Yes, You Should Have a Third Child

156 Comments

I’ve run a few posts lately on the difficulties of having three children and the merits of having just two. I’m certainly not on a mission to prevent third children, but can see how the posts would be interpreted that way. Last week, a reader commented that she thought she wanted three kids, but was having second thoughts thanks to my postings, which was never my intent at all. So, for the record: I love having three children and truly can’t imagine my life any other way. If you are on the fence about if you should have a third child or not, I most definitely recommend expanding your family. Your days will no doubt be more hectic, more challenging and more overwhelming, but they will also be filled with more wonder and more love than ever before. How could you not want that?

Here are ten (out of a gazillion) reasons I love my third child…

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1. He doesn’t just kiss you; he grabs your face with both hands and KISSES YOUR FACE OFF. He does’t just hug you; he envelopes you completely. Everyone he loves, he loves fiercely.

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2. He brings out the silliness in everyone around him. It’s just impossible not to laugh around Evan.

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3. He dives into everything he does one hundred and ten percent (often without looking and always causing me near heart attacks, but still.)

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4. He completely worships his big brother and big sister.

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5. He will find his way into your arms and make himself completely at home there.

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6. He is happy just to come along for the ride, his expectations pathetically low.

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7. He’s got a style all his own, and he rocks it.

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8. He is pure and utter sweetness, even when he is up to no good.

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9. He made our family complete, despite it never feeling incomplete before.

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10. He will always be my baby, long after he isn’t a baby anymore. I know so, because he promised me. And I’m holding him to it.

Comments

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  1. 1

    Kat says

    It’s funny, the picture that you posted to #8 (pure and utter sweetness) looks like he’s planning something not entirely sweet, lol!

    My 14 yr old boy who is 5’10”, all arms, legs and manly hairiness absolutely breaks my heart with his grown up body and attitude but shows me in so many ways that he is still my boy (makes his dad jealous). Trust me, he’ll keep his promise.

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  2. 5

    Molly says

    My third was not planned and the pregnancy surprised us at the worst time possible. I was upset about just being pregnant for months! The turning point came seeing my husband’s face when he found out that after 2 girls (and 2 much older stepdaughters) we were having a boy. He had always embraced being a dad to girls, but the moment he found out he was no longer alone in a sea of estrogen made everything worthwhile. Today, 4.5 years (and a vasectomy)later I can’t imagine what our life would be like without our baby boy!

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  3. 6

    amber says

    I am really sad I can not have more. My adorable son is just so amazing. I always thought we would have more. 31 and I had a stroke that made it too risky to have more. Enjoy those kiddos. Kids their faces and enjoy the bickering. My son really wants a little brother or sister. =(

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  4. 8

    Grown and Flown says

    Third child was the best decision I ever made. Two children, one relationship. Three children, three relationships. One mom’s opinion, it made my family life so much richer. And even though my third is 17, other than some of the kissing and lap sitting, not one of the other things on your list has changed!

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  5. 11

    Heather says

    2 kids. A boy and a girl. That’s what I wanted. 2 boys or 2 girls would have been just fine too but the magic number was 2. When I met my husband, he was on the same page…he’d only ever wanted 2. Had my girl first. 3 years later after lots of trying, got pregnant but lost the baby. Didn’t know if I wanted to try again but in the end we did and a year later, our son came along. Voila! There was my dream family. A year later, Surprise! I was pregnant with our third child. Wasn’t expected or planned but I couldn’t imagine our family without her in it…it would be too quiet :)

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  6. 13

    Michelle says

    I love this. I just had my third baby. He was planned, but I definitely doubted our decision the entire pregnancy. Most people agreed that I was crazy. While I haven’t had the chance to experience all of these yet, I definitely agree with #10. Oh, and mine is an Evan too :)

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  7. 14

    Cass says

    I didn’t ever want a third child. During the delivery of my first son, I lost half my blood mass. I remember seeing him in the Doctor’s arms, begging my husband to go with the baby so he wouldn’t see me die, and then nothing until hours later waking up with tubes everywhere and terrible pain. My husband said I was clinically dead for four minutes. They had to shock me and replace insane amounts of blood. After that I was told that having another child would kill me, my heart and body couldn’t take it. But thanks to some antibiotics mixed with the pill, I became pregnant again, and had a c-section for my second son. This time, we both almost died. He was a full term baby with a totally undeveloped heart/lung system, and ended up having to fight to survive from minute one. He turned six last month and has recently had his first heart attack. When I found out he was going to be a boy, I was devastated, I wanted, needed, a girl. I will never forgive myself for my attitude about his sex. Who cares?? I just want him to LIVE. At some point, yet again birth control failed and I became pregnant with a third. It was a shock. During an exam it was discovered I had cervical cancer. I was told that an abortion was needed to save my life so I could have treatment. I said no. I waited and had a full time baby girl. I needed immediate surgery following the c-section to remove the cancer. A year later we found out the cancer had come back and spread and at 31 I had a complete hysterectomy to remove it. If I hadn’t had a third child, having an exam when I did, we never would have caught it in time. The THREE children I have keep me fighting. I was diagnosed last month with MS. If I didn’t have these three children looking to me for everything from tying a shoe to kissing booboos. They trust me. I know they need me, but the real secret is, I need THEM, more then they need me. They anchor me, they motivate me, and when I stumble, they drag me. They don’t even know they do it, but the three of them, two wouldn’t be enough. They’re my team, my cheering section, my soul.

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  8. 30

    Stephanie says

    Ahem, well, I think I am going to wait a few years before I do this. My daughter was the last one out, and, uh, yeah. I’ll just wait a bit on this…;-)

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  9. 32

    Maria Santoro says

    My third was a surprise 11 short months after number 2. I was worried about having two that little at the same time being disabled but I can't imagine my family without her. She made me realize my number 2 was born to be a big sister and after 6 losses I'm glad we could provide that lil sis for her. Love my brood.

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