Colors In a Mom's Box of Crayons

Most moms have spent the equivalent of 37 lifetimes coloring with their children, so (assuming you’ve ever been allowed to use a crayon that actually still has some wrapper left on it) you’re aware that, for the most part, real kids’ crayons tend to get cutesy names that are helpfully descriptive. Brick Red. Spring Green. Tickle Me Pink.

On the other hand, adults give things really vague color names that are basically just meant to sound fancy. A friend recently told me she painted her living room Braised Mushroom, and for the life of me I can’t imagine what color her living room is. Brownish pinkish gray? Hmm, sounds beautiful.

So it’s time to treat ourselves to a new box of crayons, moms—a box of crayons just for us. Not only will we finally get to color with crayons that aren’t broken into fingernail-sized chunks, we can also take this opportunity to give them practical names that only we could appreciate…