Dax Shepard and Kristen Bell are dropping more marriage wisdom on us
No matter who your partner is, marriage is work. Movies make it look like being with your soulmate is all puppies, roses, and happiness, but anyone who’s ever been in a real relationship knows the truth: marriage is beyond hard.
Kristen Bell and Dax Shepard have long been open about how hard they work to maintain their marriage. They’ve given multiple interviews since their 2013 wedding where they’ve shamelessly opened up about going to marriage therapy — shamelessly because it’s totally normal, OK, and healthy to do that — and they know it.
In a new interview with Us Weekly, Shepard opened up once again about how hard he and Bell have to work to stay married and in love, even though they make it look so effortless to those of us on the outside of their adorable relationship.
“We don’t believe in The One. We don’t believe in the fairy tale. We don’t believe that you can meet someone and you have perfectly matching personalities,” Shepard explained. “We are opposites and it has taken a tremendous amount of work and therapy for us to coexist.”
Can we just take a moment to appreciate, once again, that these two are working so hard to normalize therapy and the idea that even happy couples should go? Having a professional help you work through stuff, whether as a couple or individually, is never a bad thing, because everyone has stuff and can use a hand with it sometimes. The mistake a lot of couples probably make is thinking there’s something “wrong” about seeking therapy, and Shepard points out why that’s simply untrue.
“My only fear is that people see us and think, ‘Oh, I just need to find my Kristen Bell.’ That’s not true. You’ll find your Kristen Bell but guess what, now the work starts,” Shepard continued. “[Relationships] are labor intensive. If you want them to last they are labor intensive.”
Yes. Yes, yes, yes. All relationships are hard work. Finding your person is only the beginning, and the tough stuff starts afterward. There has never been truer marriage advice said.
Of course, therapy isn’t the only trick up their sleeves. Shepard also revealed he and Bell’s hard-and-fast rule for making their relationship a priority alongside two busy acting careers.
“The family rule is no more than two weeks a art no matter what,” he said. “There isn’t an excuse.”
Just one more thing we can all learn from one of our favorite celebrity couples.