Friends Vs. BFFs — A Comparative Analysis

by Annie Reneau
Djomas / Shutterstock

We all make friends of various kinds at various times in our lives. We may have friends from childhood, friends from college, friends from work, friends from our communities, and more. A friend is someone you like and enjoy being around. A friend is someone you connect with. A friend is someone you can trust to care about you and your family. Friends are amazing.

But not all friends are BFFs. A BFF is a whole different ballgame.

A BFF (a childhood throwback to “Best Friends Forever” for those living under a rock) is a friend times a hundred. Maybe a friend times a hundred million. A BFF doesn’t just know you and like you — they get you. These are the unshakable friendships that weather every storm and endure every trial. A BFF is family — sometimes more family than actual family even.

You may have one BFF or a handful (I’ve never been a one-best-friend-kinda gal myself), but you know a BFF when you find one.

A friend will sympathize with the brutal reality of having a colicky baby. A BFF will come hold and rock your screaming spawn so you can shower and take a much-needed nap.

A friend will send you a get-well card when you are sick. A BFF will drop everything to bring your family takeout and toilet paper.

A friend will tell you you’re doing a great job raising your kids. A BFF will toast to the sentiment that neither of you has any idea what you’re doing and commiserate over the fact that you’re probably doing something to drive your kids into therapy.

A friend won’t judge you if your house is messy when they come over to visit. A BFF will grab a full laundry basket and fold your family’s underwear with you while you chat.

A friend will forgive you when you back out of plans because you’re too tired. A BFF will change their plans, bring over a quart of ice cream, and hang out with you in your jammies.

A friend will extend an open offer to watch your kids if you need a break. A BFF will notice you at your wit’s end, arrive at your doorstep with popcorn and a kid flick, and kick you out of your own home for a few hours.

A friend will nod and laugh in agreement about the misery of chin hairs. A BFF understands that it’s her duty to pluck yours if you fall into a coma.

A friend will tell you you look great in anything you’re wearing. A BFF will tell you your jeans aren’t flattering and take you shopping for a new pair.

A friend will hug you when you cry and offer soothing words to comfort you. A BFF will hold you and cry with you in silence.

A friend will tell you it’s great to hear from you when you’ve gone a while between chats and that she understands how life gets busy. A BFF will pester you relentlessly and won’t give up until you call her back, no matter how long it takes.

A friend will tell you what you want to hear to help you feel better. A BFF will tell you what you need to hear to help you be better.

A friend is an ice cream cone on a nice day. A BFF is a glass of ice water on a sweltering day.

A friend is someone who likes you and wishes you well. A BFF is someone who adores you and wishes you lived next door.

A friend is someone you can share your hopes and dreams with. A BFF is someone you create your hopes and dreams with.

Friends are fabulous. They are vital to our wellness and happiness, and our lives wouldn’t be the same without them. But BFFs provide that extra oomph, that special closeness, that keen understanding that make our lives undeniably rich and help us know ourselves.

Here’s to the BFFs. May we all live long enough to build the non-creepy communes we’ve always dreamed of living in together.