A Very Unscientific, Mom-Centric Examination Of The Best Girl Scout Cookies
Because everyone has an opinion.
The most wonderful time of the year is upon us: Girl Scout Cookie season. It’s something we all — and by we all I mean the editors at Scary Mommy — look forward to with bated breath, with open wallets, with salivating mouths. From the moment you place your order (and yes, sometimes it can be one of many orders), to the second those Thin Mints touch your lips, you are in heaven. True, unbridled heaven.
Because we are intelligent, savvy women, many of us — and, again, by many of us I mean the editorial team at Scary Mommy — have a strategy in place when it comes to ordering. Sure, you could try the new Raspberry Rally cookies, but why do that to yourself when you could indulge in your tried-and-true favorites? And sure you could sprinkle the new Thin Mint seasoning on top of just any mediocre cookie, but again, why do that to yourself?
When we realized that we all had very strong feelings about Girl Scout Cookies, we decided the only fairest way to express ourselves was to organize our personal thoughts and lay them out here for you, dear reader, to commiserate with and yes, maybe to judge.
So here’s our unfiltered thoughts on Girl Scout Cookies. ‘Tis the season, and long may she reign.
I have a controversial Girl Scout cookie opinion: Thin Mints are not the best ones. Samoas aren’t the best ones. The best Girl Scout cookie is in fact the Tagalong. It offers all the goodness of a Reese’s Peanut Butter Cup, plus a little cookie bottom. It’s a little sweet and a little salty. It is the perfect snack! Lovely with a cup of tea or coffee! I can hear you howling from here; I am however a former Girl Scout and current Girl Scout co-leader and so I like to think I know what I’m talking about. Another hot take: Do-Si-Does are unfairly maligned! Also, I wish they’d bring back Juliettes. And maybe we could try politely ripping off McVitie’s Chocolate Hobnobs next year? Just a thought. — Kelly Faircloth
A friend and I were recently gifted a box of nearly every Girl Scout cookie flavor, which we obviously saw for exactly what it was: an excellent excuse to taste test and rank them. And it's the Samoas for me. All the other cookies are meager attempts to match the magical combination that is coconut, caramel, and chocolate. My husband says Thin Mints are superior, but I love him despite this serious lapse in judgment. Plus, he sometimes crumbles them up and puts them in my ice cream, thus reminding me that he still has redeeming qualities. — Julie Sprankles
I realized I have a secret Girl Scout Cookie ordering strategy when I went to place my order (and by “my order,” I mean one of my multiple orders I have to make since we go through them so quickly) this year. I’m Team Thin Mint, my husband is Team Samoa and my kids are Team Any Cookie (they are misguided and very into S’mores mostly). In any event, I ordered enough boxes of the other cookies so they would be distracted by them while I hoard the Thin Mints. To me, the Thin Mint is the perfect cookie. It succeeds where the Mint Milano fails, in that it is covered in chocolate. It is delicious from the pantry or frozen, accompanied by ice cream and without. It is just perfection, and no one can tell me otherwise. — Kate Auletta
When Girl Scout Cookie season arrives in my town, cute little girls set up shop outside the local grocery store, doing way more selling work than they need to because I am a Girl Scout Cookie loyalist. I will bust out my $5 (OK, fine $20) bill with a smile as I happily purchase a box or ten. Maybe it’s the sweet nostalgia that the pictures on the boxes never change (Hi exuberant girl zip-lining on the Thin Mints box! Proud of you!) or maybe it’s that I was once that eager-to-sell youngin’, wearing my patch-filled vest with pride, looking to make some sales. Either way, Girl Scout Cookie season is sacred in my heart (and in my pantry). — Katie Garrity
Okay, first of all, it’s extremely important to buy a few boxes of Girl Scout cookies for your family and then a few separate boxes only for you that your family will never, ever find out about. Each year I buy a box of Thin Mints, a box of Samoas, and a box of Tagalongs only for myself and hide them in the deep recesses of the fridge, like behind the giant Costco bag of frozen chicken breasts. I get to eat a cookie whenever I need a little treat, and they last for months because my kids don’t know about them. My second tip? Save a box of Samoas for camping this summer and stick a roasted marshmallow between them. They’re like s’mores on steroids. — Sarah Aswell
The Girl Scouts market their cookies to me at the wrong time of the year. They always hit me up for orders after the holidays when I am trying to return to eating healthier with more salad and fewer treats. I will casually mention to my husband that I heard they are setting up a stand at the grocery store. He’ll groan and reply, “Please don’t. We'll eat them all.” One of us will eventually give in (usually him) and buy at least four for $20. That afternoon one box will be considered a single serving for my family of four, and they will be gone by 5 PM. It’s so hard to resist the peanut butter goodness of a Tagalong. — Katy Elliott