This Post About Being ‘Done’ Breastfeeding Is So Relatable It Hurts

by Valerie Williams
Image via Instagram/Cameran Eubanks

Cameran Eubanks is “done” nursing and her reason is the only one she needs

Cameran Eubanks, star of the Bravo docuseries Southern Charm, had a baby three months ago. Before her child was born, Eubanks clued in the internet about her plans to nurse her baby in a brilliant video she shared to silence those with enough nerve to grill her about whether she was going to breastfed. Up until recently, she was nursing her child, and now she’s not.

And her reason for stopping is relatable AF.

In a world where moms are shamed for basically any feeding method, women who choose not to breastfeed for no other reason than the fact that they don’t want to are probably maligned more than most. There’s no shortage of sanctimommies and internet parenting judges out there who seem to take pleasure in shitting on a mother’s choice to not nurse her child, and Eubanks decided to get ahead of it with a short Instagram post explaining her decision to stop breastfeeding.

“Today marks the day I am DONE with breastfeeding,” she writes. “Gave it a good almost 3 months and I am retiring the boobs. Writing this in hopes it will make other mothers feel less alone.”

Usually when a mom tells her story about why she’s done nursing, it’s accompanied by a lengthy explanation of struggles encountered and her attempts at moving past those hurdles. From mastitis to low milk supply to latching issues, there’s plenty of reasons why a mom might have to stop breastfeeding before she wants to. But in Eubanks’ case? She just wanted to stop. Period.

“You see, I’m not quitting because my milk supply dried up or because I’m sick…I’m quitting because I’m just plain OVER IT. By CHOICE,” she writes.

And to that we say, a-freaking-men. It’s the only reason anyone needs to hear. It’s her body, it’s her choice — end of story.

“I know I will get lectured and judged by this but it doesn’t bother me,” she says. “I need some freedom back for my sanity and the bottle and formula will allow that.”

It sure will. I nursed my son exclusively — and not entirely by choice. I had planned on breastfeeding him for however long he wanted, but with bottles in there somewhere so I could get a break. Turns out, some breastfed babies aren’t into that, and after trying every type of bottle Babies R Us carried, I had to resign myself to being his sole source of nourishment until he could eat solid foods. Oh, and the only person who could comfort him or get him to sleep.

That regaining of sanity she speaks of? It’s so real. I had many moments of quietly resenting the stranglehold my son’s nursing habits had on me, and I can only imagine how much better I would’ve felt about motherhood in general had I been able to skip a feeding now and then.

There’s no prize in the end for mommy martyrdom, and if nursing is making you miserable? Quit. Without apology. Without a novel to explain your reasoning. You not wanting to breastfeed is more than reason enough — and Eubanks is here to remind you that how you feed your baby has no bearing on your mothering talents whatsoever.

“You are NOT a bad mother if you don’t like breastfeeding. A happy Mama is the best gift you can give your baby.”