Her post comes three years after her mother and grandmother died over the holidays in 2016
Billie Lourd lost her mom, Carrie Fisher, and her grandma, Debbie Reynolds, simultaneously three years ago over the holidays. She definitely understands better than most the mixture of emotions — both highs and lows — that can hit home this time of year. Her heartfelt message on Instagram is meant for anyone grieving the loss of someone they love through the holiday season.
The actress shared a childhood photo of herself with both her grandma and mom on her Instagram page, and her words will resonate with anyone who’s suffered a loss.
“Happy holidays! (But also sad/emotional/weird/stressful holidays!),” she writes. “Sending my love to everyone who has lost someone they loved and is missing them a little extra today. I see you. It’s okay if everything ain’t all merry and bright. It can be a mix of all of it. And it’s all okay.”
Sure, Christmas is a wonderful time of year and full of joy and love. You can feel all of those things and still be sad about the absence of loved ones, too. The holidays can bring out the best and worst (and everything in between) when it comes to our emotional spectrum.
Carrie Fisher and Debbie Reynolds were both so internationally beloved, and it’s profound to hear from Lourd as she navigates through her own grief — especially this time of year. “Eat something delish they used to love,” she continues. “Put on one of their favorite songs. Tell a story about them. Cry about them. Call one of their friends you haven’t talked to in a while. Be kind and patient with yourself. Don’t grieve in silence. You’re not alone.”
Earlier this fall, Lourd honored her mom for what would have been the actress’s 63rd birthday. She shared a beautiful video of herself singing a cover of her mom’s favorite song, “American Girl” while sitting in the bathtub of Fisher’s old home. It’s breathtaking.
“Not that I’m some kind of grief expert by any means, but on milestones (or whatever you want to call them) like this, I like to celebrate her by doing things that she loved to do,” she writes about life after losing her mom, or “Momby,” as she lovingly refers to Fisher. “So here’s a little video of me singing one of her favorite songs (American girl by Tom petty) in one of her favorite places (her bathtub of course). I’ll probably have a pint of vanilla haggen daaz and a Coca Cola for dinner.”
Fisher died at the age of 60 on December 27, 2016, days after suffering a heart attack on an international flight. Reynolds died one day later at the age of 84. That type of staggering, double loss is beyond anything a daughter and granddaughter should have to cope with, and Lourd is generous in sharing how she manages to mourn their losses while celebrating their lives at the same time.
Both mom and daughter can be seen in Star Wars: The Rise of Skywalker, in theaters now. Though Fisher died before filming began, unused footage of Fisher in her iconic role as Princess Leia from The Force Awakens was used in the new film.