!!!
Congratulations!! I have started to read your book and I LOVE IT!!. Thinking of buying another one for my cousin who is due next month and could use a book like yours to help her get out of the fantasy bubble she is in right now. LOL!!!! She needs to read about the reality of motherhood.
Thank you for the book and I love your blog
Shirley@motivatedmommyoftwo recently posted..Crockpot Turkey Meat Lasagna
For the record… I thought you looked amazing on the Today Show. :-)
Jen recently posted..Hello, My Name Is…
Congrats on the NYT list and 15 on Amazon! Woohoo!
Alissa recently posted..Failure Is An Option
I’m sorry, but what part of SCARY mommy doesn’t some fool man understand? it’s not like your site is cutesymommywhowantseveryonesopinionsaboutherlife.com You looked hawt. Rawr.
Rebeccah recently posted..Rollin’ Down The A1A. (I’m Resisting The Urge To Sing "Ice, Ice Baby")
This is me giving you the side eye! ;-)
What did I tell you? It is THAT awesome. And so are you. Worthy of all of the praise you’re getting (and what guy will take the time to email you about stupid shit like that?). I feel like I’ve just gotten on the NYT’s list (minus the cash! ;-).
I can’t wait to see you in Orlando. And don’t worry, even if it’s just me, I’ll make enough noise for at least 10! ;-)
oxoxox
Sili recently posted..Wild About Books
That’s amazing news! Congratulations. And I love your analogy!
Pauline recently posted..Common-Courtesy Rules
Congratulations :) And thanks for this hilarious comparison!
CC Jen recently posted..Exciting!
Jill: I bought seven copies and handed them out to my favorite mommies. They’ve since handed them out to some of theirs. The best part is we never have time to sit and read and when we do, someone starts crying or something…. and this is a quick read! Like giggling, crying shrieking good fast quick awesome read. So it’s not intimidating! :) Congrats on the NYT bestseller list and the Amazon top 50 list! It’s the book that keeps on giving!
Way to go, you! I’m so, so excited for you!!
Galit Breen recently posted..First Day, Last Day
Holy crap, that sounds like my blogging life lately.
#2 I drive my friends and family nuts with blog post updates and VINTAGE posts I tweet and the Christian homeschooling espionage post I wrote was like pushing a baby out of my head but it was therapeutic.
#3 People think they can get on my blog and critique my parenting. Just for fun, I let them.
You are handling everything wonderfully …. it’s a huge thing and you are amazing!
Kerrie McLoughlin recently posted..Your Butt is Grass and I’m Gonna Mow It
Awesome Jill!!
Rockin’ the book tour, rockin’ the best sellers lists…you go, girl!!!
Lollie – The Fortuitous Housewife recently posted..Very Scary, Very Fun
It is like everything in life that means something.
Nothing comes for free!
Love the humor and mischievious glint in your eye in which you seem to view the world!
This is too funny! You reached your goal because you are amazing and comparing writing a book to pushing out a baby was magical. Congrats on all the great things coming your way!
Cassie recently posted..Papa’s Pizza Parlor
I would have come to your Concord NH signing, but we live 1.5 hours north and have a newborn… so sorry more didn’t show up, they should have!!
This is so, so awesome, Jill! Thrilled for you xo
Marinka recently posted..I Don’t Have a Camera (And Other Updates from This Week)
Freaken Fantastic!!! You will be number one in just a few months!!! I can feel it Jill!!! So glad the signing in RI helped pick you up from the NH one. =) I had so much fun that night as well. Great to meet you!!! Still reading……..
Kristin Wheeler (MamaLuvsBooks) recently posted..$200 Rainy Day Facebook Frenzy!!!
Well done. I’ve wanted to be a writer since I was 8 years old. Well, if you define “being a writer” by being published. Which I have since I was 8. However, I had my first book published in 2004, and to my surprise it was much more heartbreaking than anything else. It was nothing like I had always expected or imagined. Maybe if I had ended up the the NYT it would have helped:)
“The child psychologist who thought she had all the answers to parenting until she became one herself.” http://www.themommypsychologist.com
The Mommy Psychologist recently posted..It’s Daddy’s Turn
Great.
Congrats on such a major accomplishment!
So very true. I’m not there yet, but I have said similar about writing my books and editing with my agent and possible publishers. One day, I will make it all the way to the actual birthing. ;)
Heather recently posted..Judging Young Albus