Buckle Up

Stephen Colbert Warns Audience To ‘Strap In’ Before Glorious Takedown Of Supreme Court

The Late Show host gloriously reacted to the conservative majority's leaked plan to overturn Roe v. Wade.

Stephen Colbert goes nuclear on the Supreme Court in abortion rights monologue on Tuesday night.

Stephen Colbert couldn’t contain his fury on Tuesday night as he reacted to the leaked draft of the majority opinion that showed the Supreme Court plans to overturn Roe v. Wade — or you know, take back a woman’s right to choose what to do with her own body.

The Late Show host told the audience to “strap in” as he launched into a searingly comical 10-minute monologue that took down the Court and its conservative leaders, including justices Samuel Alito, Clarence Thomas, Brett Kavanaugh, Neil Gorsuch and Amy Coney Barrett.

“I wanted to begin tonight’s show talking about the Met Gala,” he started. “I wanted to talk about their theme of, you know, glamour in the Gilded Age. Instead, I get to talk about another group of out-of-touch people in crazy outfits pretending that it’s 1895: the Supreme Court.”

“So congratulations, ladies,” Colbert he added to his viewers. “Decisions about what you can do with your body are now being made by four old dudes and a woman who thinks The Handmaid’s Tale is a rom-com.”

Colbert made dig after dig throughout his spot-on performance, which began and ended with CBS censors. He even had some words for “live-action Lady Elaine” Senator Susan Collins, who had faith in 2018 that Trump-nominated justices Gorsuch and Kavanaugh wouldn’t overturn the landmark 1973 abortion case. She was, obviously, very, very wrong.

Stephen Colbert broke down the leaked Roe v. Wade draft in his monologue on Tuesday night.

Colbert wasn’t the only late-night host to tackle the subject, which has rightfully enraged pro-choice and reproductive rights advocates. (Yes, we’re really still fighting for women’s rights in 2022.)

“Apparently, [the Supreme Court] decided masks aren’t mandatory but Mother’s Day is,” Jimmy Fallon said in his Tonight Show monologue. And Jimmy Kimmel’s fill-in Mike Birbiglia said “turns out they’re turning Handmaid’s Tale into a reality series.”

All jokes aside, it is devastating what this leaked draft could mean for abortion rights in the U.S. Although the Court insists the decision is not final, the opinion proves the majority of government leaders still think they can, and will, control women’s bodies.

Outraged? Good. Register to vote, and donate to abortion funds and clinics if you can.