10 Ways Your Husband Is Just Another Child

1. He gets so hungry on outings as a family, you give him the protein bar you keep for the kids in your purse for snack emergencies.

2. He would rather play video games than clean the garage or do any chores.

3. He’ll leave his underwear on the bathroom floor.

4. He forgets to hang up his towel.

5. He leaves his ice cream bar wrapper on the end table by the couch.

6. You have to remind him where things go in the kitchen.

7. He would rather stay up and watch a stupid TV show than go to bed at a reasonable hour.

8. When you ask him to take the garbage out, he rolls his eyes.

9. He needs to be reminded to not eat junk food when he goes out with his friends.

10. He stashes his brussel sprouts to the side of the plate hoping you won’t notice he didn’t eat them.

About the writer

Rebecca Gallagher writes for Frugalistablog and is a mom, wife and minivan driver. She likes sarcasm, Daniel Craig and croissants. Not necessarily in that order. You can find Frugalistablog on Twitter @rebeccatg88, Facebook and Pinterest.

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Mommy Monster 2 years ago

Bahaha. I’m right there with you. Let’s add, for road trips,
11. Insists on drinking soda and coffee nonstop when not driving, and then stops to pee every hour.

And, for around the house,
12. “Will do it later” until time to get ready for work, when suddenly “I don’t have time” and “I’ll do it when I get home” come into play. Then, when we run out of clean cups, “why didn’t you do these? You were home all day.”

Or, better yet
13. Needs two hours of alone time in the morning to get ready, but can’t watch the baby for twenty minutes for you to finally shave your legs (which he then complains about being unshaven).

Planet Ringo 2 years ago

Thank you, DJ Moore. We men are not perfect, but we appreciate it when a woman acknowledges our effort to be good husbands.

DJ Moore 2 years ago

So glad my Husband is a man and PARTNER to me and is nothing like what some of you are married to. I don’t try to control what he eats, he’s a grown man he knows what’s good for him and what’s not. Heck I would rather play video games then take out the trash but if I see it’s full I take it out it’s not just HIS job. We both cook and we both know where things go in the kitchen. So what if there is a ice cream wrapper left on the coffee table stop complaining and throw it away. My husband does laundry as much as I do. Yes once in awhile he stays up late and watches TV that gives me time to read with the bedside light on that would normally keep him awake. We both HATE brussel sprouts they will never be in this house. And I don’t care what he eats when he goes out with friends once again he’s a GROWN MAN he can make his own choices. I married a man who is my partner and not a child. Who helps me with my Special Needs Daughter. And I am so sick of these articles that bash all men when not all men are lazy.

Cheryl 2 years ago

Let someone write “10 Ways Your Wife Is A Manipulative Brat” and I’m sure the moron who wrote this article and other women would have a conniption fit. It is getting lamer and lamer to bash men for no reason. It is not funny or cute.

Daddy Files 2 years ago

Wow. Despite expending so much effort on your “Man-Child” husbands you still find the time to whine and criticize them in online forums. You gals really can do it all…

beta dad 2 years ago

I know this was supposed to be funny, but it’s desperately sad to me in so many ways.

Mercy 3 years ago

I must have a special man as he doesn’t do any of these.

But he does have ways in which he is childish. He loves Marvel superheros and has all the recent movies memorized. He will watch cartoons of the same characters, and woe to any person who says anything against them. He recently told me that superheros are his religion. :)

Another way is when he’s sick. Sometimes he will work through it and other times he spends the day in front of the t.v. And if he is playing sports with children, not men his age mind you but children, he just has to win. He won’t let them win ever.

I guess every man has some way in which he never grows up.

Angela 3 years ago

Ladies, What are you all doing with my husband???

😉
You nailed it, snack food munching, wrapper strewing, non-veggie eating TV watcher. God help us all.

Leslie 3 years ago

While reading I was certain we were married to the same man. Except you made no mention of the Mnt. Dew cans left EVERYWHERE! I swear they (him & the kids) believe there is a monster inside the trash can or recycle bin just waiting to bite off their hand if they throw anything away.

