A Dentist Shares That Men Come To Appointments Without Knowing Why They're There

A recent poll found that a shocking 82% of medical appointments booked for men are made by women. Yes, you read that right: a huge number of men rely on their wives and mothers to stay healthy and take care of themselves. And a huge number of women are their family’s “health keepers,” — adding to their mental load and invisible labor.

Now, Dr. Brady Smith, a dentist and content creator, is sharing that not only are many men not making their own healthcare appointments, but they’re showing up to his office without knowing whey they’re there in the first place.

“Men will come to their dental visits sometimes without knowing whey they’re there, and as a dentist, that’s odd to come face to face with when I walk into the room,” Smith begins. “When I say, ‘It looks like you’re here for a check-up and a cleaning,’ they say, ‘I don’t know, I didn’t schedule the appointment.’”

Smith makes clear that this is not something that all kinds of people do — it’s really one specific gender.

“That does not happen with women,” he continues. “Sixteen years of doing this and I’ve never seen a woman arrive at a dental office without knowing what they’re doing there.”

The dentist is most surprised that the men who admit they don’t know why they’re at his office don’t seem bothered by their situation.

“When I have this interaction, and it’s regular, it happens all the time, the men are not embarrassed,” he says. “There’s no humiliation happening. And there should be a little bit.”

Smith then suggests that men simply ask their wives what the appointment is about before leaving the house, but we have an even better idea: book your own appointments! Especially the ones about your own body parts!

Smith does, though, have a great idea of what to do when a man shows up to his office without knowing the reason.

“If one more guy says I don’t know what I’m doing here and my wife scheduled the appointment, I’m going to create a wheel of services,” he offers. “It’s going to have root canal, full dentures, sinus lift, tooth whitening, night guard… F around with a laser. And we’re going to spin that wheel. And whatever it lands on, that’s what you’re getting.”

Love it!

Down in the comments, other medical professionals chimed in.

“As a physician, I’d say about 85% of my male patients don’t know how to answer their own medical history and medication list,” one doctor shared. “As soon as I ask my first question, ‘Do you have any allergies?’ They look over to their wife, completely clueless, and she proceeds to answer the rest of the questions in detail. It’s gotten to the point where if a man is there and knows all of his own medical history, I feel the urge to say, Wow! What a big boy you are!’”

“As an RN I don't know how many times a male patient will say, ‘I don't know, ask THE wife,’” another added.

“This!! as a physician I see this more times than I can count,” another doctor said. “I had a male patient once who had a huge abdominal surgical scar. I asked him what surgery had and he had no clue. He turned to his wife and said, ‘Hey honey, what did I have done again?’ SIR, somebody cut into your body and you have no idea why without your wife's help? Learned helplessness at it's finest.”

“Happens at the doctor too,” another shared. “The amount of times fathers come with their kids saying, ‘idk my wife said to bring them in.’”

“Even in peds, during an assessment dads call mom and put her on speaker bc they cannot answer a single question about their child,” another pediatrician added. “Not always but definitely 8/10 times!”

Maybe it’s time that we start letting the beloved men in our lives have the teeth rot out of their mouths... or it’s time to try Dr. Smith’s wheel idea!