Ladies, you’re gorgeous because you are — not because a man signs off on your body
Author and activist Robbie Tripp is a good man. With eyes. He has a gorgeous wife, and he’d like to tell the world that he actually loves her — even though she’s not a Cosmo model.
The post is going insanely viral — the entire internet loves it and can’t stop praising him for being woke enough to love his wife.
“As a teenager, I was often teased by my friends for my attraction to girls on the thicker side, ones who were shorter and curvier, girls that the average (basic) bro might refer to as ‘chubby’ or even ‘fat,'” he admits.
That must’ve been difficult. I wonder how he got through that.
“Then, as I became a man and started to educate myself on issues such as feminism and how the media marginalizes women by portraying a very narrow and very specific standard of beauty (thin, tall, lean) I realized how many men have bought into that lie,” he writes. “For me, there is nothing sexier than this woman right here: thick thighs, big booty, cute little side roll, etc. Her shape and size won’t be the one featured on the cover of Cosmopolitan but it’s the one featured in my life and in my heart.”
He’s describing his wife — gorgeous, body-positive fashion blogger Sarah Tripp.
The internet just can’t stop swooning over Robbie’s brave admission that he likes women with curves. And he’s obviously a great guy — and definitely an ally to the body positive cause. But women — you’re gorgeous because you are, not because a man agrees. Or compliments your “cute little side roll.” Reducing a woman to her body is reducing her to her body — whether you think it’s slamming or chubby.
“There’s nothing sexier to me than a woman who is both curvy and confident; this gorgeous girl I married fills out every inch of her jeans and is still the most beautiful one in the room,” he writes. Oh for the love of god and everything holy — is this where we are, women? Is this how bad we feel about ourselves? That we’ll rain compliments on a man who simply has eyes and can see his gorgeous wife in front of him?
“Guys, rethink what society has told you that you should desire. A real woman is not a porn star or a bikini mannequin or a movie character. She’s real. She has beautiful stretch marks on her hips and cute little dimples on her booty,” he writes. “Girls, don’t ever fool yourself by thinking you have to fit a certain mold to be loved and appreciated. There is a guy out there who is going to celebrate you for exactly who you are, someone who will love you like I love my Sarah.”
I know. Right now you’re thinking I’m just a negative feminist who can’t appreciate anything. So let’s try a little reversal. We’re so used to people taking ownership over our bodies and dissecting them from every angle — sometimes it’s truly hard to see when something is problematic. Let’s flip the script and see how it sounds to you.
Would an Instagram post that said the following — written by a woman — ever be praised by the entire internet?
I love this man and his thin, pale body. As a teenager, I was often teased by my friends for my attraction to skinny guys with questionable facial hair, ones who were weaker and not athletic, boys that the average (basic) chick might refer to as “pasty” or even “mediocre.” Then, as I became a woman and started to educate myself on issues such as how the media constantly applauds men for everything they do, I realized how many men have bought into that lie. For me, there is nothing sexier than this man right here: weak chin, pale legs, cute little Miami Vice-era facial hair, etc. His shape and size won’t be the one featured on the cover of Esquire, but it’s the one featured in my life and in my heart. There’s nothing sexier to me than a man who is both totally average and confident; this cute man I married has never filled out a muscle shirt in his life and is still the hottest guy in the room. Girls, rethink what society has told you that you should desire. A real man is not a porn star or a underwear model or a movie character. He’s real. He has quirky facial hair, a receding hair line, beautiful scrawny legs and cute pale arms. Boys, don’t ever fool yourself by thinking you have to fit a certain mold to be loved and appreciated. There is a girl out there who is going to celebrate you for exactly who you are, someone who will love you like I love my Robbie.
What do you think? Rude? Condescending? Patronizing? You’re probably thinking… what the hell is this?
That’s because we’re not used to dissecting men and all their perceived “flaws.” If a woman posted this, she would be declared a delusional bitch, and shamed all over the internet. But a man does it and he’s a damn hero. I’m not knocking Robbie — he clearly loves his lady. But come on, y’all.
So a man actually appreciates everything about his woman that makes her unique and beautiful. Awesome. But ladies, that is baseline what you need to be expecting from your men — or anyone else in your life.
Don’t believe the hype. We’re awesome because we are — not because a man looks at our bodies and approves.
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