Paige Kellerman 3 years ago

I was gonna say the Popsicle one wasn’t always true, but then I found three on his bedside table, so….

Katia 3 years ago

Well, that actually sounds a little like me minus the Sportcenter. 😛

Wendy 3 years ago

My husband does this also!!

Wendy 3 years ago

Oh my goodness!! I’m so glad my husband is not the only one… Haha… When he’s sick he also acts like a toddler and does not( no matter how much I explain) know the difference between Tylenol and benodryl!!!

Frugalistablog 3 years ago

Ha ha!! Scurvy! Or mac n cheese, as in my husband’s case.

Frugalistablog 3 years ago

Isn’t it though?

Frugalistablog 3 years ago

You vent all you need to! Mine always complains how tired he is and then he’s still on the couch watching Sportscenter at 11!

Frugalistablog 3 years ago

Agreed!! Love mine to bits, but dang he’s useless sometimes!

Frugalistablog 3 years ago

It’s so odd, but fascinating!

Hollow tree ventures 3 years ago

Very funny list! I’m fortunate that my husband is probably better about most of that stuff than I am – except 7, maybe. That guy stays up at night like it’s his job.

Mercy 3 years ago

I hate when mine winds the kids up before bedtime and keeps them up late, then goes and crashes in bed while I have to deal with the aftermath.

Amber 3 years ago

He has lots of friends but not brothers, I should say. :)

Amber 3 years ago

haha, I’ll ask! 😉

Selim Yeniceri 3 years ago

Looking at this list, I can proudly say I’m an adult (well, I think my wife-mom trained me so well, or it’s personality or something). But the list is perfectly true, looking at most of my husband-child friends. :) Wonderful post!

Frugalistablog 3 years ago

It’s okay, I’ve heard that too. Does your husband actually know where stuff is AND put his shorts in the hamper? You have a winner there.

Frugalistablog 3 years ago

I’m sure I have some annoying habits too… I’ll get back to you after I think of some. :)

Frugalistablog 3 years ago

You got that right!

Frugalistablog 3 years ago

Hey, your partner is the yin to your yang, no worries!

Frugalistablog 3 years ago

Or me asking, “honey, can you let the dog up while you’re up?” Really? Really?

Frugalistablog 3 years ago

Yes you are. And does he have any brothers? I’m asking for a friend.

Frugalistablog 3 years ago

I’ve heard that from some of the ladies! I guess there’s always balance.

Frugalistablog 3 years ago

Or when they want credit for something little like, “I put the recycling bins out.” Wow, would you like a trophy for that?

Frugalistablog 3 years ago

The other day, “where’s the pizza cutter?” Same drawer it’s been in for 10 years babe.

Frugalistablog 3 years ago

You are only 60% manchild. Way to go!

Frugalistablog 3 years ago

Yes they do!! Or we call it, ‘refrigerator blindness’. It’s right in front of you doofus!

Marcia Carter 3 years ago

Oh, and we mustn’t forget, men lack the gene to find things. Even if you’ve just described everything surrounding the missing item, and he is staring at entire scene.

Marcia Carter 3 years ago

Then there’s the loud snores punctuated with loud outbursts of “I’m NOT asleep!”
And may I add, the inability to take the teasing he so loves to dish out!

Andrew McAllister 3 years ago

Not guilty of 2, 6, 8 and 10. What does it say about me that I’m (only occasionally) guilty of the “odd” ones?

Katia 3 years ago

Glad to be of assistance :-)

JD Bailey @ Honest Mom 3 years ago

#6! Every time! How long have we lived in this damn house? 6 years. And can he remember where the spatula goes? No. LOL!

Shannon 3 years ago

I am so happy to know I am not the only one! His alarm rings throughout the house and yet he never hears it. I have to go wake him up at least 3 times before he gets out of bed.

