“I’d like to receive a well-lit, costumed and styled dick pic” said no woman, ever. The thought of a dick photoshoot complete with costumes may be previously unheard of, but it’s taking the internet by storm. Apparently we never knew how much we’d love to see a dick dressed up as Napolean, Fidel Castro, Waldo, or Kanye West.
Soraya Doolbaz is a self-described professional penis photographer. You read that right: she takes photos of dicks for a living. She explains on her website, Dicture Gallery, “I’ve gotten my fair share of dick pics over the years and most of my single friends had as well. We would show them to each other and compare. These dick pics varied in quality depending on the guy and the relationship (Gay guys really do take the best dick pics). I thought it would be funny to treat dick pics like a high fashion photo shoot. So, I put clothes on penises and the rest is history!”
Doolbaz uses costumes to dress up the penises as characters. The inspiration struck one day when she was walking through a WalMart and saw a bunch of doll clothes: “I put two and two together and thought that I could make a personality out of penises.” She purchases dolls and action figures then uses the costumes to dress up her “subjects.”
There’s a wide variety of very NSFW images in her gallery, but here are some highlights. You can click through for the full, NSFW image:
Donald “The Dick” Trump
Napoleon Boner Part
Couples come in together and seem to have a blast. Doolbaz requires that a partner is present to help with costumes and to maintain the — ahem — dignified stature needed to put a costume on a penis. “Women want to laugh, so I think having a costume or character added to the dick pic takes the vulgarity away, while still getting the point across,” she said.
She’s crafted a penis empire. She sold limited edition pieces at Art Basel this year for $10,000. She also has a very accessible store for those of us who are on a limited budget. The 2016 Dicture calendar can be yours for $30.
Here’s a video Doolbaz did for the NY Post that explains her whole, genius empire. Anniversary presents, anyone? “It’s surprising and very delightful that people like dick on things,” she told the Post.
Why yes. Yes, it is.