An Ode To Being Medium Years Old

So many beautiful human creatures fight the magic of growing older. Personally, I love being medium years old. You know, I don’t feel OLD. Yet, when I meet a 21 year old, I KNOW I am not that anymore.

I am just perfectly medium.

Still enjoying life, just with more scars that brought me lessons which became wisdom.

Don’t get me wrong, there are days when I miss my 22 year old body. That girl could eat an inappropriate amount of cheese and there would be no repercussions.

Yes, some days I gently put my hand on my abdomen and sigh. What was once smooth only to be interrupted by my bedazzled belly button is now an abandoned battle field from having two 10-pound babies 13 months apart.

Was it worth it for those two blue-eyed deedle boys of mine? Oh yes. Is it also less sexy? Also yes.

I smile thinking about the surgeon about to take me in to have an umbilical hernia repaired, and he points to my belly button ring hole. “Do I need to cut up higher to save this?” I shrug and say, “No that’s not a thing anymore. Do whatever you need to do.”

Yes, these days my decisions are all based on efficiency and logic. It’s a new world. Here’s the thing — I’ll gladly retire my belly button ring for the benefits of being medium years old.

Here are my top five reasons:

More self awareness.

If you are paying attention at all, by this many years in, you have a lot of data on yourself. If you are brave enough to take a look, you could understand what environments you thrive in. What type of self care works for you? Who are the people that light you up when they are around?

Put an extra effort into staying close to people who feel like sunshine.

Gratitude for my body.

Yes, my abs used to look better a decade ago, but I was entitled by youth. Nowadays my body has many more miles on it, but damn I am thankful for this house. The only home I will ever truly own.

This body cooked and gave birth to two amazing, magic, blue-eyed miracles. This body has held and comforted so many small children. This body has conquered yoga teacher training, 39-mile breast cancer walks, back surgery, gallbladder removal, hernia repair, broken arm, black eyes, and the time I got kneed in the crotch during AAU basketball and had bruising in places that were previously suspected to be unbruisable. This body can do hard things. I now know that nothing is the end of the world. I am always capable of rebuilding, healing, and growing.

Peer pressure does nothing to me.

No longer do I feel the need to do anything that I don’t want to do in hopes of acceptance/inclusion. We were just at the inflatable park and my medium brother and sister were trying to get me to go on certain things, and I would smile and give them the finger when my children’s backs were turned. I was more than happy to enjoy the day on the ground and not on some unstable surface in which I would surely pee my pants.

My brain is fully developed, and I’ve learned about my brain.

Having a fully developed brain is great for maintaining healthy relationships and running my life. I don’t want my old butt back if it comes with the impulsivity of decision making of my teens.

I know that hurt people hurt people. These days I am well aware that if someone says something unkind to you or talks badly about you, it’s always about them. Lack of self esteem, jealousy, unaddressed trauma, and grief are just some of the underlying triggers that make people lash out and be critical of others.

Yup, being medium, it’s all sticks and stones. It’s like I tell the kids — I love when people talk about me, because it’s confirmation that I’m interesting.

I understand that I am the creator.

In your youth you feel like the world is happening to you. When you’re medium years old, if you’re lucky, you understand that you have created it all. You choose your job. You choose your life partner. You choose what environments you put yourself in. You decide how to spend your time. You are in charge of creating healthy boundaries; the world won’t do it for you.

Now if you look around and feel as though you have created something crappy, no worries, my friend. Check out this medium wisdom — you are never too old to create something new!

Do not scoff at being medium just cause you got a few wrinkles on that bod. Be happy that there is no better time in life to be living and loving. Start looking around and realizing there are so many reasons to be grateful.

If you are still pouting about having to adult and pay bills, take your right hand and look at your palm.

Then slap yourself in the face for me.

You are the smartest, best version of yourself right now. Celebrate it.