To All The Moms From A Childless Woman: I See Your Strength

by Lindsay Detwiler
Monkey Business Images / Shutterstock

I have no clue what type of food a 2-year-old should eat or what a typical bedtime routine looks like. I don’t know what it’s like to hear “mom” yelled 99 times an hour or to have a tiny hand grasping mine. I don’t know what it’s like to have drawings on my refrigerator door or how it feels to read bedtime stories to an inquisitive young mind.

I don’t know what it’s like to worry every time your baby leaves your house that something scary will happen. I don’t know what it’s like to have to protect your child from the big bad world or to dry your child’s tears. I don’t know what it’s like to try to juggle soccer schedules, meal times, laundry, doctor appointments, and work. I don’t know what it’s like to function on two hours of sleep because scary monsters were hiding under the bed. I don’t know what it’s like to answer tough Santa Clause questions or to teach a 5-year-old about being kind.

As a childless woman, I don’t know so many things about motherhood, but I do know this: I admire all of you out there walking the journey of being a mom.

I see the way you talk about your children, about how even on the most frustrating days there’s nothing but unconditional love in your eyes. I see how you light up when you talk about their accomplishments or silly moments. I see the way you worry with everything in you that you’re doing a good job, that you’re making the right choices, and that everything is going to turn out okay.

I see the unwavering love you have for your children and your desire to do a good job…and it’s inspiring.

So many of you worry about judgment, worry that you’re not doing a good enough job. You worry because social media likes to jump on the mom-shaming train and it makes you feel like everyone’s watching you with a critical eye. Sometimes other women give us all a bad rap, making you feel like every woman is scrutinizing your parenting skills, that every woman is out to watch for your mistakes.

As a childless woman, though, I can honestly say I feel nothing but admiration for my friends who are moms. I might smile when you tell me how you handled a situation or when you give me the horrific details about an embarrassing moment, but I truly am not judging you. Instead, I’m looking at you in awe.

To juggle what you do with grace, with a smile, and with a sense of humor is such a beautiful thing to see.

There are so many things I’ve never experienced, and I know our lives are so different. But to all of the moms, I admire you for what you do. You might only see all of the mistakes and tough moments, but as an outsider looking in, all I see are strong women being amazing, loving mothers. All I see are women shaping the future, one little hand at a time, and doing an amazing job at it.