This mom has some choice words for a stranger at the pool who told her she shouldn’t wear a bikini
When a woman has a baby, it seems like people flip their shit and decide it’s OK to comment on any number of things. This includes but isn’t limited to: how they feed their child, how they put them to sleep, whether they go on date nights, etc. The scrutiny is endless but the most egregious offense by far is when people pick apart how a mom dresses her post-baby body.
God, I hate that term.
Lexi Sinclair decided enough was enough when a woman at the pool thought it was her place to tell her what kind of bathing suit she should wear. The mom took to Facebook with a photo of herself in the “offending” suit and explained her response, which was grade A perfection.
According to Sinclair’s account, a woman struck up a conversation asking innocent questions about her baby but was apparently just teeing up before getting to the real purpose in approaching her. Which was to school her on how “inappropriate” a bikini is for a mom. Because obviously, we should all join a convent and don habits now that we’ve expelled the placenta and are applying for sainthood.
Give me a break.
Sinclair writes that after the litany of baby inquiries, “She then proceeded to tell me that the men at the pool would feel more comfortable if I was in a one-piece swim suit because a bikini isn’t appropriate for a mother, especially one who’s “still recovering.”
Sinclair, who then refers to herself as a “crazy, ballsy woman,” (high five!) schooled this nosy jerk right back.
“I just smiled, kissed my son and told her, “I’m proud of my body. In just one year I’ve gained 50 pounds, and lost 37. I’ve grown a human and given birth to a beautiful miracle. My body provided food for my child. So, no, my body might not be the best sight for other men to see. My stretch marks and tummy pudge might not be sexy. But they’re proof that I’ve done something amazing, and I have a man that loves me and finds me even sexier and more beautiful now. To be honest, I don’t give a tiny rats ass what other men, or a prissy twit like you think. Have a nice day though.”
Sinclair beautifully addresses the gross insinuation that she, or any woman, should dress for the eyes of men. Who in the world cares about how comfortable a man is with her post-birth body? Which is, by the way, totally gorgeous and nothing to be ashamed of. Yes, she has the marks of motherhood, but why should she cover that up? As she says, she’s done something amazing and she feels sexy and attractive in her bathing suit, so why would anyone else’s opinion matter?
Sinclair’s words certainly struck a chord with me. When I wear my bikini, I wear it for myself only. I wear it because I hate the feel of a slimy, wet one-piece on my stomach. I wear it because going to the bathroom in a one-piece is annoying. I wear it because I have a short torso and my bikinis make me look a little longer. And you know what? I wear it because I fucking like bikinis. End of story.
I used to care that I had an “up and down” scar from my first c-section. I used to care that I had stretch marks around my belly button. But over the last few years, I’ve gotten into the best shape of my life and while I’ll never be perfect, I’m proud of how I look. The idea that anyone thinks just because I’m a mother I shouldn’t wear a bikini makes me rage. No one decides what’s appropriate for me to wear but me.
Kudos to this mom for standing up for herself and having the confidence to wear whatever the hell she feels comfortable in. Hopefully, the woman who tried to tell her otherwise won’t be so bold next time.