Tiffany 3 years ago

you forgot one, the constant need for assurance. “yes, thank you for cleaning the dishes… with hand soap… using a metal scouring pad on my Teflon pan… you did such a good job!”

Kristen Brakeman 3 years ago

Wow my husband does very few of these things on this list.
But I’m guilty of quite a few!

Amber 3 years ago

My husband is none of these. Jesus, I’m a lucky girl. 😉

Keesha 3 years ago

It’s all about that garbage one for me. And that is everything!

MomMom 3 years ago

Hahaha. That’s awesome! I’m going to have to try that one. Mine still has clothes from high school….and we are 26! Although i am jealous he can still fit into his hs clothes lol.

amber` 3 years ago

Is it bad when I am pretty sure I can claim some of those things on that list for myself……. ????? Oh well at least I am in good company lol

Nicole(Whole Strides) 3 years ago

It’s pretty hilarious. You just have to step back and laugh about it or else you’ll lose your mind.

Observacious 3 years ago

I feel bad that we are picking on the husbands, but yeah, a lot of those are true. (Although mine doesn’t leave laundry on the floor. He puts it on the hamper. *On* the hamper. Not in it?! You are right there! I do not understand this behavior at all.)

Wendy 3 years ago

I don’t know if this is my husband or me!

Bryan F 3 years ago

Well from the other side, I love Brussel Sprouts and all Vegetables I went to the Culinary Institute of America and would adore cooking for my Late wife just one more time. It is true about getting sick there is no bigger baby then me, However when my Dawn Ellen was Diagnosed with ALS I never Left her side and if she needed anything I did it. We always made the bed’s together I suffered from PTSD for years and sleeping in separate beds were safer for her and the dogs . What’s a Clothes Hamper? I like too read no patience for video games. You know ladies I would glady surrender my boy parts if I could have my Dear Dawn Ellen I miss her as much as any of you would miss your man were he gone we all love to bitch but remember what your bitching about.

Sarah M 3 years ago

OMG. He’s worse to feed then the kids. He refuses to eat ANYTHING with vegetables.
You missed the biggest one, though…when they get sick. We all joke about it, but it’s SO true. The smallest little cold, they’re passed out in bed. When it’s us we’re still doing everything we would normally do. And they need to tell us every 5 seconds. “UGH I don’t feel good….” Gee thanks! I couldn’t tell by your absolute willingness to do anything and your constant whining that you were.

Scarlet 3 years ago

#13 – Yes! I was lying in bed hoping my intestines would just leave my body because that couldn’t feel worse than the way I was feeling when my husband said, “So I guess I have to take care of the kids.” I ended up crawling out of bed half an hour later. But karma’s a bitch. He got the same thing the next day (and of course was “dying”). He no longer makes remarks like that. Lesson learned.

TBag 3 years ago

Timing is perfect…just touched on this same subject in my post today. Although he IS good about taking out the garbage….

Tanya 3 years ago

The only one my husband is guilty of the the video games. He likes his down time.(He does deserves it though, He works really hard at his job.)

Jenny Isenman AKA Jenny From the Blog 3 years ago

I’ve always said hubby is child number 3, though he’s way more work than 1 and 2 and also I want nothing to do with his feet or his vomit, so technically he’s like the sad child that doesn’t even get the restraint of the normal mommy gag reflex.

Rebecca 3 years ago

Completely accurate, but surely there must be more than 10. . .

Allison 3 years ago

Mine reminds me of a boy when he watches MMA or wrestling

Exhaustomom 3 years ago

Sooooo true about the clothing! Mine has no idea how to dess appropriately, I often buy him stylish clothes and he says he hates them. I sneak them into his closet. Weeks later he will come out wearing something I bought,asking where it came from. I pretend I don’t know and he ends up wearing them. HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!

Frugalistablog 3 years ago

It’s good of you to admit. Pre-rolled eyes… ha!

Frugalistablog 3 years ago

I did forget those- you are right!

Frugalistablog 3 years ago

Yes, yes, yes!! Why don’t they know how to make beds? And man-colds- don’t even get me started.

