Is 9 The Best Age Ever? This Mom Describes It Beautifully

At what age are kids most enjoyable? That debate has probably raged on since time immemorial among parents who found themselves stumbling through toddlerhood but thriving with teens around, or struggling to discipline a headstrong tween when they felt most themselves with a baby in one arm. On r/Mommit, user SecretBabyBump posted about a trip she and her 9-year-old son took together, asking other users if this really is the best age ever, or if her son could possibly get any better.

“For his birthday I took him on a special weekend trip just him and I. We drove five hours away to a little resort town with a fantastic theater where he is seeing his first Shakespeare play. We talked the WHOLE WAY down. The whole car ride! We listened to some history podcasts, talked about them, looked up more podcasts about stuff we talked about, talked about them some more. Talked about God, the nature of the divine and what we think happens when we die (?!?!?) He brought it up mostly? like I asked clarifying questions but was definitely NOT planning on talking about THE BIG STUFF in the car on the way out of town.”

She goes on to say they saw their play and had a fancy dinner together, where her son chatted up the waitress and was just all around precious. “When did he turn into a little man? Is this it? Is it downhill after this? Because there’s no way it can get better,” she wrote. “Moms with tiny tots... it’s so so so worth it. There were definitely days when he was 3 that I was legitimately worried I was raising a psychopath. I didn’t! It’ll be okay.”

While the merit of the newborn stage and terrible twos are hotly contested, the comments on this post all suggest that ages 8 to 10 are indeed a sweet spot for most kids.

“It's one of the best. 8 to about 11 is really fun. Then 12 to 14 is a challenge. But then 14 to 18 is pretty amazing and adult kids are the best,” the top comment reads. One commenter, a teacher and mom, said, “It gets better... Better and better and better. Enjoy every single second. These little people are the most fantastic thing ever and, as long as you listen, you'll have these kinds of memories forever.”

Another commenter chalked up the wonder of 9 year olds to them being in a perfect developmental stage. “They know a little bit of patience and empathy. They understand cause and effect — consequences!!! My 10 year old knows good jokes AND he appreciates funny moments as they happen. He listens and still wants to hang out with us. He has no sharp edges or resentment. There is no pretense or trying to be cool. He just understands things and is enjoyable to be around.”

Other moms point out that actually yeah, their 9 year olds still have two feet firmly planted in childhood — they don’t feel embarrassed to hold hands or get a kiss from Mom in the car line. They want to hang out with their parents first and foremost still. And their conversations and questions are genuinely interesting, and when you can share interests (like Shakespeare plays and fancy dinners), well, then the fun can really begin.

Every mom is unique — we each have our own preferences and baggage and nervous systems that all thrive under different circumstances. While some of us may have adored those hazy newborn days, others among us shiver when we recall them. Some moms adore squishy, bull-headed toddlers, and others would rather give birth 10 times in exchange for skipping the 2- and 3-year-old ages. But for those of us parents with young kids, it’s comforting to know there’s a pretty universal light at the end of the tunnel when we will see all the love we’ve poured into our kids pay off. And it sounds like it happens somewhere around age 9.