Puns With Catitude

These Purrfect Cat Puns Are Sure To Get You Laughing Hiss-terically!

You’ve got to be kitten me right meow.

by Team Scary Mommy
Updated: 
Originally Published: 
cat puns and jokes: black cat is wearing bread frame on its head
Stéphane Berla/Getty

If you’re a cat person this one’s for you! Some people are turned off by felines because they’re not as affectionate as dogs. However, that’s what makes the love of a cat so special. You won’t have to worry about walking your cat because they are potty trained. There’s no need to rush home to “let them out.” They are also super chill furry friends that come in all shapes and sizes. Cats are really low maintenance and costs next to nothing to feed. And if your kid is allergic to pet fur, guess what? They have hairless cats too. Although they can sometimes be jerks, your cat will always remind you how much you mean to them. So if you are looking for some hilarious jokes to tell your kitty (because they’re like the best listeners) you’ve come to the right place.

There are a million and one reasons to love cat jokes and even more to adore cats. This isn’t a puppy bashing page, but there are reasons kitties are preferred. Cats are super independent, cute, and can even use the bathroom on their own. (No early morning poop walks!) They are super low maintenance, and with a kitty around, mice won’t dare enter your home. Cats are all about the chill vibes and may not jump on you as soon as you walk through the door, but they do give awesome cuddles when you need it most.

Being a cat lady in its purr-est form, I cannot resist throwing in a cat pun wherever possible. But you don’t have to be a crazy cat lady to get a kick out of these hilarious cat puns and jokes. Whether you’re an animal lover or not, there’s no resisting a good bad joke… even if it is about cats. Check out this list of cat jokes sure to tickle your sides (or belly).

RELATED: 250 Hilarious Jokes For Kids That Adults Find Funny Too

1. I’ve got my thinking cat on!

2. Wanna hear a bad cat joke?

Just kitten.

3. Lookin’ good, feline good.

4. Wife: “Your obsession with cats is outta control and I can’t handle it anymore!”

Husband: “So you’re kicking meeeowt?”

5. It ain’t easy being purrfect.

6. Why couldn’t the cat read a book?

It was il-LITTER-ate.

7. Curb your cattitude!

8. What’s it called when a cat paints itself?

A self paw-trait.

9. Our office furniture is too nice…

Scratch that!

10. All you knead is love.

retales botijero/Getty

11. What do cats do after a fight?

They hiss and make up.

12. What do cats wear to bed?

Paw-jamas.

13. You’ve got to be kitten me right now!

14. Ever tried to steal catnip from a cat?

Fuggedaboutit.

15. What would happen if a cat and vinegar had a baby?

A sourpuss.

16. What do cats like to eat on a hot day?

A mice-cream cone.

17. Why do cats always get their way?

They are very purr-suasive.

18. What should you use to comb a cat?

A catacomb.

19. What is a cat’s favorite movie?

The Sound of Mewsic.

20. How do you know a cat is agitated?

He’s having a hissy fit.

21. What’s a cat’s favorite magazine?

Good Mousekeeping.

22. Why did the cat wear a fancy dress?

She was feline fine.

23. What’s a cat’s favorite color?

Purr-ple.

24. Why was the cat afraid of the tree?

Because of its bark.

25. What did the cat say when it was confused?

“I’m purr-plexed!”

26. What’s a cat’s favorite dessert?

Chocolate mouse.

27. Where does a cat go when it loses its tail?

The re-tail store.

28. What do you call a cat who lives in an igloo?

An eskimew.

29. How do cats stop crimes?

They call claw enforcement.

30. Why was the cat so agitated?

Because he was in a bad mewd.

31. What do you call a cat who loves to bowl?

An alley cat.

32. What do cats love to do in the morning?

Read the mewspaper.

33. How is cat food sold?

Usually, purr the can.

34. What do baby cats always wear?

Diapurrs.

35. Why do cats always win video games?

Because they have nine lives.

36. What state has a lot of cats and dogs?

Petsylvania.

37. What’s a cat’s favorite game to play with a mouse?

Catch.

38. What do you call a pile of kittens?

A meowntain.

40. What do cats eat for breakfast?

Mice Krispies.

41. Where do cats always fly out of when they travel?

Kitty Hawk.

42. How does a cat sing scales?

Do-re-mew.

43. Why did the cats ask for a drum set?

They wanted to make some mewsic.

44. What’s a cat’s favorite TV show?

Claw and Order.

45. How did the Mom cat know she was pregnant?

Her test was pawsitive.

46. What normally happens when kitties go on a first date?

They hiss.

47. What’s a cat’s favorite cereal?

Mice crispies.

48. What does the cat say after making a joke?

“Just kitten!”

49. When cats need to go to the airport, who do they call?

A tabby.

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