Frugalistablog 3 years ago

You are fortunate! Yay!

Frugalistablog 3 years ago

Well he sounds like a pretty good catch then! A neat freak? I don’t even know what that is.

MomMom 3 years ago

12.) How about the fact that you have to check his outfit before leaving for any important event! Mine knows he has no sense of style or whats appropriate lol. He’ll come to me like a toddler and go “Does this look okaaaaay?”. Followed by “but why can’t i wear a shirt with a hole in it?!”
13.) That are just as messy! Every morning i have to re-clean the kitchen i had spotless before i went to bed. Looks like my toddler got up and had a munchie party while i was sleeping…

Frugalistablog 3 years ago

Or they don’t even make it in the hamper to begin with!! Ugh. I like brussel sprouts too.

MomMom 3 years ago

Yes! How many times do i have to explain to a 26 year old what the difference is between tylenol and dayquil?!

Molly 3 years ago

Not sure how all you women can stand this! LOL! I can’t stay that I would still be married if this was the picture of my husband. Only #7 he is guilty of….which doesn’t bother me in the least.

Christina 3 years ago

Number 5 and number 7: dead on.

HouseTalkN 3 years ago

I’ve taken to husband shaming when my fella acts like a toddler. I took his forgotten towel, dirty laundry left on the floor, and his breakfast plate and placed them on his side of the bed. Immature yet effective.

Denise 3 years ago

Seeing how the hubster pays for the house and groceries and every other dang thing around here, I’ll let him play games all night if he wants. Of course my “third” child also does dishes, changes the oil and mowes the yard. I’m not complaining too much.

Mary 3 years ago

I forgot to say that all the hubby is pretty great and only meets a few of these points, you forgot to add, “total baby when sick”. Why is it the man gets to crawl into bed and sleep all day when sick and moms are expected to function. Although I remember one time I got the stomach flu for two days. He kept the kids on a different level of the house for those two days and only entered the room I was in to refill my water and Sprite glasses.

Kerri @ Elbows Deep in Someone Elses’s Sh*t 3 years ago

Let me also add that if I wasn’t here I’m pretty sure the dude would die of scurvy because there is no vitamin C in Ramen.

Kerri @ Elbows Deep in Someone Elses’s Sh*t 3 years ago

All of these are so true!! My husband is the pickiest eater in the house! And forget the underwear on the bathroom floor, he leaves a trail of clothes from the front door to the back bathroom because he HAS to take a shower as soon as he gets home. How do husbands even survive in the wild?!

Carly 3 years ago

Mine will REFUSE to take said medications and instead whine and whimper about how terrible he feels.

JustMe 3 years ago

I gotta say, that picture is disturbing.

Colleen 3 years ago

Sadly alot of this true. Mine gets super cranky and nasty when hungry. Leaves clothes all over the living room cause he gets too hot from the heat being on while playing that damn xbox. And proceeds to leave said clothes there over night cause hes half asleep when he makes it to bed which leads him to be cranky in the morning cause he didnt get enough sleep. its a vicious cycle.

Katia 3 years ago

Yes! 36 Year Old is a teenager. So I have an infant and a toddler and a teenager. I wake up to take care of the first two anytime between 4-6am but have to constantly go back upstairs and wake up the teenager, so he doesn’t lose his job. Thank you, felt therapeutic to get this off my chest.

Starla 3 years ago

11. Always asks, ‘Where is….? Have you seen my…?’ as a matter of fact, he just called me to ask me if his jacket was here at the house, yet tells the kids that their stuff is their responsibility.
12. Def. Agree w a previous poster about when they’re sick. How is it that we can have the exact same illness and he’s bedridden for days while I am still up being Mom and taking care of the household chores?
13. LOL just yesterday he called on his way home from work and asked what the kids had for after-school snack because he was hungry and wanted a snack before dinner.

