Girl Talk, Then And Now

by Rebekah Kuschmider
Originally Published: 

I recently had lunch with a girlfriend whom I’ve known for about 20 years. She and I have seen each other through every life change from first dates and breakups to weddings and babies. As we were chatting over lunch, I realized that the nature of our girl talk has slightly altered over the years. When we met, we were in our early 20s and working retail jobs between happy hours and shopping trips. Now, she’s 42, I’m much younger than she is at 41, and we’re both stay-at-home moms to two kids apiece. Instead of roommates and rent payments, we have husbands and house payments.

As the topography of our lives has changed, so too have our conversations. The subjects that held us transfixed in our 20s are not even on our radar anymore. We still have plenty to say, but the topics have changed. For example:

Then: Cosmetics

Back in the day, we could talk about mascara and nail polish until the cows came home.

Now: Cosmetic Dermatology

Nowadays, we’ve upgraded to microdermabrasion and amazing spa facials, and our skin looks better now than it ever did!

Then: Body Image

One upon a time, we boosted each other’s self-esteem with the magic words “Those jeans make your butt look amazing!”

Now: Body Function

These days we’re using our bodies to do some kick-ass stuff. I ran a half-marathon and my friend started taking martial arts again.

Then: Shoes

We didn’t have Carrie Bradshaw’s budget, but we did have her taste.

Now: Boots

Times have changed and so has fashion. Goodbye strappy sandals, hello tall boots! Ooh, and Uggs for winter. And adorable wellies for walking to school on rainy days. And…

Then: Shopping for Cute Clothes

Payday used to mean running out to pick out a great new outfit for the weekend.

Now: Shopping for Cute Clothes for Our Kids

Payday means running out to buy jeans because our kids grew an inch overnight and all their pants are floods. Seriously, why do kids grow so fast? But while we’re shopping for them, let’s go look at some boots.

Then: Bragging About Sex

Think only guys talk about conquests? Ha. Notches in the old lipstick case, baby.

Now: Bragging About Sexy Weekends Away

Anniversary getaway? Birthday overnight at a fancy hotel with the husband? Yes, please!

Then: Happy Hour

Dollar PBR night? Holla!

Now: Wine Tasting

Touring a winery and learning how to pair wine with food? I’m so in!

Then: Dates

“Oooooo! I’m going out with a boy on Friday! He’s soooo cute! And he likes my favorite band!”

Now: Date Nights

“Oooooo! I found a sitter for Friday! She’s soooo great! And she does the dishes after the kids are in bed!”

Then: Roommates

The guy who had loud sex in the mornings, the substitute teacher who got daily robo-calls at 6 a.m., the gay guy who loved to watch Golden Girls reruns with us. Our roommates were a rotating cast of characters that helped us afford our apartments.

Now: Renovations

Picking backsplashes is better than vetting potential housemates any day!

Then: Push-Up Bras

It used to be lingerie was a fashion statement, the base layer of an awesome outfit. Bras put our boobs on display in the best way possible.

Now: Push-Up Bras

Let’s face it, some things never change. Hot lingerie is still hot.

The good news is, we find boots and travel plans just as hilarious and awesome as we found sex and shopping when we were younger. I just hope in 20 more years, we’ll still be laughing as hard as we have the past 20.

This article was originally published on