Parenting

Teen Brings Home Interactive Baby For Class And It Goes About As Well As You'd Think

by Julie Scagell
Image via Lawren Galloway

She asked her mom to take it in the middle of the night because he wouldn’t stop crying

If you have tweens or teens, you know how hard it is to get them to do anything. Asking them to clean their room, wash their clothes, or put an empty box of Diet Coke in the garbage after they take the last one feels a bit akin to torture. So you can imagine how well things went when one mom had to witness her daughter take care of a fake baby for a few days for a class assignment.

“Meet William. He’s Olivia’s interactive baby assignment for her Early Childhood Education Class,” her mom, Lawren Galloway, wrote on Facebook. “Now, meet Olivia with William. She’s had him since Friday night. She is absolutely exhausted and ready to quit the class and give William back. (Maybe even throw him back).”

Oh, Olivia. He probably looked harmless enough when you picked him up from class. Then, he needed to be fed, rocked to sleep, burped — it’s all a little much. My daughter’s friend brought her fake baby, Emma, over a few weeks ago. And when I say these babies cry, I mean they wail. I had flashbacks to sleepless nights and colicky babies and told her in no uncertain terms Emma would need to be kept a fair distance from me and good luck with all that.

“It’s definitely been a learning experience,” Galloway continued. “My favorite moment so far is when she came into my room last night around 3 am. She was crying real tears while feeding him his bottle. She was begging me to help her because she just wanted to get some sleep.” Mom’s answer? “Yeah, no.”

What even funnier about that entire exchange is that Galloway tells Scary Mommy Olivia is the oldest of her four kids. The youngest? Just three weeks old. Hahahahahahaha. This is only something a teenager would be brave enough to ask. But the good fairy was watching and Olivia was in for more than just a sleepless night.

“Sunday night, William magically started crying as soon as I set the table for dinner — it was almost like he knew,” Galloway said. “Long story short, Olivia had to warm her plate up three times. His feedings were taking nearly 20 minutes, he required a burp, diaper change, and about 12 minutes of rocking.” That sounds awfully familiar. Bless.

Apparently, her night didn’t look up from there. Olivia went to take a shower and loaded William up in his car seat and took him in the bathroom with her. “She finished up rather quickly and explained that she decided to take a bath instead,” Galloway said. “She didn’t have time to wash her hair and was afraid he would start crying and need her.” Fake or real, kids have been getting in the way of self-care since forever.

“Having siblings in NO way prepared her for what it might be like to have her own child,” Galloway tells us. “This assignment should be mandatory for both boys and girls in high school.”

After all that hard work, poor Olivia didn’t do so hot in the grade department. In addition to not providing proper head support, it appears she also didn’t like rocking William and only fed him 85 percent of the time. Babies are hard. We feel you, girl.

Image via Lawren Galloway

“Luckily, she has the opportunity to take home another baby to bring up her grade,” her mom said. The jury’s still out on whether Olivia (or William) really want to go through this experience again.