Of Course: Study Finds Men Who Want Tradwives Score High On “Hostile Sexism,” Not Chivalry

When our grandmothers were young, the entire point of being a woman was to become a perfect, happy little homemaker. To take care of the kids and the house, but ultimately, to take care of a husband, who deserved to end the day in a domain exactly fluffed to his liking. It’s a very specific nostalgia for that kind of energy that has fueled the #tradwife movement. The social media “trend” has pushed women to do things like cater to their husbands’ every need, spend all of their time and energy on the home and their family, and put themselves last.

And a study published in Psychology of Women Quarterly has found that the men who most want a #tradwife... are also men who seem to view women the worst.

Oh nooo, what do you meeeean?

*looks directly to camera*

University of Nevada, Las Vegas (UNLV) conducted the study and found that “men with higher levels of ‘hostile sexism’ — or those who espouse negative, adversarial perceptions of women in general — are particularly likely to support the #tradwife movement relative to other men.”

In the study, 595 U.S. men ages 18 to 29 were surveyed (a narrow but revealing slice) about what they knew of the #tradwife movement, as well as their attitudes, and whether identifiers like political or religious affiliation or race affected those views.

Originally, the authors thought “benevolent sexism” would explain why these men liked the #tradwife movement. Instead, the “hostile sexism” came out on top. This included “derisive and derogatory descriptions of women’s caretaking role as ‘easier than the breadwinning role’” and also that these wives were “exploitative of their husbands’ provisions.”

Ew.

UNLV psychology professor Rachael D. Robnett, lead author on the study, said the data showed that men who are into the #tradwife trend are also aware that they rely on these same women for intimacy and resent it. “This finding runs counter to social media portrayals of the tradwife lifestyle, which tend to emphasize subtle forms of sexism that are more aligned with chivalry,” she said.

And she’s right. When you find popular #tradwife accounts, it’s all about taking care of your husband because he takes care of you — that’s the “benevolent sexism” the study thought it would find. He goes to work every day and earns money so you can stay home in your floral nap dresses and film GRWM videos of yourself making butter and wearing a silk curling rod. The least you can do is make sure he has fresh sourdough bread with his pasta when he gets home, right?

It’s all framed as devotion, not labor: taking care of the kids, managing all the pets, cleaning everything in sight, keeping chemicals out of your pantry and your “drink fridge” fully stocked.

That sexism — that belief that men deserve the world because they are a man — can be misconstrued as love and comfort and chivalry in these videos. What the study found, though, is something uglier. The same men who want a little woman waiting on them and managing everything are the men most likely to dismiss that labor, to believe they are superior to women, and to be resentful over having to work “harder” than their wives.

Although let’s be honest, those #tradwife videos are probably making more money than hubby is at his job.

The problem with a #tradwife isn’t the domestic choices, but what drives them. It’s fine to be a wife who stays home, takes care of the family, makes all of her recipes from scratch, does the majority of the cleaning and home managing — whatever works for you and fits the life you want. But if you’re doing all of these things with your husband front and center or doing them out of fear of losing your husband? Then it’s time to regroup.

Because, babe, nobody should feel resentful of the other in a marriage... especially not the person being fed homemade meals and having their clothes washed by someone else.