What Are ‘iPad Kids’ Turning Into As Teens? Psychologists Answer

Parents of iPad kids — that stereotypical kid with a tablet in their hands in line, in waiting rooms, at restaurant tables — get a lot of flack online. As in, they’ve literally been called borderline abusive by other parents. But even parents who don’t allow any screen time at all are judged too; no matter what side you’re on, it seems someone’s going to have an opinion. Whether you’re strict on your kids’ screen time limits or they have unfettered access to tech (listen, it’s summer break, OK?), maybe you’ve wondered before: what do iPad kids turn into as teens? Am I really screwing them over for life by letting them zone out through the last 30 minutes of dinner while we wait for the check?

Every parent is probably familiar with the downsides of too much screen time: they’re addicting, overstimulating, and don’t allow kids to learn how to sit in their boredom and cultivate patience. Handing your kid a tablet once in a while is not the end of the world, but habitual tech use to placate kids does concern experts. But it’s not all bad, said Dr. Jerry Weichman, clinical psychologist, adolescent mental health specialist, and founder of The Weichman Clinic in California.

“Teens who grew up as iPad kids are actually more resourceful than I think they get credit for. Between Google, YouTube, and now AI, today’s teens can quickly figure out solutions to problems and are also more adept at multitasking, which can be great strengths,” he said. “Unfortunately though, the weaknesses outweigh the strengths.”

The prevailing assumption about so-called iPad kids is that they won’t know how to be bored or cope in real-life settings because they are always given their tablets as a crutch. But is that really the case?

“In my practice, I am noticing that the teens who grew up with constant access to smart devices present with a higher level of anxiety, emotional dysregulation, and lower frustration tolerance,” says Dr. Nidhi Gupta, a pediatric endocrinologist and the founder of the Phreedom Foundation, a non-profit organization that helps individuals, families, and professionals build a more balanced relationship with their devices. “Kids develop these skills by experiencing manageable amounts of discomfort and learning to cope with it — for example, waiting in line, riding in the car, or flying in an airplane without entertainment helps build tolerance and patience. When every idle moment is filled with a screen, children have fewer opportunities to build these skills naturally.”

Gupta agrees that while the current generation of teens have a whole arsenal of tech-savvy skills previous generations didn’t at their age, they often don’t understand the toll technology has taken on their childhood. Many teens struggle with maintaining attention, holding conversations, time management, self-care, and healthy sleep habits, she says.

To be clear, these experts don’t blame parents. Our society is not set up to support the needs of children and families as well as it should, and many of us have looked around for our village only to find we’re standing alone out in the cold. So yes, we’ve probably all put a tablet in our child’s hands to prevent a tantrum or give ourselves 30 minutes of quiet. Those of us with teens didn’t know what we now know about the addictive nature of screens — and the developmental importance of boredom — when they were little. That data is new.

If you do feel like your teen is too reliant on their devices and can’t cope with discomfort on their own, there are steps you can take to help them unplug. The first (and most obvious) is, of course, reducing their screen time. Today’s teens average 23 hours of screen time per week according to Weichman, who says giving up one day of every week of their lives is “a tragedy.”

“Taking a device-free break, having time limits, and setting an evening curfew for devices can help, Weichman says. “What your kids do with that space and downtime is up to them. It’s also a great opportunity for family time, like taking a walk together or playing a board game. My retort to any of my kids — I have an elementary-, middle- and high-schooler — when they say they are bored is to respond with ‘only boring people get bored, and that’s not you, so get creative.”

The point is to give your kids space to practice being intentional and flexing their willpower, Gupta adds. It works best when you do it as a family, creating screen-free routines and emphasizing sleep and good health habits as a unit.

“Electronic addiction is going to be the mental health crisis of this next generation. Some data is showing that consuming short-form content is exponentially more addictive than alcohol; their bandwidth for real-life, interpersonal conversations as well as for reading longer form content diminishes. So much more needs to be done by federal, state and local officials to help prevent children and teens from becoming addicted. Meanwhile, the longer parents can wait before giving their child a phone or device, the better off they will be in life,” says Weichman.

So yes, the collective assumptions about iPad kids may actually be rooted in truth. Fortunately, any skills they’re lacking can easily be rebuilt with a little role modeling from Mom and Dad.