Pregnant Women, This Comedian's Rant Will Give You Life

Comedian Ali Wong talks pregnancy and marriage in Netflix’s stand up special Baby Cobra

Pregnancy is hard, that’s no revelation. But even though it’s pretty damn miraculous when it’s happening to you, there’s never a shortage of people who say things like women have been doing this since the beginning of time, what’s the big deal? God forbid you complain that you’re tired, or you want a seat on the train, or that people keep touching you.

Enter your partner. He can do no wrong. Men get standing ovations for rubbing women’s feet, accompanying them to doctor’s appointments, and fetching snacks. What the fuck? We’re the ones making human beings, y’all.

Ali Wong talks pregnancy in her stand-up special for Netflix, Baby Cobra. She is your new queen, pregnant ladies.

“I can already see how a child can take its toll on a marriage because the baby hasn’t even come out yet and I am already so resentful towards my husband,” Wong says. “So much resentment. Especially when he asks me to do stuff around the house: Hey, can you wash the dishes? NO! Hey, can you water the plants? I AM NOT DOING JACK SHIT ANYMORE, I’M BUSY MAKING AN EYEBALL.”

“I can already see how there’s this crazy double standard in our society of how it takes so little to be considered a great dad,” she says. “It also takes so little to be considered a shitty mom. People praise my husband for coming to all of my doctor’s appointments with me. Oh my god! I can’t believe he comes to all those doctor’s appointments! He is so supportive! Guess who else has to go to those doctor’s appointments? ME. I’M THE STAR OF THE SHOW… but he’s the hero for playing Candy Crush while I get my blood drawn.”

Preach, girl. Preach.

You can watch Ali Wong in her comedy special Baby Cobra on Netflix.