Disney’s sleep hotline is the answer to your bedtime struggles
If you’re having trouble getting your kids to bed and “Go the F*ck to Sleep” is a bit too hardcore for you, it’s Disney to the rescue.
That’s right, parents. If the bedtime routine is circling the drain and your kids don’t give a single shit about you telling them it’s time to sleep, let Mickey, Minnie, Goofy and the gang give it a shot. Disney’s Sleep Shop is offering a sleep hotline so parents can dial up their child’s most loved character and let them lay the bedtime smack down.
Just call 877-7-MICKEY and listen to the prompts so your sleep-fighting kiddo can chose who they want to hear from most. Or if you’re super desperate and can’t wait the 30 seconds or so for the recording dude to read off the choices, here’s a little cheat sheet:
Press 1 for Mickey, 2 for Minnie, 3 for Donald, 4 for Daisy, or 5 for Goofy. I tested it personally and made sure — you can totally just hit one of those numbers once you hear the recording start and get down to bedtime business immediately.
The hotline is in celebration of the company’s new sleepwear line launching and honestly, your kid in adorable Disney jams listening to their fave character tell them night-nights sounds pretty freaking cute.
Each call only allows for one character, but you can let your kid keep calling back to listen to each one if you’re in that desperate of a spot. I’m mentally sending glasses of wine to those of you requiring multiple dial-ins. Godspeed.
Of course there’s a chance your kid will see right through the fakery and hang up on their favorite Disney pal, but for a certain age group, this could be your one-way ticket to a glass or three of pinot and binge-watching Scandal in sweet, sweet silence.
Oh, and one more thing — the toll-free number is only available through August 31. I know. I wish it were a year-round thing too, but maybe Disney will hear our fervent prayers and make it so. If not, a bunch of us frustrated parents can get together and make our own dang hotline. Whatever works.