If you’ve ever been cheated on, grab some popcorn and settle in with Nicole Cliffe’s latest Twitter thread
Everyone has a cheating story. Maybe you were the one who was cheated on, the one who got caught, or you just have some excellent tea on someone you know — in which case, this is the Twitter thread for you.
Writer Nicole Cliffe is basically the queen of crowdsourcing for good material on Twitter. Whether she’s scouring advice columns for the wackiest mother-in-law stories or deservedly shaming men with idiotic opinions on epidurals, she’s the go-to gal for juicy threads.
It all began with Cliffe live-tweeting The Edge — an old Alec Baldwin and Elle MacPherson film surrounding a salacious affair. Soon, people were chiming in with their own stories about being unfaithful, so Cliffe decided to start a thread.
Stories quickly began pouring in, and I’ve gotta say — some of them are more engrossing than a Danielle Steel novel.
I’m not going to lie to you, dear readers — I spent the better part of an hour reading through these responses.
Holy. Shit. Could you imagine just cruising through the paper, and there’s the GIANT wedding announcement featuring the person you’ve been dating and sleeping with? Just wait though, this is just the tip of the Infidelity Iceberg.
Many responses in this thread did a great job highlighting just how fucking stupid men are. It’s bad enough being a cheater, but being incredibly dumb about it too? Salt in the wound.
Because family holidays aren’t painful enough. Ugh, so much cringe.
OK, that fucker wanted to get caught. Tip: please don’t “dear diary” your cheating escapades. Ever. (Also…don’t cheat I guess.)
I wish I had, like, 1/4 the amount of ballsy balls it would take to do something like that with full confidence (and narcissism).
That is uncomfortably close to the Colin Firth plotline in Love Actually.
The girlfriend gets a steering wheel, the side piece gets jewelry. Comme ci comme ça.
I’ve been cheated on more than once, but the story that stands out to me after reading these tweets is the time my college boyfriend moved up to New England for grad school during my senior year of undergrad. During a phone call a few months after he was settled, I heard a girl in the background laughing and talking. I said, “who’s that?” And he said, “Oh, I have a new roommate.” Just like that. Totally breezy, like it was no big deal he had concealed this entire thing from me for months. Just him and some chick, living together in a cabin in the woods — no joke.
We did not work out. For many reasons. This is absolutely one of them.
The reason this entire thread is so worth reading isn’t because it’s cool to entertain yourself with other people’s misfortunes. It’s because we literally all experience misfortunes, and sometimes it’s nice to know we’re not alone in being deceived by dirtbags (or in having done dirtbaggy deeds).