He is an involved Dad, even volunteers to coach football and baseball here in our community but bless his heart he hasn’t a clue how to run the house. If I were to go back to work, this place would crumble….QUICKLY!

Suzanne @ Fit Minded Mom 3 years ago

Wow, I lucked out because my hubby doesn’t fall into any of these categories. I couldn’t handle a lazy ass living in my house, so thank goodness he isn’t!!

Elizabeth 3 years ago

Whew… only 2 of those are true for my hubby. But I suppose I could add a couple more that apply for us. The first one that comes to mind is tuning me out when I am talking to him (more likely to happen if the TV is on)! Sheesh, I’m not that long winded… I just need 30 seconds of focus.

Robyn 3 years ago

I have had to stop at local restaurants or gas station because he forgot to go pee before we left the house. I am so glad I’m not the only one lol

Shannon 3 years ago

Wow!!! How do you know my husband so well??!!!

Melissa 3 years ago

3 and 4 are my husband for SURE! Everything else my husband doesn’t do… I do 😉

Candy 3 years ago

Which is why I am divorced with no intention of every marrying again…life is so much easier this way.

exhaustomom 3 years ago

# 13! totally true! and acts completely bewildered about what medications to take for illness! drives me nuts!

exhaustomom 3 years ago

You forgot:

11. Thinks farts are hysterical
12. Thinks you can cook things without reading instructions
13. Gets kids completely wound up before bed time
14. “Tattles” on kids instead of handling situations by himself

Evin Cooper 3 years ago

Holy crap that’s great and so spot on.. I have to admit I went into this with pre-rolled eyes… but damn that’s all true – and I’m not even married, just shacked up. Let’s add “Pitches a fit when you tell him he can’t wear jeans to Grandma’s funeral”

Stephanie 3 years ago

Oh, and I LOVE that graphic! Hilarious!

Stephanie 3 years ago

This is so sad, because it’s SO TRUE!

Debbie 3 years ago

These are really good. However i have to say that i am pretty lucky, even though mine doesn’t cook. He could if he has too. You did leave 2 out thought. Pees on the floor at times. And if he loses something it is always up to you to find it.

Thanks for the morning smiles!!!
Debbie

Jenny @ House Full of Pretty 3 years ago

Hilarious!! My husband totally scored an 8 on this one – apparently he’s not the only one who loves his brussel sprouts!

And can I add:
11. He can dunk a basketball with ease, yet seems to always miss the hamper with his dirty socks.
12. His bed making skills are so poor, I’d rather it be left unmade.
13. He’s 99% of the time pretty macho… until he gets sick and suddenly I’m married to a toddler.

Still love you, honey! :)

Ava 3 years ago

Gotta say I’m lucky on this one- my husband does NONE if these and in fact I wish he would be less of a clean freak sometimes! I would say the way mine acts like a kid is acting cranky if not enough food or sleep

Kristen Mae 3 years ago

My husband only does seven of those. (He doesn’t do numbers 2, 8, and 10.) Does that mean I’m lucky? Should I crack under the pressure and have a third child? Ohhhhhhhhhhhh NO. My hubs has other child-like habits that endear him to me as my third little (GIANT?) one… I wrote a blog post called “Only if I Grow a Second Set of Eyes, Honey…” about why two kids is enough… and my husband’s childlike antics is one of the primary reasons why this uterus is closed for business. 😉

Mary 3 years ago

Haha. My DH is the only one in the family who eats Brussels sprouts and loves them. He is also a neat freak. That being said, he does stay up too late watching tv, he does know where 75% of the kitchen stuff goes only because he will unload the dishwasher, he does not cook. But he does laugh about he doesn’t know where half the stuff in the house belongs. Even though everything is labeled.

Tinne from Tantrums and Tomatoes 3 years ago

All true, except for n°10. He rather likes Brussels Sprouts.
n°11 : he has a tantrum when his favorite shirt/socks/underwear/pants… are in the laundry and you need to forbid him from taking them out of the hamper because really NO you are not wearing that until the ketchup stain comes out!