1. Because that’s a great use for the allowance.
2. Funny. Funny kid.
3. A phishing scam from your own flesh and blood.
4. Dog. Dog is what’s for dinner.
5. If you say something enough times, they might just take you up on it.
6. Um, maybe double-check you’re texting your buddy and not your mom.
7. A valuable lesson in female anatomy.
8. So long, Drewy.
9. Recrimination via text over snack foods.
10. Awww, someday she will be too big to text to be tucked in.
11. Safety first.